Four New Year’s Horror Stories — Devils, Ghosts and Deadly Bargains

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Hello, my spookies. It is
indeed the end of twenty twenty three,

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but I want to say thank you
all so much for the massive support.

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In fact, we just hit one
hundred and two Patreon backers, something I've

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been hoping for for years, and
we did it because of you out there,

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So a huge thank you. Thank
you so much to those who go

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to Weeklyspooky dot com, click on
Patreon, and for as little as one

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dollar a month, decide to support
the show directly and get two bonus shows

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every single week. But now it's
time to celebrate years gone by, so

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we have right here, right now, for your ears, four of our

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previous New Year's stories just for you. They're all a lot of fun.

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They're all a little weird, a
little gross, and very scary. So,

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my dear friend, as you relax
and say audios to twenty twenty three,

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enjoy these four stories right after these
quick words, Even the Devil tells

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the truth, sometimes by Damn Wilder, a Weekly Spooky or wagabal. The

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first couple of years, I just
went for hookers. I figured no one

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would go looking for those broads anytime
soon. It was simple. While everyone

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was staring at that big stupid ball
like a bunch of deer in headlights.

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I'd find my gal taking her down
an alley and doing them up proper.

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A happy New Year's for me in
theory anyway, The problem is those bitches

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looked like they were relieved, and
why wouldn't they be. The knife was

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just an their long, hard object, painfully crammed inside them. But this

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one brought an end to their filthy
existence. Christ it was so hard to

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get excited over that work, but
I did my best. Damn I've gotten

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ahead of myself again. I suppose
you want to know what makes me tick?

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Huh, well, go fuck yourself, just messing with you. What

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do you want to know? My
parents were real pieces of work. My

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dad drank his life away in every
pisshole bar down by the docks, and

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my mom sold ass in the same
I was unplanned, unwanted, and never

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made to forget it. Except none
of that hard luck garbage is true.

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I grew up in a nice suburb. Mom was a teacher and homemaker,

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Dad was an accountant. The biggest
threat to my childhood was the fact that

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I was spoiled, rotten, or
as spoiled as a middle class brat can

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be. So what made me turn
bad? I have no idea. See

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back around seventy six or so,
beating the shit out of strangers for no

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reason was how I got my kicks. But little did I know this was

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gonna be the mazzarella stick planner before
the eggplant parm that is my career these

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days. Let me tell you.
Anyway, I'd pulped this cat down Chinatown

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Way, dig looking for any ill
gotten gains I could grab. I found

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some sort of amulet in his left
pocket, older than my Aunt Petunia,

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and expensive too. At least I
hoped it would be when I went upawn

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it. That would have to wait, though, because beating the shit out

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of a man is hungry work.
In my stomach, it was growling something

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fierce. Thirty minutes later, I
was kicked back in my easy chair in

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my rat trap of an apartment,
Hamburger grease mixed with thin blood from that

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rare paddy dripping down my arm.
That's when I remembered my spoils. I

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reached into my pants pocket and brought
out that glittering trinket, now covered with

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slop from my chow. That's when
that bauble went shiny and hit me with

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some sort of mumbo jumbo magic that
sent me sprawling across the floor. Things

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went black for a hot second,
but when I came to, he was

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just sitting there on top of the
giant zenith. Well, I say he,

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but in truth it may have been
a she or a human shaped lump

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of clam dip, because no matter
how hard I stared at this thing,

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I could never get a clear look
at it. But I could tell it

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was dressed to the nines and always
smiling. What's so far, I asked.

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That's when the fucker talked directly to
my brain. And while I can

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tell you what it said wasn't in
any language I'd ever heard, I understood

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every damn word, the bit about
immortality, the murder biz that would seal

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the bargain one ex woman every midnight
on New Year's Eve. Hell, the

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son of a bitch even had a
big contract for me to sign, like

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something out of a goddamn comic book. And naturally that pen was filled.

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You guessed it with blood too much? Right, So YadA, YadA,

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Lucifer Hookers and blood, and here
we are New Year's Eve, nineteen seventy

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nine and it's time for a change. But since not a lot of you

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clowns are familiar with my work,
let me take you through my nine to

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five if you can pick up what
I'm laying down. I wake up round

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noonish. See. I set my
own hours so I can sleep in a

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real job perk if you ask me
so. Yeah, shit, shower,

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shave, fry up an egg maybe
two for breakfast, orange juice and vodka.

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Then on with the day's business.
I cruise the streets, and it

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is cold as a witch's tit out
here. But this involves my work the

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three hundred and sixty four days,
it isn't December thirty. First I just

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kind of walk around with a heart
on and get as much attention from the

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leather boys and hustlers as I can, marking in my mind who is where

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and when. See the devil is
in the details. Then I take in

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a porno flick or too, grab
a dog or a slice, then make

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my way back through the spank bank
of earlier. I go for the toughest,

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strongest looking laddie I can find.
Then I punch and kick the ever

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loving shit out of them, rob
them, and maybe do the same to

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any tourists unfortunate enough to cross my
path and then it's off for a cup

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of joe. What the hooker thing
only applies to the killing, and I

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only do that to the ladies once
a year to honor that bargain. The

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rest of the year, they just
ain't my bag. Here's the rub.

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I don't really give a rats puckered, pink asshole about the living foreverthing.

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Who needs that static? No,
I just I'm just thankful that someone put

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the notion of killing a woman into
my thick skull. Most of the time,

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I don't think about dames at all
unless they're up on that stained silver

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screen. Plus, it inspired me
to up my game in the whole inflicting

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pain on my fellow man game that
I've been so fond of. It makes

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perfect and all that. Besides,
who knows if that shit would still apply

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anyway. I hawked that amulet the
next day for two hundred bucks and a

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six or a bud. Where the
fuck was I? Oh, yeah,

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yeah, I might my day all
day every day, so I head home,

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take a shower, believe it or
not, maybe throw in a TV

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dinner, catch some tube. You
know what really tickles my asshole with a

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feather, grabbing a paper and seeing
if anyone reports on the shit I do.

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Hey, what can I say?
I'm kind of like a gutter narcissus.

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Hey, I went to high school
just like everybody else. Anyway,

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those rags never say a peep about
me or the meat I tend to rise

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probably never will either. Fuck them. Nighttime more of the same. Really,

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I work two shifts a day,
seven days a week, and that's

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dedication no one can match. And
I don't even have a union or nothing.

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Now that's January first to December thirtieth. But that next day, that's

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where the shit gets serious. I
take a little personal time for the most

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of the day, do a bump, maybe rub a few out, grab

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a nice steak from Sizzler for lunch, real self care type shit you dig

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Now, most years I would just
hang out on the fringes of Times Square

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looking for my mark. But as
I said, this year was gonna be

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a big one. So after Sizzler, I got a haircut, just gotta

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look good for this, I yank
a magazine off the news stand and tear

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out a sample of cologne. I
wasn't kidding around here, folks, believe

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you me class all the way.
Anyway, I get to Times Square early

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and the one thing you out of
towner is watching from your big comfy couches.

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Probably don't realize. Motherfuckers line up
for this thing hours an hour before

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anything is even going on, just
standing in the cold, hard street and

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milling around like fucking zombies or something. I kick around for a bit,

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taking a drag on a marb here
and there. As I look around,

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I have to admit there are some
spectacular candidates out there, much better than

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the ridden, hard and put away
wet flotsam and jetsam of the last few

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years. A strawberry blonde with gigantic
tits and braces that catch the now setting

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sun when she flashes big smiles at
her friend. And equally attractive Spanish chick

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with the blackest hair I have ever
seen. You can bet those two are

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on my shit list for sure,
but they just ain't the one. I

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continue my search. I see a
cute Chinese girl here, a sexy socialite

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there, all big ticket scores for
sure, but again, I gotta feel

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this one in my balls. Then
it hit me. Fuck it's cold out

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here. I need a coffee and
his fate if you believe in such bullshit

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would have it. There was a
donut shop directly across from me. I

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went in, ordered a cup and
took a load off for a tick.

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Now I don't believe in fate,
but then again, before a few years

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ago, I never thought his infernal
majesty would be sitting atop my boob tube

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pulling the old faust gag. So
here we are, anyway, out of

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the ladies room. She came,
looking for all the world like an angel

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in the flesh. Well, little
angel, tonight's the night you get your

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wings clipped. I watched her go
up to the counter in order. The

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way she moved, I could tell
she was athletic, but there was more.

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Was she a ballerina gymnast? Damned
if I know. But she definitely

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took care of herself, that's for
sure. Her hair was like spun gold.

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I liked that it would show the
blood better once I did the devil's

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business. Literally anyway, she paid, walked out, and I followed her

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close but not close enough to look
obvious. Dig yeah, So she snaked

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back through the crowds, the steam
from her coffee trailing behind her, which

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was leaving a nice trail for me
to follow, like that dude going through

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the Minotaur's maze. Damn, she
was with someone that would complicate things,

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but nothing I can't handle. Just
to have to think about how to get

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her away from that bozo she's with. That's when fortune smiled upon me for

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the second time that night. There
was that fool with his clipboard, and

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you know he was just on a
power trip like no other, just wandering

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the crowd, looking for the most
photogenic folks he could find and moving them

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right in line with the unblinking camera
eye that would beam this bullshit into homes

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nationwide. He'd be easy. I
dealt with dudes his size every ding dong

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freaking day. Hey, buddy,
you know that big shot producer running this

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thing. I noticed the lanyard around
the hot SHOT's neck. Damn it,

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Now, where did my lanyard go? I really played up looking for it

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too. Oscar material here for sure. Uh you mean Jim? Yeah,

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Jim, he wants to talk to
your ass pronto. Shit, probably wants

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me to get him a coffee.
Can't he see I'm trying to make this

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show special. I mean, look
at the prime trim I've picked out what

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was your name again? Bill?
I lied first year working the show.

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The full was actually buying this crap. Yeah, does it show? I

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pointed to where the lanyard should be
and chuckled, Eh, you'll be fine.

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Now where was Jim? This way? Follow me, I know a

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shortcut that'll take us right past this
mess. The people were becoming packed in

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like sardines. The roub followed me
like a lemming, right into the alley,

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where I smashed his fucking head in
against the ice covered bricks so many

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times the walls started to steam from
the sprays of his hot blood that splashed

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on it again and again. I
grabbed that clowns clipboard and lanyard, and

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I made my way back to where
I saw my angel last And there she

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was, just where I left her. Time to get the show on the

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road. Excuse me, miss Yes, pretty and shy too, jackpot,

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How would you like to come up
front watch the show? I work for

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the network. I pointed to the
lanyard for emphasis. Oh, I don't

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know. Then her man actually became
an accomplice in her pending murder. You

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have to you'll be on TV,
but can he come? Sorry? Producers

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want ladies only. I don't know, no sweat doll. I'll ask somebody

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else. I turned to walk away, like really playing it broad. Come

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on, Miranda, you have to
go. This is a once in a

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lifetime kind of thing. You don't
mind. No, we'll just meet here

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after the ball drops. Uh okay. I extended my arm and she took

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it with a slightly trembling hand.
I let her on and on a few

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twists here, a few turns there, and before you know it, we

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arrive at one Times Square. And
that's where things started to go south for

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yours cruelly. As I brought her
closer, Old Miranda got more and more

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nervous, and by the time I
showed her my long, hard blade,

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she'd bolted straight for the foyer of
that famous edifice without any hesitation. Mother

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fucking track and Field. I should
assuss that out, two cocky old man,

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I thought, as I played wolf
to her scared rabbit and gave pursuit.

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She'd already roused the half asleep rent
a cop that now leaped in my

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path. I flashed him my badge
and mumbled something about some teenager who had

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mooned the network's cameras, and the
dumb bastard he let me pass without any

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hesitation. I saw a quick flash
of the rabbit as she bolted up the

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stairway and out of sight. Fuck
that noise, I was elevator bound.

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I stopped the car a few floors
up as the door slid open. I

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could see only the back of her
shoes as she ascended even higher. It

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00:16:56.080 --> 00:16:59.279
did hit me at some point that
if she bothered to notice I was on

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the elevator and not running up those
damn steps behind her, that she simply

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had to go back down the stairs
as I continued going up like a prize

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winning dumb ass. Oh well,
here's to fear making folks make horrible decisions.

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My ace in the hole. The
elevator hit the top floor, the

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door hissed open, and my little
bunny was nowhere to be found. Now,

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what in the hell is this crap? I stuck my head out the

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elevator and whap a kick right across
the chops. Fucking karate two. This

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kid was full of surprises, that
was for sure. Damn she knocked me

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right on my ass. Slowly,
I stood and shook my head, trying

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00:17:41.720 --> 00:17:47.160
to get those damn spots and stars
from swirling around in the air. That's

205
00:17:47.200 --> 00:17:51.640
when the breeze hit me, cold
as a witch's tit and ten times as

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00:17:51.680 --> 00:17:57.519
hard the roof. The bitch had
gone out onto the roof. With my

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wits about me once more, I
bolted into the hall and immediately saw the

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00:18:02.359 --> 00:18:07.039
roof access door wide open. Oh
well, I wanted something to spice things

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00:18:07.119 --> 00:18:11.480
up, and I guess I got
my wish, that's for sure. But

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00:18:11.640 --> 00:18:17.319
god damn if those sullen eyed whorees
didn't look real good right about now,

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00:18:17.440 --> 00:18:21.799
let me tell you. I emerged
onto the roof and immediately got stung by

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00:18:21.799 --> 00:18:25.799
the biting cold. I need to
get this shit over and get my ass

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00:18:25.839 --> 00:18:29.799
home. Maybe uh throw a hungry
man in the oven and sip a beer

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00:18:30.079 --> 00:18:34.799
ten as the Late Late Show on
spools on WPIX. That's when I saw

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00:18:34.839 --> 00:18:41.680
her leaning against the framework of the
tower that would soon send that glittering ball

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00:18:41.720 --> 00:18:47.640
that illuminated her porcelain puss skyward.
I wasted no time and charged toward her

217
00:18:47.680 --> 00:18:49.720
like a freight train. Her eyes
grew wide, and she shimmeied up that

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00:18:49.799 --> 00:18:55.240
tower like greased lightning. Fine,
if that's what it takes I'm game.

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00:18:55.599 --> 00:18:56.920
As we made it to the top, I swear to you, the crowd

220
00:18:56.960 --> 00:19:02.680
below gasped in unison. What would
mister and missus America say at home?

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00:19:03.599 --> 00:19:07.920
Whatever? Screw those tamed monkeys this
year, We're going off script for the

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00:19:07.000 --> 00:19:12.359
ultimate act of performance art, and
this girl's body it's gonna be my canvas.

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Finally we made it to the top, and my quarry decided it was

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time to engage me in fisticuffs hundreds
of feet above old Manhattan Town. A

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00:19:22.000 --> 00:19:26.960
well landed punch here, a slice
and dice there, and we were almost

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00:19:26.960 --> 00:19:30.880
on equal footing until that damn ball
lifted off and began heading our way.

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00:19:32.359 --> 00:19:36.640
On and on we battled until that
freaking ball was at our feet, and

228
00:19:36.759 --> 00:19:41.279
that is when I put my faith
in Satan, grabbed that girl by the

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00:19:41.319 --> 00:19:45.960
throat, and kicked off that tower
with superhuman force. I swear to you.

230
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It seemed like we fell forever,
intertwined as lovers. And let me

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00:19:52.240 --> 00:19:57.400
tell you this climax, it was
gonna be a gusher. And then all

232
00:19:57.440 --> 00:20:04.160
went black with a moist splat as
a soundtrack. I flashed in and out

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00:20:04.200 --> 00:20:10.680
of consciousness. But I shit you
not, someone actually said it was beauty

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00:20:11.000 --> 00:20:15.079
that killed the beast. Like hell, it was I threw us off that

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00:20:15.240 --> 00:20:22.240
tower. Then all went black as
midnight for what seemed like forever. Then

236
00:20:22.279 --> 00:20:29.519
I heard a drum growing louder and
louder. Turns out it wasn't a drum,

237
00:20:29.559 --> 00:20:36.039
but something a little more personal.
I gasped as I woke up in

238
00:20:36.119 --> 00:20:41.079
the city Morgue, and as I
swung myself off the cold steel table on

239
00:20:41.119 --> 00:20:48.759
which I lay, I thought,
prints of lies my ass? Now where

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00:20:48.799 --> 00:21:11.880
are my clothes? Satan's Shotgun by
Daniel Wilder. I had a revelation come

241
00:21:11.960 --> 00:21:17.200
New Year's Eve of eighteen ninety nine. Jesus ain't nothing I reckon. I

242
00:21:17.240 --> 00:21:22.240
could resurrect myself like a right heavyweight
champion long as my boy's bones held out,

243
00:21:22.240 --> 00:21:26.079
that is, But admittedly I couldn't
hold a candle to that water to

244
00:21:26.240 --> 00:21:30.160
rot gut routine, and I sure
as fuck couldn't walk on water. And

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00:21:30.200 --> 00:21:33.640
they're sure as shit ain't any virgins
in my vicinity. I guess I truly

246
00:21:33.720 --> 00:21:38.160
meant that coming back from the dead
wasn't any great shakes. What brought me

247
00:21:38.200 --> 00:21:45.440
to that biddo revelation were the events
of nearly twelve years prior eighteen eighty seven,

248
00:21:45.519 --> 00:21:49.559
if you can cipher the night,
Gideon Pharaoh's Nightmare Zodiac Death Gang came

249
00:21:49.680 --> 00:21:56.359
a knocking, And that's exactly as
those hocus pocus braggarts build themselves too.

250
00:21:56.960 --> 00:22:00.680
Nightmare Zodiac Death Gang should have spent
more time practicing with pistols than coming up

251
00:22:00.720 --> 00:22:06.400
with candy ass gang titles. But
I digress. You see, I was

252
00:22:06.440 --> 00:22:10.119
a simple man then, farming,
maybe a bit of trap, and not

253
00:22:10.240 --> 00:22:12.559
to mention, interpreting for the local
tribes and those they caught in to trade

254
00:22:12.599 --> 00:22:15.400
with. It wasn't the high life, but it was good enough for me,

255
00:22:15.720 --> 00:22:21.839
Elizabeth and our boy Lazarus. That
name was a bit of a on

256
00:22:22.000 --> 00:22:26.200
the nose serendipity that the fates served
up to us by and the bye let

257
00:22:26.240 --> 00:22:30.440
me tell you true, And I
sure as hell wasn't amused. It weren't

258
00:22:30.480 --> 00:22:34.119
eighteen months after our boy's birth that
the sack headed sidewinder Gideon and his posse

259
00:22:34.319 --> 00:22:41.480
arrived on our doorstep and ended his
life and his mama's. But as was

260
00:22:41.519 --> 00:22:44.680
their folly, they never checked if
my heart had stopped, And to be

261
00:22:44.759 --> 00:22:48.240
fair, I never asked them why
they were so sore with me and mine.

262
00:22:48.319 --> 00:22:52.480
So yeah, mistakes were made all
around on that day. So once

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00:22:52.519 --> 00:22:56.720
their devilish deeds were done, they
headed off into the still night with naria

264
00:22:56.839 --> 00:23:02.440
thought of the hell they had borne
that day. And still my heart continued

265
00:23:02.480 --> 00:23:07.599
to beat like a native drum,
a doomed dirge, banging away to attract

266
00:23:07.640 --> 00:23:12.039
any midnight motherfucker within six hundred and
sixty six yards and a track, it

267
00:23:12.200 --> 00:23:18.160
surely did. The shaman entered what
remained of our home, casual as can

268
00:23:18.240 --> 00:23:22.920
be. The fully bandaged man he
led on a leash, followed seemingly devoid

269
00:23:22.039 --> 00:23:26.240
of thought as well as grace.
He slinked his way over to me like

270
00:23:26.279 --> 00:23:32.319
a mongoose, all sinew and glide, the bones around his waist clanking together,

271
00:23:32.440 --> 00:23:36.000
like the gnashing teeth of some desert
devil risen from an unholy hell,

272
00:23:36.319 --> 00:23:41.039
ready to feast. As my eyes
strained to focus, I saw that bastard

273
00:23:41.119 --> 00:23:45.000
light, a fire of green flame, a flame he used to rend the

274
00:23:45.079 --> 00:23:48.880
prone form of my boy to ashes
and bone. In as much time as

275
00:23:48.920 --> 00:23:52.559
it takes to tell, I admit, the darkness took me then, as

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00:23:52.599 --> 00:23:56.599
I was a powerful sight, weaker
in constitution than I am now, though

277
00:23:56.640 --> 00:24:02.240
I have a dread vision of that
bandaged fell placing a lipless mouth over my

278
00:24:02.400 --> 00:24:06.319
own, and blowing a dust that
wreaked a high hell oft deep into my

279
00:24:06.400 --> 00:24:08.960
lungs that made them feel as if
they was filled with the fire of old

280
00:24:10.000 --> 00:24:15.079
Scratch himself. I came to walking
along a trail deep in the nearby Adirondacks,

281
00:24:15.079 --> 00:24:21.400
a foul scented wrapping from the shaman's
friend tied tightly around my eyes.

282
00:24:22.079 --> 00:24:26.160
While you may get to thinking that
would seriously impede my journey, the exact

283
00:24:26.200 --> 00:24:30.000
opposite held true. I could sense
where I was going and just where the

284
00:24:30.000 --> 00:24:33.599
first of those I sawt were hunkered
down. So onward I trecked my boy's

285
00:24:33.640 --> 00:24:38.160
bones rattling, and the leather sack
strapped to my left shoulder. That same

286
00:24:38.240 --> 00:24:41.960
rattle let any man or beast in
my path know that I surely was not

287
00:24:42.079 --> 00:24:45.720
to be fucked with. As I
began my stride along Revenge's rough road,

288
00:24:47.519 --> 00:24:51.359
I walked those wicked woods until the
sun fell low and the sky was streaked

289
00:24:51.359 --> 00:24:55.279
in hues of lavender and rose.
And it was then I came upon the

290
00:24:55.359 --> 00:25:00.359
cabin on New Year's Eve, painted
as it were in two differing colors,

291
00:25:02.000 --> 00:25:07.759
sky blue and soft pink, the
abode of Gemini, two doses of poison

292
00:25:07.839 --> 00:25:11.920
and one pill. The smoke that
poured from the chimney let me know those

293
00:25:11.960 --> 00:25:17.720
that needed correcting were home, Sweet
home. I didn't stand on formality.

294
00:25:18.240 --> 00:25:22.599
The door exploded inward from the impact
of my left shit kicker, splinters spreading

295
00:25:22.640 --> 00:25:26.519
out like buckshot, acting as my
calling card. It took me a fraction

296
00:25:26.640 --> 00:25:30.759
of a second to realize no one
was visible in the room, magic eyewear

297
00:25:30.880 --> 00:25:34.519
or no. But I could smell
them just fine. Naturally, they didn't

298
00:25:34.559 --> 00:25:40.119
surprise me none when they exploded from
the shadows of the cabin ceiling. However,

299
00:25:40.319 --> 00:25:42.640
the fact that they could move together
like a great spider in their conjoined

300
00:25:42.680 --> 00:25:48.759
state definitely raised an eyebrow. I
unloaded my rifle with a thunderous roar.

301
00:25:48.880 --> 00:25:51.880
The shot tore a nice chunk of
whatever the lady side of this thing was

302
00:25:51.920 --> 00:25:55.680
called, But she wasn't going down
by a long shot. Before I knew

303
00:25:55.680 --> 00:25:57.759
it, the mail side of the
equation had maneuvered himself in such a way

304
00:25:57.799 --> 00:26:00.880
that he both knocked me to the
and managed to wrap the fleshy band that

305
00:26:02.000 --> 00:26:06.640
kept these two eternally bound around my
neck. That same bit of flesh began

306
00:26:06.720 --> 00:26:10.960
flexing and throbbing until I couldn't draw
a breath. The various veins and sinew

307
00:26:11.039 --> 00:26:15.240
contained under that warm sleeve pulsing like
a bag of snakes. Things began swirling

308
00:26:15.319 --> 00:26:19.519
and growing ever darker. That's when
I died for the first time. The

309
00:26:19.599 --> 00:26:25.640
shaman appeared shortly thereafter, though my
enemies never noticed, although if they did,

310
00:26:25.680 --> 00:26:29.799
I wager they'd have been confused as
all get out. See that fella

311
00:26:29.920 --> 00:26:34.119
simply strolled in, leaned low,
and whispered in my ear. He was

312
00:26:34.160 --> 00:26:37.839
a bone. I didn't quite gather
what he was on about, but it

313
00:26:37.880 --> 00:26:41.720
seemed like a question I should answer
in the affirmative. He reached into my

314
00:26:41.839 --> 00:26:45.559
rucksack, pulled out one of the
twelve bones of my boy that clattered inside,

315
00:26:45.559 --> 00:26:49.960
and shoved that room covered ivory femur
right in my mouth. It dissolved

316
00:26:49.960 --> 00:26:55.640
on contact with my tongue, and
I was back in business. I sat

317
00:26:55.759 --> 00:26:59.359
up, puked, and roared at
my killers, who had now sat down

318
00:26:59.400 --> 00:27:03.640
to a nice warm meal after their
deed was done. What I did next

319
00:27:03.680 --> 00:27:07.000
would become a bit of a legend. See, I grabbed the steak knife

320
00:27:07.039 --> 00:27:11.559
out of the hand of the twin
closest to me, who honestly didn't even

321
00:27:11.599 --> 00:27:15.200
resist, probably the shock of a
corpse interrupting his din din. Anyway,

322
00:27:15.440 --> 00:27:19.359
I took that blade and commenced to
slice that ribbon that held them together like

323
00:27:19.400 --> 00:27:25.279
a rabid wolf. But then I
had a pang of conscience. These two

324
00:27:25.400 --> 00:27:29.119
had been together since day one,
so it would be a shame to take

325
00:27:29.160 --> 00:27:33.720
that away from them. Fortunately I
learned to sew at a tender age.

326
00:27:33.799 --> 00:27:38.240
I can only imagine the look on
Gideon's face when he saw one or two,

327
00:27:38.559 --> 00:27:42.759
not sure how they counted themselves anyway, saw a member of his posse

328
00:27:42.920 --> 00:27:48.599
fixed mouth to crotch of their opposite
number, like those yin yang symbols the

329
00:27:48.680 --> 00:27:52.759
Chinese fellas out west were so fond
of. And imagine it would have to

330
00:27:52.799 --> 00:27:56.359
be as Once my work was done, I sunk into the earth outside the

331
00:27:56.400 --> 00:28:06.960
Gemini's doorstep, and there I slept
year, and so it went. At

332
00:28:06.960 --> 00:28:10.000
the very end of each and every
year, I'd rise up and put a

333
00:28:10.079 --> 00:28:15.720
murder on one of those psychos Pisces. Hard to breathe with concrete in your

334
00:28:15.759 --> 00:28:19.480
gills, Taurus, Let's just say
he wasn't just a bull from the shoulders

335
00:28:19.559 --> 00:28:23.599
up. But that would be his
undoing when I rammed that tally whacker straight

336
00:28:23.640 --> 00:28:30.559
down his throat. Aries Leo Cancer, Sagittarius, Virgo Libra, Capricorn Aquarius,

337
00:28:30.920 --> 00:28:37.640
dead dead dead dead dead dead dead
and double dead, don't ask.

338
00:28:37.640 --> 00:28:41.400
Year after year I fought, and
year after year I lost a little bit

339
00:28:41.400 --> 00:28:51.599
more of my boy. Peace by
peace. Finally I came to Scorpio.

340
00:28:52.160 --> 00:28:56.119
And if you think the other menagerie
made for a one of a kind corpse

341
00:28:56.160 --> 00:29:00.000
gallery, I can assure you all
that that final member of that gang,

342
00:29:00.680 --> 00:29:03.119
minus their ring master. But I'll
get to his arcane ass and a tick.

343
00:29:03.440 --> 00:29:07.240
See after the decade and change of
carnival exhibits i'd tussled with, I

344
00:29:07.279 --> 00:29:11.720
wouldn't blame you none. If you
wagered Scorpio would be some kind of insect

345
00:29:11.759 --> 00:29:15.319
man. But it wasn't Hell.
It wasn't even a man. As you

346
00:29:15.359 --> 00:29:19.160
could guess from the hiring of those
darling siblings I jawed about earlier. Gideon

347
00:29:19.240 --> 00:29:23.000
didn't give a single shit if those
that worked for him were men or women,

348
00:29:23.400 --> 00:29:26.480
A real rarity as far as evil
posses went. In the late eighteen

349
00:29:26.559 --> 00:29:30.400
hundreds. Of course, half those
motherfuckers would be a right challenge to even

350
00:29:30.400 --> 00:29:36.319
classify as human. When I sauntered
up to that gypsy wagon Lady Scorpio called

351
00:29:36.319 --> 00:29:38.200
home, I could just tell I
was in for a hell of a time.

352
00:29:38.599 --> 00:29:42.599
The scent of burning herbs filled the
air, and the roaring flame burning

353
00:29:42.680 --> 00:29:48.240
brightly beside the gaudy wagon was doing
a solid job of roasting a large pheasant.

354
00:29:48.799 --> 00:29:52.319
I hunkered down by the fire.
It always feels good to warm my

355
00:29:52.400 --> 00:29:56.200
hands after pointing my boots toward the
sky for twelve months. The lavender and

356
00:29:56.279 --> 00:30:00.759
crimson curtains that covered the entrance to
the wagon parted, and she appeared,

357
00:30:00.960 --> 00:30:04.680
a raven haired beauty with eyes as
cruel and cold then as a whole nest

358
00:30:04.680 --> 00:30:10.599
of vipers could possess. I told
guineaon doing your wife and boy was a

359
00:30:10.640 --> 00:30:15.359
grave mistake. Well, it's a
mistake that will surely put you in your

360
00:30:15.400 --> 00:30:18.720
grave, missy, she laughed,
and I had to admit it was an

361
00:30:18.799 --> 00:30:22.839
unbelievably delicate thing. If that is
to be my fate, there is little

362
00:30:22.880 --> 00:30:26.640
I can do to change it.
I spit at her feet. Yep,

363
00:30:27.759 --> 00:30:32.559
won't you come inside? A moment
it's your funeral. You can have it

364
00:30:32.599 --> 00:30:37.279
any way you want. I entered
the wagon and beheld the interior, which

365
00:30:37.319 --> 00:30:41.039
contained nothing save for an opulent bed. I sat down and waited for the

366
00:30:41.039 --> 00:30:45.079
show to start. She slid into
the bed beside me, pushed me down,

367
00:30:45.119 --> 00:30:48.799
and started to rub up against me, all feline like. I grabbed

368
00:30:48.799 --> 00:30:52.640
her hair, tugged it hard,
and whispered the most romantic thing I could

369
00:30:52.680 --> 00:30:57.319
think of into her ear. This
is for Lizabeth. I drove the blade

370
00:30:57.319 --> 00:31:00.160
of the hunting knife through the back
of her head before she could even realize

371
00:31:00.200 --> 00:31:03.480
I had pulled it from my left
boot. She made that weird gargle,

372
00:31:03.519 --> 00:31:07.559
whistling, exhale thing that you never
really got used to. Then the light

373
00:31:07.680 --> 00:31:14.480
in those big brown eyes went dim. Should have started with this one.

374
00:31:15.359 --> 00:31:18.559
I managed to remove my knife from
her skull and kick her ass right out

375
00:31:18.559 --> 00:31:22.640
of the wagon in a near seamless
movement. I heard her hit the ground

376
00:31:22.680 --> 00:31:27.759
and then splash her skin, flew
through the curtains and collided with the far

377
00:31:27.880 --> 00:31:32.799
wall of the wagon with a sickening
sound akin to pig inards being thrown at

378
00:31:32.799 --> 00:31:37.759
a whorehouse. Ah here we go, I said, as the giant scorpion

379
00:31:37.000 --> 00:31:42.079
clickety clacked through the entryway. The
odd thing about this here scorpion is it

380
00:31:42.119 --> 00:31:48.000
had a great set of breasts and
a tail equipped with a rather rainery looking

381
00:31:48.279 --> 00:31:52.000
cock where the poisonous sting should have
rested. I'm going to fuck you one

382
00:31:52.039 --> 00:31:56.400
way or another. Lover to be
spat from a mouthful of spear like teeth

383
00:31:56.440 --> 00:32:01.359
and bad intentions get in lines.
I drew my iron and unloaded on that

384
00:32:01.480 --> 00:32:06.519
nightmare with barrel of blazon. That
damn tail whipped at me again and again.

385
00:32:06.559 --> 00:32:08.920
His scorpio's face looked like a vat
of prize winning chili, and to

386
00:32:08.960 --> 00:32:13.960
my horror, the loads that appended
shot were some sort of vile acid.

387
00:32:14.759 --> 00:32:17.119
While the walls of the wagon began
to dissolve, the bitch stopped or bucking'

388
00:32:19.079 --> 00:32:22.680
Well, fuck me, silly,
I didn't die this go around. I

389
00:32:22.720 --> 00:32:27.000
wonder if I'll still take a dirt
nap yep, I said, as I

390
00:32:27.119 --> 00:32:32.200
folded into the cold earth for the
first time in years, I dreamed,

391
00:32:34.599 --> 00:32:39.400
I saw my family, The unspeakable
terror life had become the soul crushing scream

392
00:32:39.440 --> 00:32:44.079
into the abyss I'd make year after
year as I was reborn to put down

393
00:32:44.119 --> 00:32:47.880
one monster after another, and I
saw that burr lap headed bastard that had

394
00:32:47.880 --> 00:32:54.799
made this all so. And I
saw children, unfamiliar children with their faces

395
00:32:54.839 --> 00:33:00.240
tinted a glowing blue, the exact
same hue of which I had never seen

396
00:33:00.319 --> 00:33:07.440
the like of before. Guess what
day it is. That's right, the

397
00:33:07.519 --> 00:33:10.880
day I end the life of that
masked son of a bitch and finally rest

398
00:33:10.960 --> 00:33:16.200
in peace. That's the theory.
Anyway. The morning of New Year's Eve

399
00:33:16.880 --> 00:33:22.559
eighteen ninety nine, I had that
Jesus thought I mentioned at the start of

400
00:33:22.599 --> 00:33:27.400
this yarn, and I found myself
wandering the streets of old Manhattan Town,

401
00:33:27.759 --> 00:33:32.880
beastly bandages in place. Everything was
cold, gray until I got that unholy

402
00:33:34.000 --> 00:33:37.799
vision that Gideon was well and truly
a man about town, though he wore

403
00:33:37.839 --> 00:33:44.279
a false human face over his rough
mask. I followed him around a pace,

404
00:33:44.759 --> 00:33:47.319
but he seemed to make stops at
random, and although he made no

405
00:33:47.440 --> 00:33:52.799
indication that he knew I was there, I knew damn well he did.

406
00:33:53.480 --> 00:33:59.200
Finally he got the drop on me
after a rather well executed disappearing act in

407
00:33:59.279 --> 00:34:05.160
the Bowery. Let's retire to my
residence and talk this through a dead man,

408
00:34:05.680 --> 00:34:15.320
he purred, yep, I answered. We entered the luxurious townhouse Gideon

409
00:34:15.440 --> 00:34:21.360
called home. Please relax, Gideon
said, gesturing to an array of sofas

410
00:34:21.440 --> 00:34:25.119
and chairs that festooned his abode.
I took a load off on a nearby

411
00:34:25.199 --> 00:34:30.800
Persian rug. That furniture was doubtless
cursed and would spell my doom if I

412
00:34:30.920 --> 00:34:35.559
dare put my ass upon it.
Are you a gambling man, he asked?

413
00:34:36.199 --> 00:34:39.199
Not by nature, no I am, And if I had to play

414
00:34:39.199 --> 00:34:43.840
my hand, I would wager you
want to know why I chose you and

415
00:34:43.880 --> 00:34:47.119
your kin to slaughter. The thought
had crossed my mind a time or two.

416
00:34:47.719 --> 00:34:52.880
If I'm to be honest, I
answered, true, I had heard

417
00:34:52.880 --> 00:34:55.840
that if you do someone a cosmic
level injustice, like a random killing,

418
00:34:55.880 --> 00:35:00.519
for instance, then powerful magic is
revealed to those to travel a dark path.

419
00:35:01.480 --> 00:35:07.480
You heard rightly, he gestured toward
my rucksack. The magic my son,

420
00:35:08.639 --> 00:35:14.239
Your son became the rarest of magics. You should be kissing my feet

421
00:35:14.280 --> 00:35:20.519
for this gift. I see it
a tad different, I wager you do.

422
00:35:20.679 --> 00:35:23.519
Nevertheless, my theory was correct.
Nevertheless, you should have listened to

423
00:35:23.559 --> 00:35:28.760
your pet, bug Scorpio. She
was always the most in tune of my

424
00:35:28.920 --> 00:35:35.360
menagerie, was is the operative word? I care little that you killed any

425
00:35:35.360 --> 00:35:42.719
of those sideshow attractions. You're all
heart, No, I'm all business.

426
00:35:43.239 --> 00:35:47.639
How So I queried, Let's say
you give me that last bone in your

427
00:35:47.719 --> 00:35:51.760
sack, and I let you walk
out of here and live a long and

428
00:35:51.880 --> 00:35:58.280
happy life. Let's say I do. What does that give me? An

429
00:35:58.280 --> 00:36:02.639
eternity without those I love, those
you took from me. True, but

430
00:36:04.280 --> 00:36:07.519
a life is a life. I
thought on this a spell, and I

431
00:36:07.599 --> 00:36:14.280
had me a revelation. Hold on, you'll see fine, you want the

432
00:36:14.320 --> 00:36:19.199
bone? Here it is. I
removed my son's skull from the sack and

433
00:36:19.280 --> 00:36:23.400
held it up for that snake to
see. Glorious, Please let me hold

434
00:36:23.440 --> 00:36:29.760
it. The shaman spoke into my
ear for the last time. I nodded.

435
00:36:30.599 --> 00:36:34.280
I tossed my boy's skull to Gideon, and as that bone grew ever

436
00:36:34.400 --> 00:36:37.320
closer, I drew my pistol and
fired. The skull exploded when the bullet

437
00:36:37.400 --> 00:36:42.360
hit the bone. The shaman laughed. His Egyptian pal laughed. I laughed

438
00:36:42.519 --> 00:36:47.280
Gideon, however. Gideon, however, did most assuredly not laugh. The

439
00:36:47.320 --> 00:36:52.119
shards of the skull became missiles and
pierced Gideon's mask in one hundred razor sharp

440
00:36:52.199 --> 00:36:58.079
volleys. He did that gargle thing
and fell like a sack of potatos.

441
00:36:58.679 --> 00:37:04.119
That's that, then, I said, I waited for some sort of cosmic

442
00:37:04.159 --> 00:37:07.639
redemption. Would I stand before my
family once more? Would I finally be

443
00:37:07.679 --> 00:37:15.000
able to rest? A glowing letter
a appeared in the sky. A glowing

444
00:37:15.239 --> 00:37:21.719
s followed it, and another s
ass. Real cute, I thought,

445
00:37:22.239 --> 00:37:30.480
as I finally succumbed to the darkness. Brent laughed ass classic. Yeah,

446
00:37:30.519 --> 00:37:34.119
man, this game is so easy
if you have enough quarters. Todd said,

447
00:37:34.599 --> 00:37:37.760
I've beaten it like a hundred times. The duo walked away from the

448
00:37:37.800 --> 00:37:43.920
cabinet as the attract screen of Satan's
shotgun called out to the next player,

449
00:37:44.519 --> 00:38:01.039
and Elizabeth and Lazarus died anew a
few Cold Ones by David o'han. The

450
00:38:01.159 --> 00:38:06.679
man stood alone in the parking lot, watching a chip bag roll like a

451
00:38:06.719 --> 00:38:13.039
tumbleweed across the asphalt. The abandoned
kmart no longer held any of its corporate

452
00:38:13.079 --> 00:38:17.800
branding. The moss and mildew speckled
bricks were covered in graffiti and the windows

453
00:38:17.840 --> 00:38:23.000
glazed over with years of grime.
The man pulled his gown up in a

454
00:38:23.000 --> 00:38:30.719
bunch and aimed at the graffiti,
relieving himself between a proclamation of love and

455
00:38:30.800 --> 00:38:36.480
a smiley face. The stream slapped
against the brickwork and splattered the toes of

456
00:38:36.519 --> 00:38:42.320
his filthy hospital slippers. He groaned. He needed to get real clothes if

457
00:38:42.320 --> 00:38:47.360
he was going to enjoy his self
awarded release from the Cerletti Institute. Kmart

458
00:38:47.360 --> 00:38:52.280
had always been his favorite store.
The long shifts at the poultry plant sapped

459
00:38:52.320 --> 00:38:58.400
most of the joy from his life. Then he discovered this particular store.

460
00:38:59.360 --> 00:39:02.239
Every sun he set the tone for
the week by coming in to get all

461
00:39:02.280 --> 00:39:09.880
his essentials, enjoy the hospitality,
and visit with the employees, especially Diane.

462
00:39:12.079 --> 00:39:15.320
He scratched at the fat scar between
the silver waves of hair. He

463
00:39:15.360 --> 00:39:22.159
would never forget his first love.
He was sure she hadn't forgotten him.

464
00:39:22.280 --> 00:39:29.000
He'd see if he could find her
once he got himself together. Whispers from

465
00:39:29.000 --> 00:39:32.639
inside snapped his mind back to the
present and curled his lips in a malevolent

466
00:39:32.719 --> 00:39:37.800
smile that spread like a tearing wound. He leaned his face close to a

467
00:39:37.840 --> 00:39:44.400
fist size hole in the window.
Nothing was stirring between the leftover shelves and

468
00:39:44.519 --> 00:39:50.159
racks. A camera flash lit a
corner of the store. The sudden illumination

469
00:39:50.320 --> 00:39:54.840
left dots flickering in his vision,
but for the briefest moment he saw the

470
00:39:54.880 --> 00:40:01.039
two urban explorers reflected in a spider
webbed mirror. He covered his mouth to

471
00:40:01.159 --> 00:40:07.800
hide his giggling. Kmart was still
the best place to do his shopping.

472
00:40:10.519 --> 00:40:15.159
Brew Year's Eve is about more than
just busty beer wenches and dollar pints,

473
00:40:15.840 --> 00:40:20.440
Darren said, with a swing of
his arm that splashed beer from his glass

474
00:40:20.840 --> 00:40:24.039
and onto his shoes. It's about
the resilience of the American people in the

475
00:40:24.079 --> 00:40:30.880
face of puritanical religious fervor. Maggie
Mills rolled her eyes. It's about getting

476
00:40:30.960 --> 00:40:36.119
drunk off your ass at the Florida
Georgia Line and belching your ABC's with the

477
00:40:36.159 --> 00:40:40.480
other Neanderthals. I can make it
all the way to oh Darren chortled.

478
00:40:42.559 --> 00:40:47.880
Brew Year's Eve was Oklahoma's largest beer
festival. It's exponential growth and one of

479
00:40:47.920 --> 00:40:54.280
a kind setting attracted beer connoisseurs from
across the country. Three thousand attendees meandered

480
00:40:54.280 --> 00:41:00.000
the grounds of the Old Springer Hotel. Short bursts of fireworks detonated overhead every

481
00:41:00.079 --> 00:41:06.760
hour in a countdown to the new
year. Local bands cycled on and off

482
00:41:06.840 --> 00:41:09.760
the grand stage to the east of
the building to get the crowd fired up

483
00:41:09.960 --> 00:41:15.559
for the headliners. How Love Rocket
was still riding. The success of their

484
00:41:15.639 --> 00:41:21.599
nineteen eighty six hit Sweet Cream was
anyone's guess, but their appearance added another

485
00:41:21.719 --> 00:41:28.519
fifty dollars to the already steep admission
price. Vendor tents lined the manicured western

486
00:41:28.639 --> 00:41:32.519
yard with an assortment of wares that
rivaled most malls. On the south lawn,

487
00:41:32.599 --> 00:41:37.599
party goers gambled on carnival games for
a chance to win cash and prizes.

488
00:41:38.360 --> 00:41:43.280
The northern sprawl directly in front of
the hotel was a smoky haze of

489
00:41:43.679 --> 00:41:47.599
mingling scents from the rows of food
trucks and between them and the entrance.

490
00:41:47.920 --> 00:41:54.000
The hotel's ornate fountain featured Poseidon rising
from a tower of logger, spewing sea

491
00:41:54.039 --> 00:41:59.840
life, with his trident thrusting into
the sky. Beneath the watchful eye of

492
00:42:00.119 --> 00:42:07.280
stained glass rose windows six stories overhead, two hundred scantily clad serving girls gracefully

493
00:42:07.320 --> 00:42:13.440
prowled through the sea of people with
trays of beer, and then quickly sprinted

494
00:42:13.519 --> 00:42:17.320
back to the dressing room to empty
the tips from their haltertops before making another

495
00:42:17.440 --> 00:42:22.880
round. Look around you, Maggie, this is historical. Darren spread his

496
00:42:23.079 --> 00:42:29.559
arms wide. At the backdrop of
the once lavish hotel. A vinyl banner

497
00:42:29.639 --> 00:42:35.079
fluttered in the chill breeze over its
doors. Happy brew Year from Okay Brewing.

498
00:42:35.719 --> 00:42:40.800
The name's okay, but the beer
is legendary. Darren's right for once.

499
00:42:42.480 --> 00:42:46.400
Maggie's boyfriend Carlton put an arm around
her waist. These guys did something

500
00:42:46.480 --> 00:42:52.639
really amazing here? Is that?
So? Maggie held his chin in place

501
00:42:52.679 --> 00:42:57.159
as one of the wenches bounced past
them. And what could be more amazing

502
00:42:57.199 --> 00:43:01.800
than all this cleavage and cheap beer? Maggie's best friend and Darren's girlfriend,

503
00:43:02.039 --> 00:43:07.000
Karen, giggled. We're in the
Springer Hotel, Darren said, matter of

504
00:43:07.000 --> 00:43:14.639
factly. Maggie shrugged, and Carlton
held up a finger. How about I

505
00:43:14.800 --> 00:43:19.920
show you? The other three followed
him through the crowd. They rounded the

506
00:43:19.920 --> 00:43:22.960
beer fountain and went to the main
entrance, where Carlton slapped the brickwork.

507
00:43:23.679 --> 00:43:30.039
A series of pock marks dotted the
facade beside a bronze plaque emblazoned with the

508
00:43:30.159 --> 00:43:36.840
name. Carlton pointed to the food
vendors. On this night in nineteen thirty

509
00:43:36.880 --> 00:43:42.320
one, sixty prohibition agents, led
by two gun Heart pulled up where those

510
00:43:42.400 --> 00:43:47.440
trucks are now, he said,
The Springer Hotel refused to acknowledge prohibition.

511
00:43:49.159 --> 00:43:52.960
Everyone knew it, but no one
wanted to risk the wrath of feral Springer.

512
00:43:53.480 --> 00:43:59.719
But Hart was al Capone's big brother. Darren interrupted, and brass balls

513
00:44:00.519 --> 00:44:06.880
genetic. So what happened? Karen
moved closer to hear over the crowd.

514
00:44:07.760 --> 00:44:10.800
Farrell stepped out the front door and
shouted, if you're coming in, it's

515
00:44:10.880 --> 00:44:15.519
drinks for a dollar or lead for
free. Carlton whipped his hand up with

516
00:44:15.599 --> 00:44:21.119
his fingers, making a gun,
and then he fired a single shot,

517
00:44:21.480 --> 00:44:25.679
taking the hat right off Heart's head. Maggie poked a finger into a bullet

518
00:44:25.679 --> 00:44:32.480
hole and they returned fire. Boy
did they, Darren said. The barrage

519
00:44:32.559 --> 00:44:38.000
killed Farrell and three bystanders in the
lobby. The guests started pulling guns and

520
00:44:38.039 --> 00:44:43.880
the hotel became a battleground. Carlton
jerked his head to the door and they

521
00:44:43.920 --> 00:44:49.559
continued inside. Nine people died in
the shootout and a store of Moonshine caught

522
00:44:49.639 --> 00:44:53.960
fire, killing six more and destroying
the west wing. It was the largest

523
00:44:53.960 --> 00:45:01.119
mass killing in the history of Carpenter
County. Darren added, Otis Kilgore's Christmas

524
00:45:01.199 --> 00:45:06.760
party only missed the mark by one. Carlton said with a snicker. He

525
00:45:06.880 --> 00:45:10.840
snapped his fingers and smiled wide.
Did you hear Netflix is doing a movie

526
00:45:10.880 --> 00:45:15.039
about Otis? I hope they get
Kevin Smith to play him. Carlton laughed,

527
00:45:15.480 --> 00:45:21.400
that'd be a riot. My babysitter
used to tell me Otis would come

528
00:45:21.440 --> 00:45:25.199
and get me if I didn't listen
to her. Karen mused, who tells

529
00:45:25.239 --> 00:45:31.039
a six year old that most of
the babysitters in Ittawa? Darren shrugged.

530
00:45:31.639 --> 00:45:38.199
Maggie sneered and nodded in agreement,
remembering her own sitter's warnings. The couples

531
00:45:38.280 --> 00:45:43.880
made their way through the lobby and
up the wide staircase between its hand carved

532
00:45:43.960 --> 00:45:49.000
rails. In ninety three, Oka
bought the hotel and started restoring it for

533
00:45:49.039 --> 00:45:52.960
their headquarters as a slap in the
face to the prohibition days. The top

534
00:45:52.960 --> 00:45:57.920
two floors make up their offices,
and they built their brewing facility on the

535
00:45:58.000 --> 00:46:01.280
ruins of the west wing. Carlton
laughed, you can't tell me that's not

536
00:46:01.400 --> 00:46:07.599
the coolest story in the world.
Maggie leaned on the banister and watched the

537
00:46:07.679 --> 00:46:12.760
crowd in the lobby. What about
the other three floors haunted as shit?

538
00:46:13.320 --> 00:46:16.239
Darren chugged the rest of his beer
and whistled for a server. Yep,

539
00:46:16.639 --> 00:46:22.079
Carlton added, They renovated the rooms
and rent them out as a tourist attraction.

540
00:46:22.800 --> 00:46:29.280
Everyone that's ever stayed here claims they
saw weird things. Maggie lifted the

541
00:46:29.320 --> 00:46:34.000
festival pass hanging from the lanyard around
her neck with a room key, and

542
00:46:34.119 --> 00:46:38.280
we're spending the night with the ghosts
and the drunks. What could go wrong?

543
00:46:39.199 --> 00:46:45.519
A maniacal shrill guffaw answered, and
Carlton spun in a start. His

544
00:46:45.679 --> 00:46:50.119
hand swiped the glass from the giggling
guest's hand on accident, and splashed the

545
00:46:50.159 --> 00:46:54.920
contents across Karen's blouse. The sheer
material clung to her, revealing the bare

546
00:46:55.000 --> 00:47:00.679
breasts beneath. She screamed at the
icy shock of ip and then covered up

547
00:47:00.719 --> 00:47:07.920
in embarrassment. Her free hand slapped
the partygoer's cheek on reflex The wide grin

548
00:47:07.039 --> 00:47:12.760
melted from the man's weathered face as
the red handprint formed in its stead.

549
00:47:13.480 --> 00:47:16.599
He picked up the plastic pint glass
from the floor and twisted it between his

550
00:47:16.719 --> 00:47:22.639
fingers, Glaring at Karen, threw
it. He pressed the rim into Carlton's

551
00:47:22.719 --> 00:47:28.400
chest. Ain't that something? Not
even a crack? He giggled again,

552
00:47:28.440 --> 00:47:32.719
in a pitch that betrayed his stocky
build. Yeah, lots of new things

553
00:47:32.719 --> 00:47:37.400
in the world. Huh, Carlton
cleared his throat. Seriously, sorry about

554
00:47:37.440 --> 00:47:43.360
that, though, No sense crying
over spilled hooch, the man said with

555
00:47:43.440 --> 00:47:47.000
a chuckle, before turning to Karen. And you shouldn't be so quick to

556
00:47:47.079 --> 00:47:52.199
hide such wonderful tits. At least
let an old man earn the smack he

557
00:47:52.320 --> 00:47:57.840
gave him. He licked his plump
lips. What the fuck did you say?

558
00:47:58.360 --> 00:48:00.519
Darren grabbed the back of the man's
and slung him to the wall.

559
00:48:01.119 --> 00:48:06.800
Darren, take it easy, Carlton
called out. He took a step forward,

560
00:48:06.920 --> 00:48:12.159
fists clenched and ready to defend Karen's
honor, when a walking refrigerator whisked

561
00:48:12.159 --> 00:48:15.599
between them like a leaf on a
breeze. Darren's face bounced off a muscular

562
00:48:15.719 --> 00:48:21.400
chest. The security guard glared down
at Darren and growled for him to be

563
00:48:21.599 --> 00:48:25.400
cool. That high pitched giggle pierced
the crowd again, and the guard turned

564
00:48:25.440 --> 00:48:30.920
to give the man the same warning. The goliath pressed his finger into the

565
00:48:30.960 --> 00:48:35.760
man's chest. I don't see a
pass around your neck, he grumbled.

566
00:48:36.239 --> 00:48:39.519
The man giggled again and made a
show of padding down his own torso.

567
00:48:40.320 --> 00:48:45.639
I seem to have set it down
somewhere, he scratched at the barrens stretch

568
00:48:45.639 --> 00:48:50.039
of flesh where the scar created a
second part in his hair. I'll bet

569
00:48:50.079 --> 00:48:52.440
I left it in the restroom,
if you'd like to escort me to retrieve

570
00:48:52.440 --> 00:48:57.800
it. The security guard clamped his
hand on the back of Giggle's neck and

571
00:48:57.920 --> 00:49:01.320
led him away. I think I'll
do just that, pal, What in

572
00:49:01.400 --> 00:49:07.400
the actual fuck? Darren shook his
head, just some harmless old goon.

573
00:49:07.920 --> 00:49:10.599
Carlton said, come on, Karen, let's go to your room and get

574
00:49:10.599 --> 00:49:15.079
you cleaned up. Maggie hooked her
arm through Karen's and turned to Carlton.

575
00:49:15.559 --> 00:49:20.239
She kissed his cheek. We'll meet
you two at the bar. I came

576
00:49:20.280 --> 00:49:22.360
for the fireworks, not to watch
you too get into a drunken brawl.

577
00:49:23.039 --> 00:49:34.840
Behave you sure this is the bathroom
you used? The guard grunted, Oh,

578
00:49:34.920 --> 00:49:37.360
yes, I'm positive of it.
The man smoothed his hair in the

579
00:49:37.360 --> 00:49:42.159
mirror. I suppose it's possible I
left it in my room. However,

580
00:49:43.199 --> 00:49:46.679
what's your name? The guard unclipped
his radio. I'll go have someone check

581
00:49:46.719 --> 00:49:52.039
for it. The man chewed his
bottom lip, tittering excitedly. The hell

582
00:49:52.119 --> 00:49:57.960
is your deal? Man? Ain't
nothing funny about that. My name's Otis,

583
00:49:58.519 --> 00:50:01.559
he cackled. Suddenly make the guard
jump. He tucked his hands in

584
00:50:01.599 --> 00:50:06.920
his pockets and looked around the bathroom. Can you stop being creepy as shit

585
00:50:07.000 --> 00:50:12.800
long enough to tell me your last
name too? It's kill Gore? Otis,

586
00:50:12.880 --> 00:50:16.360
kill Gore? Otis straightened up,
all right, Otis. The guard

587
00:50:16.440 --> 00:50:22.480
raised the radio and paused, Hey, wasn't that the guy that killed all?

588
00:50:23.280 --> 00:50:27.840
The blade jabbed into the crevice of
his hip, and then glided up

589
00:50:27.880 --> 00:50:30.840
his body and threw the thick cords
of his neck. Otis pumped the pocket

590
00:50:30.920 --> 00:50:36.719
knife into his kidney and lung before
the giant batted him away. Otis crashed

591
00:50:36.719 --> 00:50:40.559
through the stall door and landed on
a toilet. The guard stomped toward Otis,

592
00:50:40.639 --> 00:50:45.679
who tapped his feet gleefully. The
behemoth slipped in the arterial blood cascading

593
00:50:45.719 --> 00:50:52.480
down his body and crashed to his
knees. ODIs stood and stroked the man's

594
00:50:52.559 --> 00:50:59.679
cheek. Pardon my amusement, ODIs
chuckled. But you can't have slaughter without

595
00:51:00.159 --> 00:51:05.039
laughter. He jammed the knife through
the guard's ear and tipped him over.

596
00:51:05.760 --> 00:51:10.000
He snorted in an attempt to suppress
a burst of excitement. ODIs bent and

597
00:51:10.039 --> 00:51:15.639
retrieved the radio from the man's belt. He pressed the call button. I

598
00:51:15.679 --> 00:51:22.480
need a room check on a rowdy
guest. He wheezed ten four. What's

599
00:51:22.519 --> 00:51:27.119
the name? A voice answered,
I'm afraid I didn't catch the last name

600
00:51:27.159 --> 00:51:31.920
with all the commotion, ODIs said, I heard his buddy call him Darren.

601
00:51:34.119 --> 00:51:37.920
A long moment of silence followed before
the voice came back, looks like

602
00:51:37.960 --> 00:51:43.360
we got a Darren Hildebrand in three
zero three? Say who is this?

603
00:51:43.880 --> 00:51:52.480
I don't recognize the voice, Otis
giggled, Can you believe that asshole?

604
00:51:53.159 --> 00:51:58.440
Karen pressed a cigarette between her lips. Have you got a light? Darren

605
00:51:58.519 --> 00:52:02.360
insists on lighting them for me.
Maggie looked beside her to the crystal ashtray

606
00:52:02.400 --> 00:52:08.199
on the dresser and collected the book
of matches bearing the Okay Brewing logo compliments

607
00:52:08.199 --> 00:52:13.440
of the house. She broke one
off and struck it. Karen puffed the

608
00:52:13.440 --> 00:52:17.480
cigarette to life, holding her soaked
blouse up for examination before dropping it into

609
00:52:17.480 --> 00:52:22.519
the trash can. She blew smoke
from the corner of her mouth. It

610
00:52:22.519 --> 00:52:27.400
had probably stained before we got home
anyhow. Maggie tucked the matches into her

611
00:52:27.480 --> 00:52:30.800
genes. The only thing I love
more than your thriftiness is your modesty.

612
00:52:31.400 --> 00:52:37.239
Want to put your boobs away now, Karen pressed them together. Jealous much,

613
00:52:37.679 --> 00:52:42.800
Maggie man chest? She laughed,
then realized the high school nickname still

614
00:52:42.840 --> 00:52:49.960
struck a nerve. Sorry Mags,
no biggie. Maggie stood and stretched and

615
00:52:50.559 --> 00:52:55.039
flicked Karen's nipple. Ouch. Karen
covered up and retrieved her suitcase. Fine,

616
00:52:55.079 --> 00:53:00.360
I'll put them away, you salty
bitch. You enjoyed it, Maggie

617
00:53:00.440 --> 00:53:04.559
winked and collected the cigarette. Hurry
up, we need to babysit the boys

618
00:53:04.599 --> 00:53:07.760
before they do something stupid. Karen
slipped on a new shirt and buttoned it

619
00:53:07.840 --> 00:53:12.840
quickly. You don't think that creepy
old man will bother us again, do

620
00:53:12.960 --> 00:53:16.559
you between booze and dementia, he
probably won't realize he's met us. Before

621
00:53:17.280 --> 00:53:22.800
Maggie opened the door and waved for
her to follow, Karen grabbed her lanyard

622
00:53:22.840 --> 00:53:27.199
and tossed it over her neck before
rushing to catch up. I'm just worried,

623
00:53:27.320 --> 00:53:30.679
is all, Karen said as she
struggled with a few more buttons before

624
00:53:30.719 --> 00:53:34.840
giving up. If she showed enough
cleavage, someone might mistake her for a

625
00:53:34.920 --> 00:53:38.760
beer wench and tip her at least. Oh shit, what now? Maggie

626
00:53:38.840 --> 00:53:44.800
rolled her eyes. I forgot my
clutch. Karen smacked Maggie's ass. Keep

627
00:53:44.840 --> 00:53:47.719
the guys at the bar and I'll
be right down. Karen twisted the antique

628
00:53:47.760 --> 00:53:52.159
key in the lock and stepped into
the room. The handbag was waiting on

629
00:53:52.199 --> 00:53:57.360
the edge of the dresser. Her
eyes flicked on the stains on the carpet,

630
00:53:57.719 --> 00:54:01.960
ruddy footprints that turned to a tight
sir. Her lip quivered and the

631
00:54:02.000 --> 00:54:08.000
cigarette fell away. The realization hit
her a moment before the door slammed shut

632
00:54:08.199 --> 00:54:14.280
and the hand clamped over her mouth. You're not as pretty as my last

633
00:54:14.320 --> 00:54:19.920
girlfriend, ODIs hissed over her shoulder. Wet steel lifted the blouse from her

634
00:54:19.920 --> 00:54:24.079
skin. But I bet you're beautiful
on the inside, she screamed into his

635
00:54:24.159 --> 00:54:30.480
palm. As the blade sank in
ODIs shrieked with laughter and slid the knife

636
00:54:30.559 --> 00:54:37.480
down, separating buttons and flesh.
Karen squirmed for freedom, emptying her torso

637
00:54:37.039 --> 00:54:47.519
that much quicker? What's taking Karen
so long? Carlton checked his watch again.

638
00:54:49.280 --> 00:54:52.639
A screaming guest cut off any reply. The trio ran toward the commotion.

639
00:54:53.159 --> 00:54:58.400
A man vomited in the hall,
while another sobbed against the chevrond wallpaper.

640
00:54:59.079 --> 00:55:01.679
A guard pushed it his way into
the bathroom and shouted profanities at his

641
00:55:01.760 --> 00:55:07.239
discovery. Maggie nudged through the crowd
for a better look. The bloodpool told

642
00:55:07.280 --> 00:55:13.239
her to stop, but she leaned
into the bathroom further and saw the corpse

643
00:55:13.280 --> 00:55:17.480
sprawled on the tile. She slapped
a hand over her mouth and ran back

644
00:55:17.519 --> 00:55:24.039
to the guys. That guard from
earlier, she whimpered, he's been killed.

645
00:55:24.880 --> 00:55:29.280
Let's go get Karen and get the
fuck out of here, Darren said.

646
00:55:29.840 --> 00:55:32.159
They made their way to the staircase
when a serving girl wiggled to them

647
00:55:32.199 --> 00:55:37.239
with a gift bag in her hand. Are you, Darren, she asked.

648
00:55:37.159 --> 00:55:42.599
Darren nodded. She held up the
bag. Some old guy gave me

649
00:55:42.639 --> 00:55:45.760
twenty bucks to bring this to you, he said. It was an apology

650
00:55:45.800 --> 00:55:49.920
for earlier. She handed over the
bag and waited around for a tip.

651
00:55:50.599 --> 00:55:54.719
When it was clear there wasn't one, she huffed and scampered off. Darren

652
00:55:54.760 --> 00:55:59.639
looked around the crowd for the man. Y'all go get Karen and I'll wait

653
00:55:59.679 --> 00:56:02.119
here. That sick fuck said he
was going to the bathroom. Remember.

654
00:56:04.079 --> 00:56:07.760
Maggie tugged Carlton's arm. They made
it to the landing when Darren shrieked and

655
00:56:07.800 --> 00:56:13.079
fell to his knees. The couple
ran back down, and Carlton threw an

656
00:56:13.199 --> 00:56:19.679
arm around his friend. What happened. Maggie picked up the bag and looked

657
00:56:19.719 --> 00:56:29.119
inside, immediately dropping it and turning
to puke Jesus. Carlton whispered. The

658
00:56:29.199 --> 00:56:35.039
tipped bag spilled its contents on the
floor before them. Carlton's eyes locked onto

659
00:56:35.039 --> 00:56:39.239
the severed breasts. He slid away
from them and tried to stand before fainting

660
00:56:39.280 --> 00:56:44.360
at the foot of the stairs.
Maggie wiped her mouth on her sleeve in

661
00:56:44.440 --> 00:56:50.000
time to see Darren storming up the
staircase. I'm coming, motherfucker, he

662
00:56:50.119 --> 00:56:54.320
shouted. I'm going to tear your
goddamn heart out. More people were pushing

663
00:56:54.360 --> 00:56:59.079
down the hall to see what the
commotion was, and more screams echoed out

664
00:56:59.079 --> 00:57:05.039
of the bathroom When they found out
someone pulled a fire alarm. The clackson

665
00:57:05.199 --> 00:57:09.599
sounded with staccato bursts of strobe lights. The squeaking wheels of an antiquated luggage

666
00:57:09.639 --> 00:57:15.599
cart was barely audible over the ruckus. Maggie watched the crowd split between those

667
00:57:15.679 --> 00:57:19.400
running for their lives and the ones
that were waiting their turn to see the

668
00:57:19.440 --> 00:57:22.480
dead guy. A giggle sent a
shiver up her spine. Right before the

669
00:57:22.519 --> 00:57:29.800
blow landed. She slumped to the
floor, fighting unconsciousness. The old man

670
00:57:30.000 --> 00:57:34.719
smiled over her as he hefted her
onto the cart. Another buffed up hulk

671
00:57:34.760 --> 00:57:37.920
in a security T shirt grabbed the
lunatic's shoulder. What's going on here?

672
00:57:38.239 --> 00:57:43.559
Don't you hear the fire alarm?
He barked. The old timer giggled,

673
00:57:44.440 --> 00:57:49.079
kids these days, he gestured to
Maggie. They can't hold their hooch.

674
00:57:49.679 --> 00:57:52.480
Just loading my nephew and his girlfriend
up to get them out of here.

675
00:57:52.559 --> 00:57:58.559
Quicker, sir, good plan the
guard hired for his imposing size and not

676
00:57:58.719 --> 00:58:01.280
his intellect. Slash up the man's
arm, hurry up and get them to

677
00:58:01.320 --> 00:58:14.119
the lawn. Yes, sir,
Maggie blinked twice and then blacked out.

678
00:58:15.000 --> 00:58:22.400
Maggie's eyes flicked open and closed until
vision edged fuzzily from the abyss of unconsciousness.

679
00:58:22.199 --> 00:58:27.920
The world around her was a kaleidoscope
of swimming colors and dancing lights.

680
00:58:28.840 --> 00:58:32.559
Someone had shut off the fire alarm, and far away, the first responder's

681
00:58:32.639 --> 00:58:39.199
sirens were caterwauling down the country roads
to the Springer Hotel. The spotlights outside

682
00:58:39.239 --> 00:58:45.000
continued their dance across the facade of
the hotel and brought the twelve foot tall

683
00:58:45.079 --> 00:58:51.440
stained glass rose window into focus.
Maggie slowly became aware of the plush leather

684
00:58:51.559 --> 00:58:55.760
chair cushioning her body, and then
the cords that bound her to it by

685
00:58:55.800 --> 00:59:01.480
the wrists. She turned the chair
to take in her surroundings. Across the

686
00:59:01.639 --> 00:59:07.559
ornate desk, Darren was strapped to
another less expensive chair in a similar fashion,

687
00:59:08.039 --> 00:59:14.599
only he was stark nude. His
mauled, bloody nose told her he'd

688
00:59:14.639 --> 00:59:19.480
gone down just as painful as she
did OK. Brewing ads were framed on

689
00:59:19.519 --> 00:59:24.079
the wood paneled walls, and shelves
held industry awards in commemorative bottles. In

690
00:59:24.159 --> 00:59:29.440
the center of the room was a
pedestal with a glass case atop and a

691
00:59:29.480 --> 00:59:34.400
mason jar inside on a decorative pillow. Their captor was nowhere to be seen

692
00:59:34.519 --> 00:59:39.320
in the vast office, where Maggie
cleared her throat and tried, again,

693
00:59:40.320 --> 00:59:46.480
where are we? Darren sniffled the
CEO's office. I recognize it from the

694
00:59:46.519 --> 00:59:52.960
brochure. Did you find Karen?
Maggie braced herself, already knowing the answer.

695
00:59:53.039 --> 01:00:00.920
Is she really gone? He butchered
her. Darren broke down, crying

696
01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:07.159
loudly and struggling against his bonds.
He cut her to pieces. Maggie sh

697
01:00:07.760 --> 01:00:10.599
Maggie hissed, you have to keep
it down. We don't know how far

698
01:00:10.679 --> 01:00:16.840
he's gone. He could hear you. I'm I'm sorry. Darren choked on

699
01:00:16.880 --> 01:00:22.360
the words. The police, they're
coming. They've got to be. Maggie

700
01:00:22.360 --> 01:00:28.360
pushed her chair along the carpet.
Yeah, to investigate a murder, not

701
01:00:28.519 --> 01:00:32.480
to rescue us. They won't even
have a head count until tomorrow. She

702
01:00:32.639 --> 01:00:37.800
rounded the desk and rolled closer to
Darren. Untimey, Darren wiggled his hand

703
01:00:37.880 --> 01:00:42.360
until he got his fingers on the
knot that held her left arm in place.

704
01:00:43.440 --> 01:00:47.880
Maybe Carlton will tell them we're missing
and they'll come find us. Maybe

705
01:00:49.000 --> 01:00:53.679
she scanned the room for her boyfriend. The hazy memory of her capture replayed

706
01:00:53.679 --> 01:00:59.920
in the back of her mind.
Maybe Carlton woke up and ran, or

707
01:01:00.159 --> 01:01:05.960
maybe he woke up and got himself
killed. Her attacker's words came back to

708
01:01:06.000 --> 01:01:09.400
her slowly, like letters floating in
a bowl of alphabet soup, until they

709
01:01:09.440 --> 01:01:15.639
made a sentence again. Keep working
the knot, she whispered. The door

710
01:01:15.800 --> 01:01:21.079
swung open, and the old man
entered with a skip. Oh goody,

711
01:01:21.760 --> 01:01:27.360
you're awake. He giggled excitedly and
grabbed the back of Maggie's chair. Darren

712
01:01:27.400 --> 01:01:30.559
tugged the knot hard until the man
wheeled her away and tore the cord from

713
01:01:30.599 --> 01:01:35.760
his fingers. The man parked Maggie
next to the desk and opened one of

714
01:01:35.800 --> 01:01:39.119
the drawers. He clicked on the
vintage lamp to rifle through the contents until

715
01:01:39.119 --> 01:01:46.000
he squealed happily. The shears gleamed
in the dim amber light. These will

716
01:01:46.039 --> 01:01:51.960
do just fine. He stroked Maggie's
cheek with the point and then went for

717
01:01:52.079 --> 01:01:54.920
Darren. I was afraid you two
would sleep right through the big moment.

718
01:01:55.800 --> 01:02:01.119
It's almost midnight, the blackout.
At the aside, Maggie swiveled her chair

719
01:02:01.199 --> 01:02:05.920
slightly. Darren had made some slack
in the knot, and she rolled her

720
01:02:05.920 --> 01:02:09.280
wrists slowly to loosen it further.
I saw it on the news a few

721
01:02:09.320 --> 01:02:14.440
days ago. They said there were
too many bodies to tell if anyone escaped.

722
01:02:15.159 --> 01:02:20.679
But you did, didn't you.
You set that many creative free spirits

723
01:02:20.719 --> 01:02:23.760
loose in one place, and things
are bound to get interesting, the man

724
01:02:23.880 --> 01:02:29.119
said, with a gentle tittering.
The blackout was a gift from God,

725
01:02:29.639 --> 01:02:37.440
and one should never refuse a gift. So Maggie tugged softly to see if

726
01:02:37.440 --> 01:02:43.000
she could squeeze out who are you? Why you're right? I feel like

727
01:02:43.039 --> 01:02:46.599
I've known you so long that I
plan forgot to introduce myself. He knelt

728
01:02:46.599 --> 01:02:51.880
on the floor in front of Darren
and tapped his fingers on his captive's knee.

729
01:02:52.400 --> 01:02:55.920
A watch alarm beaped in the hallway. Maggie let her head hang and

730
01:02:55.960 --> 01:03:00.840
bit her lip when the door started
to open. She kept her eyes closed

731
01:03:00.840 --> 01:03:08.320
as she raised her head and hoped
she was wrong. She wasn't. The

732
01:03:08.360 --> 01:03:12.920
cops will be here in a few
minutes, Carlton said, we don't really

733
01:03:12.960 --> 01:03:16.079
have time for this, Uncle Otis, you should never rush a celebration,

734
01:03:16.320 --> 01:03:23.159
carl carl nodded anxiously. That's true. I suppose we can take the bootlegger

735
01:03:23.159 --> 01:03:27.960
tunnel in the basement all the way
to the fireworks bunker. There's an electric

736
01:03:28.000 --> 01:03:31.199
cart there, no sound, and
a four hour battery. There's a farm

737
01:03:31.239 --> 01:03:35.360
a few miles away. By the
time the cops search, this place will

738
01:03:35.400 --> 01:03:38.440
be free and clear. But we
need to go soon, of course,

739
01:03:38.599 --> 01:03:45.119
my dear boy, but it's not
really New Year's. He slid the chrome

740
01:03:45.239 --> 01:03:54.079
blades around darren scrotum until the ball
drops. The giggling disappeared in the wave

741
01:03:54.159 --> 01:04:00.079
of Darren's frantic screams. As the
scissors closed slowly on the rain flesh,

742
01:04:00.320 --> 01:04:04.119
Maggie jerked her arm free while her
psycho boyfriend laughed it up with his long

743
01:04:04.159 --> 01:04:08.639
lost uncle. She worked the knot
on her other hand and freed herself.

744
01:04:08.639 --> 01:04:13.400
As Darren's cries turned sharper, The
glands plopped on the shag carpet, and

745
01:04:13.480 --> 01:04:17.280
his head lulled. Maggie launched herself
from the chair, snatching a trophy from

746
01:04:17.320 --> 01:04:21.119
the desk, Adorned with a gold
plated beer keg. The ornament twinkled on

747
01:04:21.199 --> 01:04:27.800
its arching path toward Carlton. The
stone bass stamped a dent into his forehead,

748
01:04:27.960 --> 01:04:30.519
and a back swing snapped the keg
off and sent it and a few

749
01:04:30.559 --> 01:04:35.679
teeth through the glass case. Resting
on the pedestal, Otis buried the shears

750
01:04:35.679 --> 01:04:42.880
into Maggie's thigh. She cried out
and collapsed beside him. The madman straddled

751
01:04:42.880 --> 01:04:46.280
her, squeezing her throat with his
free hand and leaning close. His hot,

752
01:04:46.599 --> 01:04:51.400
fetid breath was like roaches crawling across
her cheek. She twisted her head

753
01:04:51.400 --> 01:04:56.679
away from him, her arms stretched
for something she could use to free herself.

754
01:04:57.519 --> 01:05:00.039
My nephew's letters told me how sweet
you A, how candy was.

755
01:05:00.840 --> 01:05:05.559
ODIs ran his tongue across her ear. He pressed the point of the scissors

756
01:05:05.599 --> 01:05:12.920
into her belly and laughed hysterically at
the impending kill. I only wish I

757
01:05:13.039 --> 01:05:20.199
had the time to taste it.
Taste these. Maggie shoved the severed testicles

758
01:05:20.199 --> 01:05:24.760
into his open mouth. ODIs leaned
back, twisting to spit them out.

759
01:05:24.960 --> 01:05:29.079
Maggie grabbed his hand and shoved it
toward him, lodging the scissors into his

760
01:05:29.159 --> 01:05:32.840
pudgy belly. Otis ripped the office
cutlery from his abdomen and raised them overhead.

761
01:05:33.639 --> 01:05:40.480
You bitch. Maggie jammed her fingers
into the wound, pressing deeper until

762
01:05:40.519 --> 01:05:44.920
she felt something slippery between the tips. She spread her fingers, tearing the

763
01:05:44.960 --> 01:05:49.239
wound and drawing a fresh scream from
Otis. Her hand pushed through and disappeared

764
01:05:49.280 --> 01:05:55.440
inside him. As she clenched her
fingers around the tissue. Maggie jerked her

765
01:05:55.440 --> 01:06:00.559
hand free, and gravity did the
rest the intestines twisted it out of the

766
01:06:00.599 --> 01:06:04.719
new orifice like a worm wriggling on
a hook. Otis rolled away, screeching.

767
01:06:05.039 --> 01:06:09.920
He discarded the scissors to push his
guts back in as he crawled for

768
01:06:10.000 --> 01:06:15.000
the door. Carlton groaned on the
floor and staggered to his feet after a

769
01:06:15.039 --> 01:06:19.199
series of failed attempts. Maggie stood
next to the pedestal and read the little

770
01:06:19.239 --> 01:06:24.880
plaque in front of the decorative pillow. The jar of moonshine was the only

771
01:06:24.960 --> 01:06:30.639
thing that survived the fire in nineteen
thirty one. She hefted the mason jar

772
01:06:30.840 --> 01:06:34.559
and examined the contents. Carlton rubbed
the oozing wound in the center of his

773
01:06:34.679 --> 01:06:39.920
head and cleared the blood from his
eyes, just in time for the container

774
01:06:40.000 --> 01:06:44.400
to meet his face. He staggered
backwards and fell on top of the desk.

775
01:06:45.000 --> 01:06:48.280
Maggie dug in her pocket and limped
closer while Carlton struggled to remove a

776
01:06:48.320 --> 01:06:54.559
shard of glass from his cheek.
Can't can't we talk? He held up

777
01:06:54.599 --> 01:06:59.800
his hands defensively. I mean,
you don't turn your back on family right

778
01:06:59.800 --> 01:07:02.800
now, Maggie. You get it, don't you. Maggie struck a match

779
01:07:03.119 --> 01:07:08.719
and twisted it between her fingers.
I told you, I came for the

780
01:07:08.760 --> 01:07:14.800
fireworks. Carlton slowly lifted his shirt
to his nose and sniffed the alcohol saturated

781
01:07:14.840 --> 01:07:18.840
fibers. Oh shit, he rolled
over the desk. Come on, Mags,

782
01:07:19.000 --> 01:07:24.440
this isn't you. You're not a
killer New Year knew me. She

783
01:07:24.599 --> 01:07:29.960
lit the book, igniting the remaining
matches in a sulfurous flash, compliments of

784
01:07:30.000 --> 01:07:35.039
the house. Maggie tossed the match
book and Carlton ignited instantly The flames flared

785
01:07:35.079 --> 01:07:40.079
over his face as he spun,
sprinting for the giant window and diving through

786
01:07:40.079 --> 01:07:44.960
it. The stained glass fell through
the spotlights like shards of a shattered rainbow

787
01:07:45.159 --> 01:07:49.760
as he plummeted toward the cool salvation
of the beer fountain. Maggie stood in

788
01:07:49.800 --> 01:07:55.800
the empty frame and glanced down.
Carlton's burning body danced on the end of

789
01:07:55.880 --> 01:08:00.880
Poseidon's trident. Maggie watched until it
went still, his jaw tore away from

790
01:08:00.960 --> 01:08:05.719
the prongs, and his corpse dumped
into the fountain with a puff of steam

791
01:08:05.920 --> 01:08:12.480
and an anticlimactic sizzle. She ambled
away from the window, collected the scissors

792
01:08:12.519 --> 01:08:16.039
from the carpet, and made her
way to the stairwell. Her leg throbbed

793
01:08:16.039 --> 01:08:20.319
as her toes squished with each step
as the blood collected in her boot.

794
01:08:20.840 --> 01:08:26.680
She limped down the stairs, following
the crimson trail left by Otis and leaving

795
01:08:26.720 --> 01:08:30.880
her own as she braced a bloody
hand on the wall for balance. In

796
01:08:30.000 --> 01:08:34.680
the basement, she found the pile
of boards where Carlton had reopened the bootlegger

797
01:08:34.760 --> 01:08:40.720
tunnel, and beside them the carpenter's
hatchet he used to pull them down.

798
01:08:41.560 --> 01:08:45.640
She slipped the scissors into her pocket
and scooped up the small axe before continuing

799
01:08:46.119 --> 01:08:54.399
her pursuit. In the stretch of
pitch black, a flashlight danced unsteadily ahead

800
01:08:54.439 --> 01:08:58.880
of her. Maggie didn't know how
long the tunnel went on, so she

801
01:08:58.960 --> 01:09:02.800
pushed herself to catch If ODIs got
out first, he'd get in the cart

802
01:09:02.840 --> 01:09:09.119
and disappear before anyone could catch him. She couldn't let that happen. Maggie

803
01:09:09.199 --> 01:09:12.760
bit her tongue to keep the screams
at bay. She just needed to get

804
01:09:12.840 --> 01:09:18.520
closer. The light dropped, followed
by a curse. It rolled chaotically before

805
01:09:18.560 --> 01:09:24.479
it steadied and rose. Otis had
fallen, and Maggie used it to her

806
01:09:24.520 --> 01:09:30.039
advantage, pushing her wounded leg into
a hobbling sprint Otis. She cried out.

807
01:09:30.640 --> 01:09:36.439
The light stopped moving, Otis giggled
maniacally and started to turn. She

808
01:09:36.560 --> 01:09:42.199
reached back and hurled the hatchet.
The laughter turned to a howl as the

809
01:09:42.199 --> 01:09:46.560
blade found its target. Maggie watched
the beams swirl and fall to the ground

810
01:09:46.600 --> 01:09:51.199
once again. The flashlight rolled down
the path and she retrieved it. On

811
01:09:51.279 --> 01:09:56.520
her way. Otis was sprawled in
the gravel with the hatchet sticking out of

812
01:09:56.560 --> 01:10:02.920
his skull, intersecting his scar.
Ugh, not again, he whimpered,

813
01:10:03.840 --> 01:10:08.680
I haven't seen you since last year, Otis. Maggie shined the light in

814
01:10:08.760 --> 01:10:13.119
his face and drew the scissors from
her pocket. Did your nephew's letters tell

815
01:10:13.159 --> 01:10:17.239
you we used to go axe throwing
with Darren and Karen? Otis smiled slowly,

816
01:10:17.920 --> 01:10:24.359
his giggling turned to a rasping cough. Maggie knelt beside him and worked

817
01:10:24.399 --> 01:10:30.079
her fingers into his waistband. You
know, I think I missed it earlier,

818
01:10:30.920 --> 01:10:41.840
the part where the ball dropped.
Otis wasn't laughing anymore. Maggie wiped

819
01:10:41.840 --> 01:10:45.239
her fingers on her jeans, collecting
more blood than she got off, and

820
01:10:45.319 --> 01:10:50.359
flipped the ignition switch. The little
golf cart jutted forward and whirred across the

821
01:10:50.439 --> 01:10:57.680
manicured grounds to the wall of flashing
lights waiting at the Springer Hotel. Her

822
01:10:57.760 --> 01:11:01.880
mind roamed as the cart bounced along
the path. She wondered if this would

823
01:11:01.920 --> 01:11:05.359
make it into the movie, or
if they'd save it for the sequel.

824
01:11:06.920 --> 01:11:12.279
The final look of shock on Otis
Kilgore's face as she left him in that

825
01:11:12.359 --> 01:11:17.359
tunnel would make a great fade to
black. Maggie thought about him bleeding out

826
01:11:17.439 --> 01:11:33.199
in the darkness and started to giggle. Steaks and Showguns by Dan Wilder,

827
01:11:33.439 --> 01:11:41.640
dedicated to David Denier. It was
the last day of eighteen ninety nine that

828
01:11:41.720 --> 01:11:45.600
a group of brave souls put to
rest the embodiment of all things Satanic,

829
01:11:46.319 --> 01:11:53.840
the vile lord of the night,
the great dragon Count Dracula, laid low

830
01:11:53.880 --> 01:12:00.279
by means of wood, steel,
fire, and love. They celebrate the

831
01:12:00.279 --> 01:12:04.399
coming of the new year in darkest
Transylvania that year, raising many tankards of

832
01:12:04.479 --> 01:12:11.640
spiced mead and toast of their great
victory over the darkness, their minds and

833
01:12:11.800 --> 01:12:16.079
hearts filled with an abundance of faith
in the pureeness of humanity's will and its

834
01:12:16.159 --> 01:12:28.640
unwavering ability to extinguish the flame of
Hell's emissaries. Fucking dumbasses. I hate

835
01:12:28.680 --> 01:12:31.399
falling asleep here. You always wake
up with a film on the roof of

836
01:12:31.439 --> 01:12:35.680
your mouth, and the one two
punch of stale popcorn and even more stale

837
01:12:35.760 --> 01:12:41.000
piss can really take the wind out
of your sails. And don't even get

838
01:12:41.039 --> 01:12:45.000
me started on the bums that come
in here just to warm up and occasionally

839
01:12:45.119 --> 01:12:50.000
die There were a gaggle of such
gents in the front row this very night,

840
01:12:50.439 --> 01:12:55.000
and they cared about the first feature
of the evening, a re titled

841
01:12:55.000 --> 01:12:59.479
re release of blood Shack, which
had been cycled through this theater at least

842
01:12:59.520 --> 01:13:02.720
five times in as many years as
I did. I was here to see

843
01:13:02.760 --> 01:13:08.520
Showgun Assassin, which I missed on
its first go around earlier this year thanks

844
01:13:08.520 --> 01:13:12.720
to work commitments, but I'd be
damned if I missed it again. Hell,

845
01:13:13.000 --> 01:13:15.079
the trailer alone made it seem like
it would be the blood bath of

846
01:13:15.119 --> 01:13:19.800
the century, which you'd think i'd
try to avoid given my profession. But

847
01:13:20.640 --> 01:13:26.199
there was nowhere else I'd rather spend
New Year's Eve, So yeah, now

848
01:13:26.239 --> 01:13:31.239
I'm awake and hungry. I made
my way to the lobby and found it

849
01:13:31.279 --> 01:13:36.239
both quiet and empty, which it
never is, giving it a full minute

850
01:13:36.239 --> 01:13:40.800
with no sign of life. I
stole a bucket of popcorn and a watered

851
01:13:40.840 --> 01:13:45.159
down soda, neither of which I
felt guilty about since they taste like crap

852
01:13:45.199 --> 01:13:48.880
on a good day. I made
it back just in time to catch an

853
01:13:48.880 --> 01:13:55.880
earful of the raunchy Our Future presentation
theme, which made a porno score sound

854
01:13:55.920 --> 01:14:00.800
sedate by comparison with its paint swirl
graphic a company. Now, if all

855
01:14:00.840 --> 01:14:04.920
that happened next was I ate purloined
treats and watched a man and his young

856
01:14:05.000 --> 01:14:10.520
child fuck up a good sized hunk
of ancient Japan in a whirlwind of wholesome

857
01:14:10.600 --> 01:14:14.640
violence, then this would be a
boring yarn delay on you. But for

858
01:14:14.720 --> 01:14:19.520
a solid hour, that's exactly what
went down. But wait, it gets

859
01:14:19.560 --> 01:14:28.800
better. In a New York minute, at random intervals, there would be

860
01:14:28.840 --> 01:14:32.359
a mild movement from the huddled forms
of the homeless dudes in the front row,

861
01:14:32.880 --> 01:14:36.720
but whatever was going on, they
were mercifully keeping it to themselves for

862
01:14:36.800 --> 01:14:45.199
once until they didn't now one aside
about Showgun Assassin, it frequently features blood

863
01:14:45.239 --> 01:14:49.399
spraying everywhere like a nightmare money shot, and it was during one such scene

864
01:14:49.479 --> 01:14:54.039
that I noticed one of the bums
had wandered up to the screen and was

865
01:14:54.079 --> 01:15:00.319
trying to catch the on screen blood
rain in his open mouth. In the

866
01:15:00.359 --> 01:15:04.399
fuck now next he tried to lick
the screen, which was when I took

867
01:15:04.479 --> 01:15:11.199
action. Hey, FUCKO, sit
your ass down now. Usually that was

868
01:15:11.239 --> 01:15:15.600
all it would take with these folks
to return to some semblance of order,

869
01:15:15.399 --> 01:15:26.439
But not this time, Nope,
I had just fucked up royally. You

870
01:15:26.520 --> 01:15:30.760
know how a cat's eye shines in
the dark screen liquors did too. When

871
01:15:30.800 --> 01:15:35.479
he turned to look at me,
speaking of cats, he hissed at me

872
01:15:35.560 --> 01:15:41.439
as well, which was both rude
and unnerving. All I could do for

873
01:15:41.479 --> 01:15:45.720
a few seconds was stare in open
mouthed dumb assery at the rapidly approaching figure,

874
01:15:46.279 --> 01:15:51.199
a figure that was bounding across the
tops of rickety theater seats like a

875
01:15:51.279 --> 01:15:57.039
demented wolf. I gripped the wooden
armrest of my theater seat so tightly it

876
01:15:57.199 --> 01:16:00.920
snapped off, not much of a
hercules result, given the state of the

877
01:16:00.920 --> 01:16:04.960
theater. Within a heartbeat, the
creature had lifted me from my seat with

878
01:16:05.039 --> 01:16:10.920
one hand and stared into my eyes
with those freaky glowing peepers of his.

879
01:16:11.960 --> 01:16:16.239
I was nearly mesmerized, but regained
my senses enough to mutter, you're a

880
01:16:16.479 --> 01:16:21.640
vampire. When the being opened its
jaws wide as a snake, and twin

881
01:16:21.800 --> 01:16:28.479
fangs descended wetly from its whisky scented
gums. As if by instinct, I

882
01:16:28.600 --> 01:16:32.439
shoved the jagged edge of my broken
armrests directly through the creature's heart. The

883
01:16:32.479 --> 01:16:38.159
being crumpled and had dissolved to bones
before it hit the cum and gum encrusted

884
01:16:38.199 --> 01:16:43.359
floor. I tried desperately to catch
my breath, but more hissing erupted from

885
01:16:43.359 --> 01:16:47.800
the peanut gallery. I know where
your mind is headed. This badass took

886
01:16:47.840 --> 01:16:54.079
out the rest of those fang bangers
next in a shocking and entertaining explosion of

887
01:16:54.279 --> 01:17:01.159
raw action. I agree that sounds
amazing. I puked instead. Oh shit,

888
01:17:01.800 --> 01:17:05.920
maybe I was a tad unclear as
to my profession I work reception at

889
01:17:05.920 --> 01:17:14.880
a blood bank. Anyway, it
turns out I had more than enough time

890
01:17:14.920 --> 01:17:19.760
to spray vomit on seats that were
no strangers to such actions. As the

891
01:17:19.800 --> 01:17:24.920
Master of Death succumbed to our hero's
sword. On screen, I could see

892
01:17:24.960 --> 01:17:29.239
that the remainder of the front row
were feeding upon themselves instead of hunting me

893
01:17:29.359 --> 01:17:34.560
down. Apparently, cheap booze and
supernatural monsters are not good friends. This

894
01:17:34.720 --> 01:17:39.800
time, I wised up and made
a run for it. So the lobby

895
01:17:39.920 --> 01:17:45.000
was still dead and completely without anything
remotely useful as a weapon, and the

896
01:17:45.039 --> 01:17:50.840
front doors and fire exits seemed to
be welded shut. So that's just fucking

897
01:17:50.920 --> 01:17:57.439
great. The adjoining theater was without
patrons, but a swarm of bats swirled

898
01:17:57.479 --> 01:18:00.920
around the light from the projection booth
as a horn ernie fishman was making sweet

899
01:18:01.279 --> 01:18:06.840
scaly love to his less than enthused
partner. Their red eyes turned towards me,

900
01:18:08.399 --> 01:18:12.279
and I slammed that door shut.
I can't believe I'm going to die

901
01:18:12.319 --> 01:18:17.520
without seeing that fucking movie again.
The manager's office was sans manager, but

902
01:18:17.760 --> 01:18:24.039
plus one shaker of garlic salt,
so I had that one going for me.

903
01:18:24.560 --> 01:18:29.039
I mean, if vampire movies were
to be believed, I'm so fucked.

904
01:18:29.840 --> 01:18:33.359
Looking out the office's sealed tight window, I could see drunken revelers making

905
01:18:33.359 --> 01:18:40.159
their way down the street, completely
oblivious to the impending hammer film scenario about

906
01:18:40.199 --> 01:18:44.720
to play out in this greasy little
shithole. As if on cue, the

907
01:18:44.760 --> 01:18:47.840
door to the room exploded into a
million pieces. As those bats finally caught

908
01:18:47.920 --> 01:18:51.399
up to me, I tore the
top of the garlic salt off and began

909
01:18:51.560 --> 01:18:58.439
flailing it like a madman possessed.
The barrage hit the bats dead on eventually,

910
01:18:58.840 --> 01:19:02.840
and they fell to the ground in
smoking, screeching piles. I made

911
01:19:02.840 --> 01:19:08.640
my way through the thickening haze and
hauled ass back downstairs. And that's when

912
01:19:08.680 --> 01:19:14.760
I heard the cry for help.
Someone was clearly calling for help. As

913
01:19:14.760 --> 01:19:18.479
I flew pellmell into the lobby,
someone in the theater I had currently occupied.

914
01:19:19.199 --> 01:19:23.920
For fock's sake, I made my
way to the theater door and cracked

915
01:19:23.920 --> 01:19:29.439
it open. Well, the movie
had ended, so there's that. Cautiously,

916
01:19:29.479 --> 01:19:33.000
I made my way into the silent
auditorium. I walked past my bile

917
01:19:33.079 --> 01:19:40.279
soaked seat, and there, untouched
by puke particles, was my pilfered beverage.

918
01:19:41.279 --> 01:19:45.000
I grabbed it and took a pool
water with just a hint of cola

919
01:19:45.039 --> 01:19:50.399
flavor. I'd sampled this vintage before. In the now raised house lights,

920
01:19:50.600 --> 01:19:56.720
I could see the absolutely nauseating scene
inside. The vamps had eaten themselves to

921
01:19:56.800 --> 01:20:00.479
death, double death, and from
under what could ad only be charitably referred

922
01:20:00.520 --> 01:20:06.359
to as a gut pile, came
that pained call for assistance. As I

923
01:20:06.439 --> 01:20:12.520
neared the mountain of wreaking carnage,
a hand darted skywards, sending glistening red

924
01:20:12.560 --> 01:20:15.880
bits in every direction. Help,
please, for all that's holy, help

925
01:20:16.000 --> 01:20:21.640
me against my better judgment. I
grabbed the wrist of that mystery arm and

926
01:20:21.760 --> 01:20:28.000
tugged hard. You know that sound
when you dump a slow moving turd of

927
01:20:28.039 --> 01:20:32.039
dog food from the can and it
finally shimmys its way free. That was

928
01:20:32.079 --> 01:20:36.560
the sound that filled the air.
Although it was a great deal. Louder,

929
01:20:38.359 --> 01:20:42.159
a bearded man, his thin frame
covered in gore, fell from the

930
01:20:42.199 --> 01:20:47.600
mound of formerly human sloppy joe.
Thank you, my son. He punctuated

931
01:20:47.600 --> 01:20:55.239
that statement with a sour wine belch, you a holy man. Formerly my

932
01:20:55.359 --> 01:21:00.600
flock has sadly gone astray, He
gagged. Any idea, what's going on

933
01:21:00.720 --> 01:21:06.039
here? Sadly I do, he
said, his brows furrowed and dripped one

934
01:21:06.079 --> 01:21:13.720
bodily fluid after another go on,
I went to the bathroom, turning wine

935
01:21:13.720 --> 01:21:16.960
into piss. Jesus would be proud. I was pretty happy with that one,

936
01:21:17.279 --> 01:21:20.840
though the hobo didn't even react.
Even at the end, I can't

937
01:21:20.840 --> 01:21:27.159
catch a break in there. I
saw the manager of this fine establishment kneeling

938
01:21:27.199 --> 01:21:30.479
in one of the stalls. He
started sobbing like a baby. Come on,

939
01:21:30.640 --> 01:21:38.319
spit it out, you pious motherfucker. He was was was was what

940
01:21:39.920 --> 01:21:49.680
giving who I believe was was Dracula
A A here's what I know this dude

941
01:21:49.680 --> 01:21:54.199
from the garbage plate used to be
a priest, comes here to get warm

942
01:21:54.279 --> 01:21:59.640
and and I can't believe I'm going
to say this gave Count Dracula a bj

943
01:21:59.840 --> 01:22:02.960
in the bathroom. Yeah, it
turns out when he was done with the

944
01:22:03.000 --> 01:22:09.720
manager, he used his mesmerism to
continue on with the padre there when said

945
01:22:09.800 --> 01:22:15.000
encounter happened. He could see things
from Dracula's mind, him surviving a murder

946
01:22:15.039 --> 01:22:18.119
plot, his arrival in Manhattan in
the turn of the century, his dwelling

947
01:22:18.279 --> 01:22:23.920
torn down in a movie theater erected
while he slumbered in the cold soil hidden

948
01:22:23.960 --> 01:22:30.600
below, and his resurrection through feeding
on the homeless that sheltered in the cinema.

949
01:22:30.800 --> 01:22:33.920
This was all told over candy that
had went off data solid four months

950
01:22:33.920 --> 01:22:40.560
ago. I refilled my water soda
and took a long pull. Now,

951
01:22:40.680 --> 01:22:45.319
my plan here was to spit out
some cool ass catchphrase and make a plan

952
01:22:45.439 --> 01:22:48.880
for trying to get away from this
nightmare, maybe build some sweet weapons.

953
01:22:49.520 --> 01:22:55.760
But the smoke got in my lungs. Wait, smoke, those damn bats.

954
01:22:56.279 --> 01:23:00.399
They came a flopping and smoldering down
the stairs into the lobby, and

955
01:23:00.439 --> 01:23:04.840
they were looking more healthy by the
second come on, think Wait, were

956
01:23:04.880 --> 01:23:11.479
the bats melting together? I took
the final pull off my drink and tossed

957
01:23:11.479 --> 01:23:15.720
the cup to the ground. The
bats had formed one large bat that strode

958
01:23:15.760 --> 01:23:20.520
forward, walking on its wings.
It roared at us as it slowly advanced.

959
01:23:20.520 --> 01:23:25.720
Its bulks smashed into the concession stand
sending popcorn and soda cups in every

960
01:23:25.760 --> 01:23:31.520
direction. That's when it hit me. A priest water soda. I bet

961
01:23:31.520 --> 01:23:34.840
that could be one hell of a
holy water. Hey, father, do

962
01:23:34.880 --> 01:23:39.039
you think you have it in you
to bless some water? He burped.

963
01:23:39.720 --> 01:23:45.840
I took that as yes. Now
this was a plan, except I finished

964
01:23:45.840 --> 01:23:49.359
my drink and the soda fountain had
been smashed to shitterenes by the drack attack.

965
01:23:50.479 --> 01:23:56.800
That's when an idea occurred. I
was about to die and I really

966
01:23:56.840 --> 01:24:00.279
needed to take a piss. I
mean, I could probably just let it

967
01:24:00.319 --> 01:24:05.159
go at this point. What a
shitty way to go think, think that

968
01:24:05.199 --> 01:24:10.359
could work? Father? Does it
matter what vessel the holy water flows from?

969
01:24:11.000 --> 01:24:15.359
Two burps? That's clearly a no. It was then that I whipped

970
01:24:15.359 --> 01:24:19.640
it out and turned towards the priest. You'll father bless this. He held

971
01:24:19.680 --> 01:24:26.159
a trembling hand above my stream and
said something. Regardless, it worked,

972
01:24:26.359 --> 01:24:30.399
and I hosed that hell beast down
good. As his flesh sizzled, Dracula

973
01:24:30.560 --> 01:24:36.159
hissed, screamed something in a language
I didn't understand, burst back into his

974
01:24:36.239 --> 01:24:41.439
bat form, and exploded through the
glass doors of the lobby and out into

975
01:24:41.439 --> 01:24:45.479
the frigid winter night. The priest
had dozed off. I stepped over the

976
01:24:45.479 --> 01:24:55.000
broken glass and out onto the street. More New Year's revelers passed, laughing

977
01:24:55.039 --> 01:25:00.760
onward into the night, a night
that now contained the greatest evil known mankind,

978
01:25:00.760 --> 01:25:13.479
and evil waiting to strike again.
Well, my friends, my spookies,

979
01:25:13.640 --> 01:25:18.720
my countrymen of sorts, it's time
to say goodbye to twenty twenty three

980
01:25:18.880 --> 01:25:25.039
one last time, and I want
to say thank you all so much.

981
01:25:25.079 --> 01:25:30.520
You've made this year very special to
me in so many ways. By listening,

982
01:25:30.600 --> 01:25:35.560
by sharing, by subscribing on Patreon, by buying merchandise, by supporting

983
01:25:35.800 --> 01:25:43.880
my sick dogs go fund me.
You all have really taught me this year

984
01:25:45.119 --> 01:25:50.159
that I'm not just building a spooky
podcast where we tell each other ooh scary

985
01:25:50.239 --> 01:25:55.159
stories, although that's a lot of
it and that's what I love. No,

986
01:25:55.159 --> 01:25:59.600
no, no, You've shown me
that I've been able to build a

987
01:25:59.600 --> 01:26:06.039
commune unity because of such upstanding,
wonderful listeners, And that's you. You

988
01:26:06.119 --> 01:26:11.560
guys are awesome. You guys write
me emails asking about my personal life,

989
01:26:11.560 --> 01:26:15.119
how I'm doing, how I'm feeling. You write me letters where you tell

990
01:26:15.159 --> 01:26:18.760
me about your personal lives, how
listening to the show makes your day go

991
01:26:18.840 --> 01:26:24.640
by a little bit easier. And
you know what, hearing that your day

992
01:26:24.680 --> 01:26:30.039
goes by a little bit easier because
you're listening to my show, it makes

993
01:26:30.119 --> 01:26:36.359
my day go by a little bit
easier. So thank you from the bottom

994
01:26:36.439 --> 01:26:44.079
of my heart for giving me the
opportunity to entertain and scare you every single

995
01:26:44.119 --> 01:26:47.920
week. And if you didn't know, we all hang out over on Facebook.

996
01:26:48.119 --> 01:26:51.239
I know, I know some people
don't want to be on Facebook,

997
01:26:51.359 --> 01:26:56.000
But if ever there was a reason
to have a basic account, it would

998
01:26:56.039 --> 01:27:00.680
be so you can go on to
Facebook and visit weekly Spooky's Tomb of Terror.

999
01:27:01.319 --> 01:27:04.960
It's free. It's just where myself, a bunch of the fans,

1000
01:27:05.000 --> 01:27:09.760
a bunch of the authors. It's
where we all hang out. We share

1001
01:27:09.840 --> 01:27:15.399
things, we make each other laugh, and I think that's what it's all

1002
01:27:15.439 --> 01:27:24.479
about. So with that all being
said, we've got a mini series coming

1003
01:27:24.560 --> 01:27:29.399
up in January, and a whole
lot of new stuff coming down the pike.

1004
01:27:30.520 --> 01:27:34.079
I have no intention of slowing down. Thank you for over two hundred

1005
01:27:34.079 --> 01:27:40.520
episodes and four years, and here's
too many more. All my love to

1006
01:27:40.600 --> 01:27:45.039
you, Thank you,