Monthly Spooky | The Great Moon Hoax, Halloween Hauntings, Bigfoot & UFOs

Navigating the Arctic all alone. Hot Jimothy Summer hits America. The Croc Ness Monster? And mystery space molecules that no one can explain. Get comfortable. Turn off the lights. It's Monthly Spooky News. Well, hello, my spookies. It is indeed... Chella, you want to say it? Um, that's okay. You can say it. It is indeed that time of the month. Time for Monthly Spooky. I'm, of course, your host, Henrique Couto, here with my good buddy and co-host, Michelle. Michelle, how are you? Uh... radiant i see yeah yeah sure okay. I i want to point out that you know michelle threw out the idea of record we're recording this uh on a monday it's airing on a monday but different mondays um but we're recording this on a monday and it was michelle's idea but she's the one who shows up with that monday energy sorry but you you doing okay no but that's okay.

That's okay. Why is that okay? Because I don't have a choice. Do any of us? I don't know. I'm just me. That is the most fair argument I've heard. I don't know. I'm just me. It's very fair. Well, I'm doing all right. I'm not doing too bad. You know, only having like three degrees of midlife crisis as I recklessly approach 40. So, I'll be turning 40 when this airs, it'll be like 10 days from four zero. Wow. Yeah. So, and I'm excited because I can only assume since Michelle hasn't said anything that she's going to like show up at my house and surprise me and just has been really keeping it low key.

Yeah. We did just book my birthday party. Oh, okay. Yeah. Big shock at the cigar lounge. Um, But I had an idea cause I, I, I'm trying to turn like the 40 feels, which I thought weren't really happening until like two months ago. And then, Oh, I'm totally feeling weird ways. Yeah. Uh, I'm trying to turn that into a positive. So I've like put, I put a lot of, I put an incredible amount of effort into getting my health under control, like losing weight. I'm really getting close to 40 pounds down. I got really close.

I'm about six pounds away from 40 pounds. And, uh, and that it hasn't been that hard, which I'm happy about. Um, I mean, it hasn't been the most fun I've ever had in my life, but it hasn't been too hard. Although, I mean, everything gets easier, you know, the, the, well, except the more you lose weight, everything gets easier except losing even more weight. That's the thing that gets less easy. But I mean, like, you know, um, getting comfortable and going to sleep and things like that just is easier when you, when you drop a couple of pounds.

So that's been good. Um, I'm, in theory at some point getting a new car, which yeah. And I'm trying to like, even though I needed a new car anyway, I'm trying to shoehorn it in. Like that's me. Like owning 40 is like, and I'm going to have a new car, even though in reality, like I need a new car. Yeah. See, so I'm trying to turn the negatives into positives. I'm trying to just say like, it's not that I'm, you know, freaked out about getting older. It's that I'm going to do better in some ways, you know, I'm going to like put my effort forward.

Yeah. What are you counting on your fingers? I was just going to say that I had, like, I actually had a really good 40 until about the middle of December. So for the first, like, six-ish months that I was 40, I was, like, in a really great mood. So, like, maybe you'll have that. And then it could turn bad. Yeah, there you go. Okay, okay. Because 40 was, like, really, really good. I was super happy. because I was like into anime. I was like really into an anime. So yeah, but then everything just fell apart.

You're not into anime anymore, huh? Oh no. It's just that health issues superseded it. So now it doesn't quite, it's, it's not enough. Like I'm trying, but it's not enough. Everything's bad. I felt kind of that way about my thirties as far as like, I felt like it was really just owning like as a decade, not as the year. Um, and then after like the COVID thing, uh, I felt like I was just trying to rejigger everything all the time to be better. So, you know, it's not the easiest thing in the world, but, uh, but yeah, I'm trying.

And Hey, uh, if it makes you feel any better, Chell, I guarantee everyone would guess that you are younger than me. Consistently. I don't know, man. I am positive. I think everybody thinks I'm like a million years old. I don't know how people think of me anymore. I guarantee you sincerely that people would guess like, I don't know, since you're asking, it's gotta be a trap. So like 32, I don't cause like, I'm not going to say 27. Cause if you, if you had to ask, that means I'm going to be surprised. I don't think I look 32.

I think you could totally pull that off. Okay. I'm just, I'm being honest. It's, it's, I mean, you dress like a young person. I mean, a lame young person, but a young person, right? See, if I add that qualifier, people are like, why are you being mean? If I add that qualifier, she can't fight me. Yeah. Because if I say you dress young, not good, but young, then she'll go, okay, yeah, I do. As long as I, as long as there's something negative about her in there, then she'll stick with it. Yeah. But no, and you, you know, you got kind of a youthfulness.

Well, yeah. All I'm saying is, well, so did you have people constantly guessing you were substantially older than you really were when you were young? No. Then I don't want to hear your whining. Okay, fine. I mean, I couldn't, I couldn't get into like, well, I mean, I could with, with ID, but I was getting into like R rated movies when I was like 25 or 26. So I believe that. Well, and that's, and some of that also comes down to facial hair. I mean, no, I mean, that a lot of men, sorry, enough facial.

I'm sorry, but I have some. I know. I know there's some Armenian happening in there. No, I was just like a lot of men. We stopped getting ID'd the moment we start rocking a real, like a beard or a mustache or whatever. I mean, we might still get ID'd for like alcohol, but you're not going to get ID'd for like 18 and up movies. Once you have a beard, they're just going to be like, Oh, come on in, sir. But, uh, but like, from the time I was like 22, people thought I was like pushing 40.

Wow. I was told that consistently. I remember one time asking a girl out and she literally said like, you seem really nice, but I'm not into older men. She was three years older than me. Wow. So I've been kind of, I was like, well, I guess I'll just lean into the whole, that whole, um, Oh, what's his name? That, uh, artist that wasn't actually good, but he was cool. Andy Warhol. Oh, um, But I'll lean into that because he would dress like he was older so that no one... His thing was, I'll dress like you're older so no one will notice when you age.

So he'd wear like suits and stuff. So I'm like, okay, cool. Eventually I'll catch up with how old everybody thinks I am. Yeah, there you go. So hooray, hooray, hooray. But I'm excited about it. And if anybody listening to this feels really generous, I'll put my Amazon wish list in the show notes tonight. But, you know... I also would like just well wishes sent to weekly spooky at gmail.com. I mean, a little kindness goes a very long way. So, you know, that would be cool with me. Just one person being nice to me since Michelle never will.

Yeah. That would be cool. So, but, oh, we have a pretty epic show. I'm not going to lie. We have some really good news stories that I was very excited to dig deeper into and our topic. this month is about the great moon hoax of 1835. Oh no, there. There was a moon and then something happened. I don't know what that could mean. I'll give you one hint. Okay. Yeah. It involves beavers and bat people. I still, What? Yeah, it made it worse, didn't it? Yeah. Yeah, I didn't make that up either. That's legitimately. But why not bats and bad people or beavers and beaver people?

I don't know. We're going to learn together because we all learn better when we learn together. Beavers can't be on the moon. There's no water on the moon. I like how that's the thing. That's the thing. That's the problem. They would hate it there. You don't know that. I do. What if they brought water from home? They won't bring enough. It has to be running water so they can make little dams and things. Well, now you're just really assuming what they want out of life based on a lot of societal expectation. Exactly. You're right. Fine.

Just let them go to the moon. I don't even care anymore. Wow. Chell is in a, man, this is going to be a fun one. I don't even care. Whoa. For all I care. yeah that is one of my favorite things just add for all i care after any kind of fun fact you know like did you know that you uh that that you can buy a car made of cheese for all i care uh well we're gonna take a quick break and when we get back we're gonna dive into that news right after this All right, Chell.

Are you ready? For what? For the spooky news. The spooky news. Aw, yeah. We're heading to people.com. Oh. Yeah. As opposed to person.com or. org. Oh, jeez. Or. edu. This is from people.com. This I thought you would appreciate, Chelle, especially because of what we were talking about off the air. Oh, really? Yeah. Anna Camp to host spine-tingling renovation series set in one of America's most haunted houses. Whoa. You haven't heard about this? I kind of think I might have, actually. I feel like everybody's talking about this. Like, I even debated not covering it because I felt like it was so common.

They're talking about a very haunted renovation. I don't know. I don't know if I have, actually. Cause this is totally your jam and it has a connection because it's in Ohio. Oh, where though? Uh, Fremont, Ohio, which I don't know where that is. Um, HGTV is newest renovation series is bringing one of America's most haunted houses. That's in quotes back from the dead hosted by Anna camp, a very haunted renovation premiering Tuesday, September 15th. Oh, coming right up. Yeah. Sorry. Oh, and you looked at your watch like it would have a calendar on it. Sees the Scream 7 star head to Fremont, Ohio to welcome six brave designers into the, quote, eerie and historic Beale Manor.

People got an exclusive first look at the six-episode season during which the group is not only tasked with restoring the Victorian mansion to save it from being torn down, but they also have to eat, sleep, and live there for 31 days. Sounds like a nice vacation. Is that what you feel like? Yeah. I mean, you don't feel like that'd be scary at all? No. I don't think. I don't think. I don't even. I feel like I know I've heard of this Beale Mansion before, but I bet it's not haunted. I bet it's just you have to.

Actually, this sounds terrible because you have to be there with other people for 30 days and you work and then you can't leave. This is what I was getting at. Oh, my God. I hate this. Oh, it's out by like Sandusky. So toward the middle of the north middle of the state, kind of close to Toledo. Okay. So at least you can go to Toledo. I mean, it's two and a half hours away. I'm going to have to drive further than that to pick up my car. Yay. Whenever that happens. Yeah. I didn't look because I was like, it's fine.

However, I have to drive is fine. And it was like, oh, cool. It's almost three hours away. That's fine. That means I really get to get to get to know the car. Yeah. And say goodbye to the old car. Yeah. I still remember the first thing I listened to in my car when it was born. I mean. When you adopted it? When I adopted it. What was it? I listened to the latest At The Drive-In album. Hmm. Yeah. That sounds all right. It's okay. Well, at least you have the memory with the car of it.

Yeah. People, oh, I already read that part. Ghosts roam three floors of eerie spaces, tormenting all those who enter, camp teases in the above clip. Unaccompanied, falling apart, and on the verge of demolition, no one is brave enough to set foot inside. Until now. I'm sure there was lots of squatters in there. Well, Fremont might be too small an area, like their homeless population would just be like really low, you know, small town. Sorry, you're sad about that, you're like, damn. I am going to do, because I'd never heard of Beale Manor ever. So I am going to do a deep dive on Beale Manor for an episode of Thursday Thrills.

Okay. Probably the week before. Actually, it'll air on my birthday because it'll be before the show airs. On the 10th of September. Along the way, local townspeople share their terrifying stories, including ghostly encounters that they've personally experienced with the property. Quote, I would see a man standing upstairs, just standing there, looking out the window. I found out there was nobody there. The house was empty, a former neighbor recalls. Squatters. What'd you say? I said squatters. Squatter, you wish. Little. I know. Meanwhile, homeowners Carlo and Heather have had their own fair share of spooky experiences in the abode.

Quote, Nobody told me this when I bought it, says Carlo of the property's haunted history. Heather adds of one chilling memory, quote, I went down to the basement. I felt this cold finger go all the way down from my neck down to my back. That wouldn't bother you? No, it would. I just it's just only from her neck to her back. It's not that's not that far. Oh, I see what you're, yeah, that's what you're getting at. That's the hill you're going to, you're going to die on. Yeah. Yeah. If she said like all the way from like her head all the way down to her feet, I would be like, Oh, that's no.

If it was a person doing it, they'd have to be so committed. They'd like get down on the ground. Yeah. And it just feels not good. But yeah, if it's just like that, I don't know. I mean, that could be anything. It could be a spider web. Okay. Okay. That's a fair point. I see what you're saying. At first, I was just weirded out by the lack of desire for a personal bubble you apparently had. But, all right, fair enough. Carlo notes that while he hopes to save this house, its reputation has made it hard to get contractors to work on it.

Really? I'd work on it? Jeez. You're not a contractor. There you have it. I know, but, yeah, you're right. It makes it hard to get contractors to work on it. I'd work on it. You're not a contractor. That's the problem. Oh. We have nothing but non-contractors showing up saying, I'll do it. It's like, but you can't. It's almost a weird curse in and of itself. Yeah. It forces non-contractors to try to work on it, which is why it's falling apart. Nobody knows what they're doing, but they keep fixing it. The house is just forcing it, demanding coats of paint.

Quote, everybody knows that it's definitely haunted. Local builder Adam chimes in. You just always feel like you're not alone. You just feel like somebody's watching you. While no one has dared to take on the challenge until now, the six designers, S.K. Stokes, Kennedy, Patrick Peel, John Ryan, Bershon Shaw, Logan Wright, and Diana Vogel, are ready to immerse themselves in the, quote, tormented mansion and give its spine-tingling spaces a full transformation per a press release. From HGTV. That's not as easy as I thought it'd be. Hey, that all rhymed. HGTV, not as easy as I thought it'd be.

That'd be a great motto for them. Yeah. Not as easy as I thought it would be. Yeah. A sack of money just comes in, drops in front of me. That's actually a perfect motto for the home garden television. Actually, it's not anymore. Oh. It used to be really like DIY and stuff. And they'd be like, look, we can show you how to do things. And now it's all just like, look, it's someone flip a house and it's actually looks easier than it is. Okay. So it isn't as easy as you thought it would be from.

Yeah. Yeah. I, I, I loved those memes about like, you know, the couple and it'd be like, I, I, I, uh, work at a bottling factory and I collect butterflies. Our budget is $ 1. 8 million. Yeah. Yeah. I always thought it would be even better. It should just be things that aren't even potentially a career. It's just like, you know, just like I have no legs and I'm, and I'm Italian. We, our budget is $ 1. 4 million. Like you're like, what? Yeah. Their design skills and fearlessness will be tested as they compete to be crowned winners of the competition and receive a $ 50, 000 cash prize.

In addition to being met with elimination challenges each episode, they'll also receive guidance from design expert and mentor Michelle Smith-Boyd. Spooky icons will serve as guest judges throughout the season, including actors Billy Porter, Lulu Wilson, and Elvira star Cassandra Peterson. I like how she refuses to dress as Elvira anymore, so they have to say Elvira star, but then it's Cassandra Peterson. As well as paranormal investigator Jack Osborne, horror film director Eli Roth, and production designer Hannah Beachler. I actually think having a horror-known production designer is perfect. Because they literally decorate homes and sets. So that's kind of perfect.

And they design the sets. So, I mean, they don't build them by hand, but they design them. Them yeah and I actually have heard of this now I guess I just was like not watching the commercials like when it was on I was just kind of like hearing in the background you. Were just in a fugue state yeah. But I remember hearing that the Elvira person was going to be in the thing so yeah. That's really cool The very first episode of a very haunted renovation will see the competitors break into two teams as they work to reimagine one of the bedrooms.

But there's one catch. The space has to draw on the spirits of Lizzie and Alvy Beal, who are, quote, rumored to haunt the sleeping quarters, according to the release. No, no, no, no, no. I'm actually pissed off now. Leave the dead people alone, because that's how that's like you're going to piss them off. Just renovate the house. Well, they're not going to exercise them out. Like, wouldn't that be what would make you really mad if it was like, and we're going to do an exorcism at the end? Yeah, that would make me really upset. But it's kind of like, hey, let's do our best to make this for these people who are dead.

I don't know. Just do your own thing. Well, on that note, we're going to take a quick break. And when we get back, things are going to get a little extra interesting right after this. Well, Chell, we're back, and now we're heading somewhere I actually am surprised we haven't ended up before on this show. We're going to coasttocoastam.com. Oh. Yeah. Where the headline reads, Croc Ness Monster Has Italian Town Buzzing. Oh. Now, sadly, these are not crocs, and I was hoping it would be crocs. but this is a literal crocodile. Oh, I was hoping it would be a crock pot.

Oh, that would be good too. That's because you couldn't read that it was no K. That's why you didn't know. Yeah. A photo purportedly showing a crocodile lurking in an Italian town's lake has the community buzzing as residents debate the veracity of the image and visitors flock to the village hoping to spot the creature. curious case reportedly began back in May when a maintenance worker snapped the picture seen below at a pond in the community of Massiano. The image, I got a side note, I've been working on learning European Portuguese and it makes reading, things that I used to read with total ease every day in Spanish or Italian are now so hard that Because I'm trying to learn these incredibly different pronunciations.

Yeah. Example, I was working on trying to memorize, to not memorize, but like to nail the pronunciation on a term that means bad thing, basically. It means like something that's bad luck, bad thing. And it's spelled C-O-I-S-A, next word, R-U-I-M. Okay. Looks like coisa ruim, if you were speaking English. Coisa ruim. Mm-hmm. It's Khois Kheem. Khois Kheem. And I'm nailing it right now. I'm actually shocked. I worked on it a lot last night. Khois Kheem. Good for you. Khois Kheem. That's the Portuguese pronunciation. Because I'm watching a movie, or I'm getting ready to watch a movie.

It's called the first Portuguese horror film. And its name is, the title is Khois Kheem. Okay. Khois Kheem. Kheem. I'm getting better at that. Anyway. Anyway. Everybody's like, please keep going into the mic. That's all we want from the show. Anyway, the community of Masiano, or Masianu, that would be if it was in Portuguese. The image quickly became the talk of the town, and authorities launched a search for the creature, but found no sign of the reptile, which some have taken to calling the croc-nest monster. It does look like a crocodile to me. Or an alligator.

I'm guessing crocodiles. There aren't any alligators on that side of the world. I think they're all crocodiles. I get really confused between the two. I understand. It's very hateful. But it could very easily be a toy. I've even seen, although this one doesn't look like it, a friend of mine had a pond on her property. And one time I got freaked out because I was near it at night and I thought I saw a little alligator. Which would be very unusual in Ohio. but it scared the heck out of me. And it was, um, it was like a little floaty thing that that's meant to like disperse something.

I don't know if it's like a chemical or like food for fish or something, but it looks like, but like playfully, it just kind of looks like a little alligator, but it's got like, when you really look at it, you can see like the joints are all weird. Cause it's meant to float and stuff. Although I guess alligators are meant to float too. Anyway. Well, occasionally they also sink. Yeah. Okay. As long as we all agree. While whether or not the picture is genuine remains up for debate, there is no argument that the mystery has captivated Masiano and the surrounding region.

To the delight of many business owners, the small community has become something of an unlikely tourist destination this summer as word of the crock-nest monster has spread throughout the area. Among those getting in on the action are a restaurant which created a special Masiano crocodile cocktail and a local football team which has also adopted the reptilian moniker. I never thought it'd be, the news would be, uh, uh, Italian town figures out how to sell more alcohol, but not trying to be mean, but the people that they like to drink. And I don't just, I don't mean like Italians.

I mean like people in Italy, it's a very big part of the culture. They like to drink. Yeah, I guess. No, I mean wine and stuff. I'm not saying that they're just like, I mean, they're not like those, you know, the Irish and the Scots. Let's, let's talk about those people first. No, but no, I mean, they like to drink wine. It's like a culture thing. Mm-hmm. like when I was looking into, um, eventually going to Portugal, uh, everything I read was like, you need to either learn how to drink wine or learn how to drink espresso because that is all people drink there.

Wow. And I was like, Oh boy, I guess I'll learn how to drink espresso. Yeah. So, but, but yeah, so they're also big wine drinkers. They just like to drink wine a lot. So not trying to pick on them, but, uh, That is the whole article coast to coast AM straight into the point. Yeah. Yeah. It is weird to me. Like croc nest monster. You're in Italy. Like, I feel like there's gotta be a better pun than croc nest monster for Italy. You'd think so, but maybe not. Oh, dang. Maybe you're right. Yeah. The linguine lizard.

The risotto reptile. Why does it have to be like a pasta. Or a food? Ask Italy why it has to be a pasta. That's not my fault that that's all I know. The Mussolini monster? I mean, sure. Why are you crapping on all my awesome takes? I just don't know. I think probably the crock nest monster is the best we're going to do. But the lock nest monster is in Scotland. It has nothing to do with Italy. Well, then you have to find an Italian cryptid and then name it something like that. I already did.

The Mussolini monster. Okay, fine. If Mussolini isn't an Italian cryptid, then I don't believe anything I read in history books ever again. Okay, fine. Fine. I mean, could anything other than a cryptid make trains run on time? I don't know. Do you know other cryptids that deal with trains? Yeah. Oh. Mothman. Oh. Okay. Not that Mothman works on a train or anything, but I've heard there are rumors that Mothman is autistic and autistic people love trains. And I appreciate that. Yeah. Okay. It's orderly. It's nice. You know, it has a horn. I like horns. I don't.

Really? They're okay. I like horns like the instrument, but when they're just like in a car, not so much. They're okay. What if you went to see a ska band? They just had four cars on the stage. Okay, that would be really cool. Yeah, you would love that, wouldn't you? It would be awesome. Yeah. If it was whole cars, it would be cool. Would it be cool if it was just like the obscenely big mechanism from a car? Sure. The whole cars would be cooler. Way cooler. Oh, yeah. Way cooler. Yeah. Yeah. The only sad thing is that the band name The Cars is already taken.

So what would be a good name for a ska band where the horns are cars? Come on. You got to have one. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Park it up. Park it up. Up. Up. Nah, it's not that good. I'm trying here, okay? It's a Monday. Okay. I don't know. I can't come up with anything. Well, I guess this is as good a time as any to take a quick break. And when we get back, we're going to talk about some more spooky news right after this. Okay, we're back. And Chell, we're heading to Europe.

Oh. For the euronews.com, where they have a headline reading exclusive, Brussels keen to monitor UFOs under the radar. Hmm. See how they used UFOs and not UAPs in the headline because of SEO? Oh. UAPs, man. Stop trying to make UAP happen. It's not happening. It's not going to happen. Okay, fine. Jeez. Just trying to help you understand. No. Brussels has signaled it is monitoring unidentified anomalous phenomena, UAP. See, it's not in the headline. And has hinted at improving capabilities according to documents seen by Euronews. The European Commission seems to have been monitoring unidentified anomalous phenomena under the radar since at least 2023 and according to a document from the Commission's Defense Department seen by Euronews, which pertains to sky and space observations in Malaysia, which is not Europe.

No. I just want to make that clear. Malaysia is not Europe. No. So I'm already confused. Me too. Quote, we are getting better at seeing it and better at identifying it as our technological capacities improve. But we need to get even better, the letter read, signaling the EU executive is actively monitoring the phenomenon more than officially stated and seems keen to investigate it. Formerly known as unidentified flying objects, is it? Because you used that first. I feel like that doesn't mean it's formerly UFOs. It's currently UFOs, since you said it in the headlines. Yeah. UAPs ain't happening.

I'm sorry. They're just not happening. Fine. Fine. I refuse. This is where I draw the line. Right here. No further. It's a little bit of Captain Picard. The term UAP was introduced by the United States Defense Department, the Pentagon, in August of 2020 when Washington established the UAP Task Force to investigate inexplicable occurrences in restricted airspace. Hmm. Hmm. The topic took on a more serious tone after a New York Times report revealed in 2017 that the U.S. Defense Department files contained UAP footage from military flights that the Navy had just released. Euronews also identified a Malaysian father and son, amateur astronomers internationally recognized by space agencies for the discoveries of the surface and activities on the moon in 2020, who reached out to the commission with a letter titled, quote, UAP captures in the airspace and deep space using our UV infrared telescope in October of 2022.

The family duo sent 37 sky and space footage images to the commission, including alleged UAPs, and asked President Ursula von der Leyen about their origins. They noted that all governments simply have no opinions of these UAPs when confronted about them, and said they appear to be flying, quote, very near to aircraft, and important targets such as military and nuclear facilities. Hmm. I will say that that suggests intelligence gathering. Yeah, it does. Yeah. I mean, now, of course, see, this is where UFOs, I don't know. What's your stance on aliens, UFOs stuff, Chell? You know, I really don't know.

You don't know what your stance is? Yeah, actually. Um, Like maybe there's things, but maybe there's not things and it's all other governments things. Or maybe most of the time people are just confused about what things are. And it's really just SpaceX launches. They do launch a lot. And it looks weird. And I know because I look on Reddit and people are like, what is this? And they're like, it's a SpaceX launch. I'm not an alien. I promise. Sounds like stuff aliens would say. Yeah. So I don't really know where I stand about, if I think.

I mean, I think there's probably life in the universe, but I don't know where I stand about it being here. You're just not convinced we're alive? Yeah, exactly. I might think there's life in the universe? Maybe. I mean, I'm not convinced we're not already dead and this is like a ghost planet or something. Ooh, ghost planet, like Echoes. Yeah. Okay. Well, for me... I was always really into UFOs when I was a kid. I'm like very, very into it. And I don't just mean like I, you know, watch the X-Files. I like would check out books from the library about UFOs and read them cover to cover.

And I've always thought it was interesting. The idea that, you know, there's aliens visiting. I don't think it's very likely. Yeah. Only because, well, okay, I'll put it a better way. I think it is more likely that aliens are visiting the, and we don't know, then I would put it that aliens are visiting and the government knows and is accomplishing the greatest coverup in the history of all humankind. That's kind of where I stand. Cause like this whole idea, like the government knows and they're just keeping a secret. I'm like, they are so good at keeping secrets.

Just tell Chelsea Manning and Edward Snowden how good they are at keeping secrets. Yeah. Edward Snowden even said when he was working for the intelligence agencies in the NSA that that he looked for UFO stuff because he was curious and he didn't find anything. Okay. So yeah. What if the aliens have brainwashing technology? So every time somebody finds out who would spill this, they just zap it out of their heads. And it sounds like men in black with one extra step. Yeah. No, I mean, you know, uh, that's kind of, that's kind of my problem with the discourse on this topic in general is that, I mean, you were, you know, being somewhat silly, maybe, or maybe you really desperately believe this, but a lot of times the counterpoints will be like, but what if another thing that you have to decide if you believe is real is real and that's why it works.

And I'm always like, that's not, So if I, you know, if I say like, it looks like they're gathering intelligence and then somebody's like, oh, so aliens are gathering intelligence on us. I'm like, well, that, see, that's the part that's the problem. Intelligence gathering makes sense and we're aware of it. Like of the concept that you need to be close to something to gather intelligence on it. But then if you want to go to its aliens, that's a whole way bigger leap than it being like spy craft or something. And that's, that's kind of where especially in the modern era when people are saying like, but there's so many unidentified things and dah, dah, dah, dah.

I'm like, yeah. I mean, we're in an unbelievably advanced technological time period. Like why wouldn't foreign governments be able to build something that might surprise you? Also, if it is like, if the, like, you know, supposed like black pyramid ships and stuff, If they are real, I wouldn't be surprised if they were the U S government testing them from such a secret layer that like the air force and the Navy don't know about them. And that's why the reports don't get taken seriously because once it goes up the chain enough, somebody goes, Oh, I know what they are, but I can't ever say that.

So I say nothing. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's, it's possible. I mean, the other thing that bothers me is I think that, I mean, I, I like, I think a lot of things are just totally misidentified as normal, like normal things. I see a lot like in those kind of clip shows and stuff where someone will be like, I saw the thing, but it didn't make any noise when it was in the sky. And it's like, if it's up high enough, like, and it's like a drone, you're just not going to hear it. They're not that loud.

Sorry, guys. No, and that's kind of the thing. I appreciate the enthusiasm and excitement about the idea of aliens visiting. But the other problem is you get into a slippery slope once you start saying, and they're being perfectly hidden by the government. Because Snowden said that when he looked to see what was in there, he said that either there's no alien secrets or it's an incredibly secret cover-up that there's not even a morsel of it. in the full NSA and CIA database. So my point is like, they could like, you end up going down a very scary rabbit hole very quickly because you say like, well, what about all these other leaks?

Oh, they were all false flags. Those were all fake or done on purpose to make us believe the government has a fallibility to When in reality, they're perfect at doing everything. Like, they don't have leaks. They don't have problems with competence, which governments have massive competency problems. No, they don't have any of those. It's all a psyop. Well, then it becomes, oh, well, if they're that good, why don't they just actually do a good job at everything they're. Too busy they're too busy doing all these psyops i don't understand there's no time to save the.

World oh i don't even save the world how about just like uh you know issue a passport in three days no it Too busy. We have to look, we have to look in confident by being confident, but not confident enough. See, that's, and that's, that's really my point. But then the slippery slope gets way worse because then when you say like, well, why don't they like make our lives better? Then usually you land on because they don't want our lives to be better. Yeah. And then, and I'm just going to say it. I don't care anymore.

Um, because I really don't like, uh, the era of conspiracy theorists that like were big when you and I were kids always led to the Illuminati. Almost always there are conspiracy theories now that are a little bit less tied strictly to Illuminati. Like, you know, there'll be conspiracies about like fluoride or food in the water or food, things in food, food in the water, things that don't necessarily have to go all the way up that chain. But in general, with these kinds of claims, uh, the slippery slope is that if you take it far enough, you'll, you'll realize that the people who've thought about it enough have already landed on that.

It's Jews, that it's a Jewish cabal controlling the planet because whenever you get to Illuminati and lizard people, it's always, it's, it's always like, then it's the Rothschilds and the frigging international banking system. And that's why I think it's really important to just go. That's, it's not reasonable to, to argue these points. It's like, I used to say like, uh, you know, all we're doing is arguing the color of unicorns or all we're doing is saying, did you know that the new evidence that Bigfoot exists is it shares 20% of its DNA with the Loch Ness monster.

You're like that. I'm sorry. That doesn't count as information for me personally. Like it just doesn't work if I don't believe in that thing. Yeah. So that's where it gets, it gets tricky too, is like, if this coverup is so massive and so perfect that, then you end up asking so many questions that a lot of times the only way to have answers that keep it in the affirmative of these are aliens is to end up in a worldview that is really not okay to me, I think. Of course, then some people might say, that's just because you're afraid to know the truth.

Maybe, or maybe you're just a really long-winded anti-Semite. I don't know. On that note, we're... I mean, I could just be an alien. That would be so cool. But you would have told me by now. You don't know that. I do. Oh. Because I would have come to you and been like really depressed about it and be like, hey, hey, it's okay. Look, check this out. And you just like take your human head off and be like, look, I'm an alien. Just to cheer me up. That's the person you are. Oh, that's nice of me.

Not true. Well, we're going to take a quick break. And when we get back, we'll look a little bit more into this Euro news story right after this. All right, Chell, we're back. Finishing up this news story from Euronews.com all about UFOs, not UAPs. Oh, and then I lose my spot right after I make my friggin' solid point. Yeah. Oh, man, I really lost it entirely. There it is. They noted that, quote, this is talking about the duo from Malaysia who have the UV infrared telescopes. The family duo sent 37 sky and space footage images to the commission, including alleged UAPs, and asked President Ursula von der Leyen about their origins.

They noted that, quote, all governments simply have no opinions. We have also detected various signals from up above through the local Wi-Fi frequencies, the Malaysian duo wrote. Since these UAPs were spotted over Malaysia, the commission would have no authority to investigate the matter, the EU executive responded. That's what we said at the beginning. We were like, why are we talking about Malaysia? This article is about. The European Union. However, the commission said it would propose to its 27 member states to, quote, increase ability to detect objects in space environments around Earth. This is, quote, this is partly to help us better identify the UAPs that you have seen and many pieces of space debris that endanger the many users of space, or uses of space.

Oh man, that would have been better. Sorry, users of space would have been better. We do not claim that in the future this will solve all cases like those you have reported, but maybe some of them. The Malaysian amateur astronomer also reached out to NASA, the Director General of the Malaysian Nuclear Agency, Abdul Rahim Haroon, and Malaysian Ministry of Science, Technology, and Innovation, and the Canadian Defense Ministry, all entities politely shunned the appeal. I was about to wonder why this Malaysian duo sent one just to Europe, but now it makes sense. Oh, they didn't send it only to Europe.

They just sent it to everybody. Former Canadian military police Larry McGuire, who was also approached in... I don't think it's military police. I think MP might stand for something else. Whatever, MP. individually by the Malaysians, encouraged the pair. Quote, I suspect that more and more people around the world will be turning their attention to the skies and will be collecting even more data and recordings in the coming year, Maguire wrote in an email in June of 2022. At the end of the day, the skies aren't classified, and as more information is collected, it will lead to more public awareness of the issue.

All right. So now are you fully convinced? Yeah, that was all the talk. Yeah. Man. That was easy. Yeah. Too easy. Well, now we're going to head back to the States and to the delightful state of Connecticut. Wow. You like Connecticut, right? Yes. Yeah. Have you ever spent any time there? Um, uh, not, I mean a little bit. I have some family that lives there. Oh really? Yeah. Yeah, I mean, just in the part of Connecticut that's right by New York. Basically all of it. Yes, I know. But yeah, I mean, yeah, that's all I have.

Well, my grandparents lived there for like 20 years, so I used to spend time. They lived in Waterbury, Connecticut. And I used to get dropped off with them and spend like a few days with them. And then I'd go see my dad because he was in New Hampshire. So it was only a little ways further. But this is local 12.com reporting Bigfoot spotted in Connecticut. Researchers say sighting is credible. I say, no, that'd be awesome. And that's the article. Sorry. We're that efficient. Yeah. A reported Bigfoot sighting in rural Connecticut is generating buzz after a national research organization deemed the eyewitness account credible and though many local residents remain unconvinced.

The Bigfoot Field Research Organization, BFRO, said the sighting occurred during the early morning hours of July 5th near Potchog State Forest, Connecticut's largest state forest. According to the organization, the witness provided such a detailed description that investigators gave the report their highest level of credibility. We gave it four chupacabras out of six. Our highest rating. Wow. I like that they'd measure it in chupacabras. Me too, I guess. Despite that assessment, neighbors interviewed by WTIC expressed skepticism. Quote, anything's possible these days, but, you know, I've never seen a Bigfoot, resident Peter Gautieri said. I like that he said anything's possible these days.

I know what he means, but I like to think he means what with gene splicing technology that you can buy off Amazon, I imagine any person could invent a big foot or big feet. Yeah. I'd like to imagine that he's just like an incurably insane crank and not just a regular guy saying anything's possible these days. Yeah. He's like, I have a lot of opinions. Why don't you come and look at this wall I've painted with all of my facts? Yeah. Another nearby resident who asked not to be identified suggested shadows, fatigue, and darkness can play tricks on people's perception.

So the person with the most reasonable comment is the one who's like, I don't want anybody to know that is who I am. Okay. I don't want anyone to know. I don't believe in Bigfoot. I don't want anybody to know that. I believe shadows, fatigue, and darkness can play tricks on people's perception. It's just, I don't know. I'm not comfortable with that being out in the world. It's a big deal. Quote, we live in a society with cameras and recording devices and sensors everywhere. The resident said to say that something is escaping everyone nationwide. Oh, that's a horrible place to put the resident said to say that something is escaping everyone nationwide.

Okay. I see what the, um, Still, some longtime residents say the dense woods of Potchog State Forest, which spans more than 26,000 acres, would be as likely a place as any if Bigfoot exists. Do you think it's in Connecticut? I don't see why not. And I remember that I actually played a bunch of shows in New Haven. Oh, New Haven, nice. Yeah, I like Connecticut. So if they want to have a Bigfoot, they can have a Bigfoot, I guess. Especially in this day and age. In this day and age. That was a good tag. Quote, every once in a while, if it's really quiet and still, you'll hear a branch pop in the distance.

Resident Richard Fedor said, it makes you wonder. Trees. Now, I want to talk about what we really need to be discussing if Bigfoot is indeed being sighted in Connecticut. So, New York has become so expensive and so full of government bloat that even Sasquatch is heading to Connecticut. not Jersey. Cause he's not allowed there anymore. Yeah. I mean, that's what it says to me. That's what this reads as to me is like, Bigfoot is like, I can't afford real estate here. The zoning is too intense. I'm going elsewhere. I mean, you can believe what you want, but the, the fucking people from the Bronx river zoo just, I'm for the Bronx who just found, um, otters in the Bronx river for the first time since the 1800s.

So yeah, But has anyone checked before? Yeah. They've been checking. Name the last time they checked before the time they found them. This person who was checking has been checking since 2019. That's not even that long. It's like a bunch of years. Yeah, but how long was it that you said that they hadn't been there? Since the 1800s. Yeah, see? That's an awfully big gap. Fine. I'm just saying. Fine. Fine. I'm not trying to be difficult, but that's a little scurrilous. I'm just saying that nature is healing, so Bigfoot can come back to New York now.

Oh, I didn't say anything about nature. I said that the tax situation and inflation and how far your dollar can go is the problem. Even Sasquatch is like, I am not paying that amount of money to live in a converted walk-in closet. I mean, I feel like if the river otters are okay with it. That's completely different because they live in the water. Bigfoot might live in the water. We don't know anything about them. If Bigfoot lived in the water, we would know by now because that guy's been checking since 2019. That's true. We're going to take a quick break.

And when we get back, we'll talk about scientists discovering a mystery molecule right after this. Okay, Chell. Now we're headed to space.com. Yeah. You subscribe to space.com, don't you? Sure, I guess. Oh, now all of a sudden you're going to be coy about it? Yeah, I don't know. Do I? I don't think so. Oh, man. Methink the lady doth protest too much. Or something. The headline is Scientists Discover Mystery Molecule on Pluto and Saturn's Moon, Titan. We cannot say what it is. Oh, no. Separated by billions of miles and shaped by very different environments, Saturn's smoggy moon, Titan, and the dwarf planet, Pluto, have, on paper, very little in common, which is why they'll be great in a sitcom as roommates.

Yay! Titan is a geologically active world cloaked in an atmosphere denser than Earth's. Its landscape shaped by seas of liquid methane and vast dunes built from organic particles that rain out of its skies. Pluto, by contrast, is. A frigid outpost with a tenuous atmosphere hovering. Above an icy, frozen surface. Yet observations from the James Webb Space Telescope have revealed these two disparate worlds share an identical, unexplained infrared signature on their surfaces, a sign that similar chemistry may be unfolding on both planets despite their stark differences. Okay. Maybe we're not so different after all. You know, maybe we can learn to get along.

Yeah, I mean, that's the whole point of the sitcom, so.. Detailed in a new study, the feature appears at precisely the same infrared wavelength on both Titan and Pluto, indicating that it absorbs light identically on both worlds. The signal points to the presence of an unknown compound or a family of related compounds that scientists have yet to identify. That's cool that it might be a family. Oh, if there's, wait, so if they're, If there's family, a family on Titan, then that would suggest that almost certainly Fast and the Furious is on Titan. Because that's about family.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Bitchin'. That's totally how that works. Yeah. Yeah. If you watched a few of those movies, you'd understand family. Family. Yeah, I guess so. Family. Family. Detailed in a new study, the feature appears... Oh, I said that part. Quote, it's rather mysterious, Bruno Bazzard, a planetary scientist at the Paris Observatory who led the discovery, told Space.com. We cannot say what it is. Bazzard first spotted the unexplained feature while analyzing Titan observations from November 22nd, or 2022, when the JWST gathered infrared light leaking through the haze in very specific narrow wavelength bands. allowing scientists to peer directly through the otherwise opaque atmosphere.

To make sense of this light, researchers rely on spectroscopy. This is a problem in the English language. It's thermometer, not thermometer. But you can never guess. Spectroscopy? But it's probably not pronounced that way. It's probably spectroscopy? I don't know which one it is. A technique used to identify compounds by the specific wavelengths of light they absorb. Because every molecule leaves behind a unique spectral fingerprint that telescopes can detect, astronomers can routinely identify substances across the solar system and beyond, ranging from simple water ice to complex molecules. Aw, man, they got water ice over there. Yay!

Yeah! Yay! Oh, my local dairy dream... Just introduced Philadelphia Water Ice. They sell Philadelphia Water Ice now. Wow. Yeah, and it's like a brand. Wow. Like it's at Philadelphia Water Ice TM. Huh. They even trademarked it. I know. I mean, you'd think people would just be afraid of the Philly people enough to be like, oh, they'll enforce it themselves and we don't want that. Mm-hmm. And my local Dairy Dream just expanded to a second location after like 90 years of being in my neighborhood. And guess what that new location is? I don't know. It's where the random Rita Water Ice used to be by me.

That place, it closed about a year ago. And now they're operating Philadelphia Water Ice and their Dairy Dream in the same building. Weird. And there's a Rita's now like 10 minutes away from that. So we still have a Rita's and we're like the furthest West Rita's in Ohio. Like it's, I always joke that it was like a hurricane blew through and when it left, it just left a Rita's here. So they just stayed for those who aren't from or haven't spent time on the East coast. Rita's is a water ice and custard business that I'm, I could really go for a Rita's right now.

Yeah. A water ice. But yeah, it's like I saw water ice. I was like, Oh no. Got to get a water ice. Yeah. I'm also like 39 hours into a fast, so I kind of want to eat anything. Let's see. But the newly detected feature neither matches any of the standard library spectra catalogs so far, nor does it appear to be a fluke of the hardware. The study notes the exact same absorption feature was detected by two different JWST instruments, the near infrared spectrograph and and the mid-infrared instrument, ruling out the possibility of an instrumental artifact.

It is wild that we have telescopes that can kind of sort of tell what a molecule is. Yeah, it reminds me of those lasers that can tell you what kind of drugs things are. I haven't seen those. Oh yeah, you can, there's like a thing, and I feel like it's called a Gemini too, which is not related to the thing on the, you know. To Google? Yes. Oh, so it works? Yeah. Instead of being Gemini? Yeah. So what you do is you take your drugs and you stick this laser at them and it tells you what kind of drugs you have.

Oh. It's really cool. And it's probably meth, by the way. I thought now it's probably fentanyl. Well, actually, usually it's cocaine. Really? Yeah. I've always heard that when people get drugs and they turn out to not be the drug they thought it was, it's almost always fentanyl. Oh, oh, no, this is the government. This isn't, like, you playing around. Oh! See, when I think of drug testing, I think of, like, of testing your drugs, rather. I think of, like, people who want to make sure that what they've bought is not, you know, tainted, because they sell those.

Yeah, this is probably more expensive than that. Yeah, it sounds it. Yeah, it's like a big box, and it's got, like, a laser connected, and you stick it on drugs. But now my question is, Should they use that machine and connect it to one of these machines to make sure that the thing over there isn't fentanyl? Because maybe that's what it is. Because fent seems to be everywhere these days, right? But isn't, I don't think it can be there. I mean, it's possible. In this day and age. How do we know it's not something else?

Like fentanyl, but not. Like not fentanyl? Like what we mix fentanyl with in Philly. What do you guys mix fentanyl with in Philly? That horse tranquilizer. Oh, ketamine? I don't think so. Maybe. But we call it trank. And then your arms fall off. That's not funny. Why are you laughing? I'm so sorry. It's okay if they're mad they can't shut the podcast off. Their arms fell off. No, it's really, really bad. It sounds bad. Yeah. You like lose circulation and then your body parts rot and fall off. Maybe I don't want to come for a visit the second I get a new car.

It's okay. I mean, don't want to be running over any severed arms in the streets. Well, I mean, they probably wouldn't really like arms anymore. Oh, okay. At least there's that. Yeah. After failing to find a match with the catalog's spectral fingerprints of the simplest and most common planetary ices, Bazzard wondered whether another world with similar atmospheric chemistry might hold a clue. He turned to his colleague Emmanuel Lelouch of the Paris Observatory, who had just led a JWST program that had observed Pluto in May of 2023. Quote, I asked him, do you have a signature on Pluto at this exact wavelength?

Bizaard recalled in the interview with Space.com, so we looked around and found that it was present there. There is no evidence that the mystery molecule is a biosignature, Bizaard said. Instead, it is likely reflecting the kind of prebiotic chemistry that has been operating in Titan's oxygen-free environment for more than four billion years. So it's kombucha. Hmm. Because it said prebiotic. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Sounds like that's, that sounds like kombucha or booch as the cool people call it. Going to slam some booch. They, I mean, they might, I don't know. I'm not cool. Do you, do you don't drink kombucha?

No. Have you had it before? Yes. Did you not like it? Yes. It tastes like vinegar. Yeah. I think it might be, there might be some in there. I think that's how that goes, but it's just like, eh. I don't really need this in my life. I am the kind of person who prides myself on collecting acquired tastes, but I just, I mean, I could, I could start to like, think it was okay, but I just, it just wasn't, it didn't stick around for me. No, it's just, it's just not very good. Sorry. Wow. First, she makes fun of drug addicts losing their arms and now she insults kombucha.

I'm so sorry. I just didn't know I was going to say that, so I got really giggly about it. That's why. It wasn't because you think it's absurdly funny. It is not funny at all. You heard it here first, folks. She didn't think it was funny, and that's why she laughed. Oh, my God. This is.. Well, go ahead. No, no, no. No, say your piece. No, just go to commercial. Cut to commercial. Chell, you're going to be very excited. Okay. This is from thecourier.co.uk, and the headline is Mystery Big Cat Spotted Near Dundee Stuns Locals.

They don't have big cats. A mystery, quote, big cat spotted prowling around a trout fishery near Dundee has sparked a huge online debate. The striking feline was filmed at Ladyat Trout Fishery near Lundy, with footage of the animal quickly spreading across social media. Almost a half a million people have now viewed the 13-second clip. Fishery owner David Duff said the animal has been living around the site for around 18 months and is regularly spotted by staff and customers. Okay. What about this is getting you? It's just a large house cat, probably. No, it is. The photo is of a large house cat.

Wow. That's great. That is literally like it looks like a kitty. Aw. But some people, I guess, disagree with me. It just looks like a kitty to me. He said he has also been appearing on security cameras and believes it's been hunting rabbits around the fishery. Exactly what the animal is remains a mystery, although Mr. Duff told the courier he believes it is a larger-than-ordinary domestic cat. Okay, that's what I think, too. He said, quote... Sorry. I'm gonna... I need you to understand why I laughed at this. Okay. Although Mr. Duff told the courier he believes it is a larger-than-ordinary domestic cat, he said, quote, he's a lot bigger than a cat.

That is solid reporting. Yeah, that's what that means. That's like those movie trailers where it's like, he was above the law. I'm above the law. He was out for revenge. I'm out for revenge. Yeah. Quote, he's not a vegetarian. I can assure you that. He's just spectacular. Mr. Duff added, a lot of people are saying it's a Bengal cat. My experience of cats is very limited, but I've Googled it, and when you see him up close, he's definitely striped. Whether he's a cross, an escaped cat, or a very expensive pet that's become wild, it doesn't matter to me.

He's chosen Ladyat as his home. The latest footage was captured by David after he spotted the animal from his balcony overlooking the water. He said the cat was sitting in a hunting position before eventually disappearing into the bushes. The sighting has prompted a debate online with a flurry of viewers offering their own theories about the animal's identity. Mr. Duff said, quote, it's all over the world. It's just short of a half a million views. The top countries at the moment are the UK, Ireland, and the United States. Everyone's a Facebook expert. They're all very happy to dish up their opinion on it.

And I think it's fantastic. Aww. What are your thoughts on this cat-related story? It's a cat. I don't know. I mean... I can't see the cat, so I have to just imagine what it looks like. I know it's striped. It looks like a cat. Yeah, I think it's just a very large cat. They can get big, and it could eat bunnies or, you know, rodents, I guess. Definitely eat bunnies. Just living outside, doing its life things, getting attention from the internet. Sounds like good stuff. Sounds like a cat to me. Yeah. Despite the speculation, Mr.

Duff said the footage alone was not enough to establish the animal's size or species. The fishery owner believes the surrounding countryside provides the perfect habitat for a predator. He said, quote, when you look at the wildcat habitat, it's perfect for it. There are lots of... What is with this reporting? They say what he said, then they have the quote of him saying it. Yeah. there's lots of trees, forest, and wild grass, and there are lots of wild animals here. It's just perfect for a cat to live. Yeah, that's what he said. David said the mystery feline was just the latest example of the wildlife attracted to the area.

He added, quote, we have ospreys, rare bats, and rare birds flying around. Just a mecca for wildlife. And to me, this is just the cherry on top. He does sound like a fun guy. He sounds like he's really happy about everything. Yeah. So I'm happy for him. Just fantastic. Yeah, he's got a fun cat and he's got like ospreys or whatever. So. It's a sign that the environment I'm looking after is in pristine condition, he said. A cat and a little fishery in the middle of nowhere has caught the attention. It's just phenomenal. Hold on, I guess.

Yeah, people are like, they're saying it looks like a Scottish wildcat. I don't know what that I don't know what that is. I usually don't look at the comment section, but since it was about cats, I was like, nobody's going to be mean. It's just going to be people going, I like cats and I'm afraid of the backlash. It does kind of look like a Scottish wildcat. I don't know what that is. Oh my gosh. I guess. I mean, you can Google it. You don't have to. I mean, it's just, we're just doing a show.

But I'm not supposed to do things when I'm doing the show. You don't know that. Didn't you tell me like 10 times last time? Stop doing things while we're doing the show. Yeah, but you were like painting and trying to make a smoothie in the blender. Oh, so this is okay, but that's not? Because this is related. Oh. And slightly less noisy. The smoothie was related. Oh, it was? I don't remember what it was related to, but it was related. It could be. I mean, a Scottish wildcat is like super fucking cute, but it also looks like kind of a domestic cat with like a rounder face.

So I would love to have it. You would love to have it? It's really cute. But why would you take it away when it's living its best life killing stuff? Oh, I wasn't. I think what I really meant is I just want to like pet it. Oh, yeah. I don't like want it in my house. Oh, you want to pet it? I thought it's not a snake. Why would you want to pet it? Because it's also soft. Well, kids, we're going to take a quick break. But when we get back, we're going to talk about a strange Milky Way planetary system that's leaving scientists puzzled.

Right after this. Chell, when you think of the Milky Way, what do you imagine? Like stars. Stars? Like some sort of thing that's up there that makes it that thing. And then some planets. Yeah. And then planets. Planets are in there, though. Planets. Okay. Okay, well... This article from Reuters says, Strange Milky Way planetary system leaves scientists puzzled. Oh. Yeah. Scientists are documenting a planetary system in the Milky Way galaxy that is so starkly dissimilar to our own solar system that they are struggling to find the proper terminology to describe it. Wow. I don't know what that means.

And they don't either, apparently. It's like, Like, it's like, hmm. It's like, you know, you know, it's big. Yeah, it's big. It's really big. Wow. And in space. Yeah, it's in space. Maybe the scientists they were talking to just had like a really big lunch and were kind of slow coming off it. And that's why when they wrote this article. The system includes a red dwarf star about 40% of the mass of our sun that is orbited by a brown dwarf, a celestial body that blurs the line between planet and star. The brown dwarf in turn is orbited by a gaseous Jupiter-sized world.

Michelle's like trying to figure this out. I got it. Newly discovered using the European Southern Observatory's Chile-based Very Large Telescope. That's literally... It's called a Very Large Telescope. Each word was capitalized, so I think that's literally the name, Very Large Telescope. Wow. Lucky. Using our solar system as a definitional frame of reference, a body that orbits another body that orbits a star should be called a moon, or in this case, an exomoon, because it's beyond our solar system. But... The object that orbits the brown dwarf is unlikely any of the many moons in our solar system, all of which are relatively small, rocky, or icy worlds, in terms of composition and size, at least.

So what should we call it? Quote, this will certainly be a matter of debate. In general, most astronomers are fine with the term exosatellite, at least as a placeholder until we formally adopt definitions for objects like the one we found, said Kevin Hoy, a doctoral student in astrophysics at the Universidad Diego Portaz in Chile, also affiliated with the ExoMoon research group YEMS, lead author of the study published in the Journal of Nature. What do you think we should call it, Michelle? Um, like, uh, I think we should just call it a moon and just deal with the fact that it's not like another moon that we've dealt with before.

It's just a moon. It's going to be a moon now. But if it's a moon, moon refers to being in our solar system. Oh, it's the exomoon or whatever the fuck we just said it was. That's a really boring answer. You know what? You just want me to make up a name for its name is Sam. That's what they're going to do there. Yeah. Sam. satellite augmented moon oh you did it you did it damn that was easy why are they complaining i. Don't know this doesn't seem hard. At all i guess see i was gonna if you won but i i had my idea because it's exo moon i was gonna go with ecto moon like ecto cooler oh okay you know like the high c that we would drink when we were kids that was delicious.

I don't actually know if I ever had it. I just know it existed. You never had juice boxes? No, I did. I just don't know if I ever had the Ecto Cooler one. Were you ever happy as a child? No. Then you never had it. Yeah. That's the easiest way to know. You would have been happy at least once. Oh. Sorry, pal. That's okay. Quote, we're really hitting the limits of how far we can stretch the words we invented to describe. So it's just funny because the words we invented. Yeah, you can do whatever you want with them.

To describe the solar system and other systems in this case, Hoy said. This system is about 71 light years away from Earth. A light year is the distance light travels in a year, 5.9 trillion miles or 9.5 trillion kilometers. It's pretty interesting. I wonder what it's like there. Probably hot or very cold. And there's no air. Oh, because there's no air. Oh. Quote, I think this discovery is open to Pandora's box for the scientific community. This type of object is completely new and unusual, truly different from what we were familiar with in our solar system.

Now we will have to understand through theoretical models how these kinds of objects form, whether they are common or not, said study co-author Alice Zerlo at Universidad Diego Portales, astrophysicist and YEM's director. I thought you were raising your hand. Oh, sorry. I was just thinking about how it works. Michelle's, like, miming galaxies above her. I have to, like... Yeah, I have to, like, tactilely. Figure it out. Okay. I mean, fair enough. Whatever helps. Yeah, I was just thinking that that means they have two suns. Yeah. Except one sun is orbiting a celestial body. Yes, but it'd still be, like, two suns.

Oh, I'm not disagreeing. I'm just saying, like, but that makes it even weirder. That would be like having a sun... that's orbiting a planet that the planet is orbiting a sun. It's like a turducken. Yeah. You know, suns and a planet. Yeah. But otherwise identical. Yeah. Quote. Oh man. They're, they're coming at you. Chell. What? Quote. We deliberately chose not to call it a moon. Fuck you. Man. Chell's dropped like three F bombs this week or this month. And usually she maybe drops one at most. She's aggro. That's because this object is unlike any moon in our solar system.

It's much more massive, and it doesn't orbit a planet. That's a really good point. But they said that the brown dwarf is kind of a cross between a planet and the sun. And the star, yeah. So, like, that doesn't count now? Well, I'll let them finish. It orbits a brown dwarf, an object that's somewhere between a planet and a star. Since we've never seen a system quite like this before, we're still figuring out the best way to describe it. And Michelle didn't even really finish college, Zerlo said. I finished college. Where's your diploma? What? Where's your diploma?

I don't know. There we have it, everybody. I think it's probably upstairs somewhere. I don't know. What were you going to say before that? Oh, I have no idea. That's good. While more than 6,300 exoplanets, as planets outside our solar system are known, have been discovered, finding exomoons has proved more challenging with only a few good candidates identified. The researchers are trying to figure out the origins of the exosatellite. Quote, it may have formed from the disk of gas and dust around the brown dwarf just as planets form around stars. Or it may have been captured gravitationally by the brown dwarf later on, Zerlo said.

A brown dwarf is neither a star nor a planet, but something in between. They could be considered aspiring stars that during their formative stages did not reach the mass necessary to ignite nuclear fusion at their core, like a star. But they are more massive than the biggest of planets. Oh, so they're just like a really big planet? I guess so. Oh, I thought maybe they were on fire, but it sounds like they're not on fire. I mean, they could be a little on fire, like Mercury's a little on fire. I don't know. Actually, I think Mercury's a lot on fire.

I think Venus is a little on fire. Okay. Okay. Quote, because the system is very young, the brown dwarf is still shining with the heat left from its formation, Zerlo said. Okay, so it's still hot. Since the first detection of exoplanets in the 1990s, scientists have spotted a wide variety of planetary systems, some built much like our own and others quite different. The one examined in the new research is an outlier. Quote, this is the best quote ever. Quote, yep, this system is definitely weird. There was likely a pretty chaotic dynamical history that left it in its current state, but it's really hard to tell exactly what kind of chaos it went through.

Hoy said. Why is your hand on your chest? It went through so much. It went through so much, but look how strong it is. Yeah. Bigger than any planet ever. Yeah. Yeah. I just love that. It's like you're quoting somebody in a story and you decide to leave in. Yep. Yep. Yep. This system is definitely weird. They just felt like it wasn't complete otherwise. I guess so. I guess you're right. It must be nice to be right. Ever. No. No. I'm jealous. So, you're going with Sam? Sure. I don't care. They didn't like that I wanted to call it a moon, so now I am angry.

You know... This is the problem with giving Michelle criticism is she always agrees with you until she doesn't. Then all of a sudden she's like ready to die on a hill. I don't, I don't care. I think you're just saying that as cope now. I don't care. Oh, that was more convincing. That second one was much more convincing. Good. I don't care anymore. Okay. Okay. We all believe you don't care. Okay. Do you feel better? No. You're supposed to not care! Oh, I caught you. I caught you. You fell for it. Bamboozled again. Sorry, bro.

I owe it to my listeners to get to the bottom of this, and that's why I did it. Well, when we come back, we're going to talk about the internet sensation that's been sweeping the nation. And it's a little weird raccoon. Oh, weird. Oh, man, Michelle's going to be mad. This is going to be even better than I thought right after this. All right, we're back and heading to theguardian.com for a headline that says, Who is Jimothy? Seven things you need to know about the Internet's favorite raccoon. And for those who don't know, Jimothy has become a pretty big sensation.

Um, he is a raccoon with a spinal disorder. Oh, that makes him look like a little ball. Yeah. So Chell, when we started, when I told her that we were going to talk about Jimothy, she was like, Oh, I've just heard about it or whatever. And then you're like, I never saw a picture of him. So I sent you a link and then you looked at more picture of you're like, Oh my God, you're literally like exactly what everybody else reacted as. Yeah. I'm watching a video of him like moving around and stuff. He's amazing.

I don't know. I don't have anything mean to say about him ever again. Look at him go. As of today, the internet belongs to Jimothy, a raccoon with a striking silhouette who has gone from a minor celebrity in Seattle to social media main character overnight. Jimothy is suddenly all over Instagram, and if you hover over the critter for so much as a nanosecond, he will be all you will ever see on your feed. Oh. Oh, it's okay. You're like, I'm fine with that. Yeah, yeah. So what is the deal with Jimothy? What's the reason for his unique appearance, and what's behind his rapid rise from contested local pest, or compested local test, to celebrated internet pet?

Jimothy is said to be a familiar sight in the Bellard neighborhood of Seattle, instantly recognizable by his unusual short, round shape. Chell is like cheesing. She is smiling so big. Sorry, I was just looking at him. He was walking around. Last week, Seattle resident Kiana Hall saw the raccoon while on an evening walk with her husband. She posted a video of him scampering across her path on Instagram with her exclaiming in the voiceover, What am I looking at? Hall gave the creature a name, declaring that she and her husband had been graced with the presence of Jimothy.

for their 13th anniversary. Aw. Quote, He looked like a Jimothy to me, Hall later told Today. I don't have any other explanation. The raccoon's unique shape generated instant intrigue and conversation, leading Instagram to push the video and send it viral. According to Know Your Meme, Hall's video gained nearly 400,000 likes in six days. At the time of writing, it has been viewed nearly 8 million times. Wow. So you are very happy that you've gotten to look at more Jimothy, huh? Yeah. Cause I didn't know what he was. I mean, I knew he was a raccoon, but that's all I knew.

See, it figures this had to happen this late in the year. Cause I would have gotten you Jimothy merch for your birthday. Cause like, cause you're hard to buy for, but I could have got, there's so much Jimothy merch. There's no shortage of Jimothy shirts and stickers and buttons and mugs. Wow. So, Oh, a side note from, since my car is going to be here soon, I went ahead and ordered a brand new Klingon Empire Star Trek sticker for my window. Cause I had a window. I've had a Klingon window decal on all three. Now it'll be all three of the cars I've owned.

Yay. And I bought a Bajoran one too. Cause I was feeling really nerdy and I want to put that on the other side. So people can be like, what's that? And I'll be like, you wouldn't understand. You're not a friend of the prophets. Yeah. Yeah. Back to things that people want to hear about. What may set Jimothy apart in the Internet's archive of furry favorites is the speed and scale of his ascent. Two weeks ago, he didn't have a name, nor did he have a reputation beyond the bins of an area of Seattle. Now his viral fame has made him a hometown hero, with the Mariners last week encouraging fans in the stadium to, quote, make noise for Jimothy.

A mural of the raccoon has already been painted in his neighborhood depicting him hiding behind a bin at a pottery studio. While a painting of Jimothy raised $ 6, 500 for a local food bank at auction. Wow. On Sunday, city council member Alexis Mercedes-Rink will issue an, quote, official city proclamation celebrating the, quote, majestic raccoon and declaring summer 2026 Jimothy Summer. Wow. Which sounds like a host of a game show. Yes, it does. I'm Jimothy Summer, and welcome back to Guess That Number, the game show that has no strategy whatsoever. Anyway, Jimothy Summer. Online, Jimothy has a dedicated fandom Reddit.

Drawing tens of thousands of weekly visitors, he has been commemorated in fan art, endless memes, gaming tributes, including his own 8-bit video game. A custom Lego build and, unbelievably, at least two tattoos. Wow. On Monday, Jimothy was featured on The Daily Show. Oh, I guess that's still a relevant thing. The same day, he was invoked from space with NASA posting an Instagram picture of Seattle taken from the International Space Station that highlighted the home of the iconic raccoon. And with a quote, Jimothy runs this city. Wow. You know, it's a, it's amazing how much people will grab onto some damn fun and good.

Like we all need some fun. Like in my area, it was so long ago. Now I'm having trouble remembering the name, but like two years ago, three years ago, a local township near uh this woman had a 10 foot or seven foot uh werewolf on her lawn and she would decorate it for every time of year it didn't go quite as viral as this but it did go viral but uh but they told her she had to take it down the internet went crazy, like, like attacking the township and saying like, leave that werewolf alone.

And then they started selling t-shirts to raise money for legal defense. If they made them take it down and stuff. I love that stuff. I love when the internet does things like, you know, helps, uh, like a lady bus driver who, or a bus attendant who was being picked on. They, did you remember that? I don't know. This was maybe seven years ago. I don't know. There was this woman, uh, she was a bus attendant, which is just like not a driver, but they sit on the bus and watch after the kids. this video went viral of this teenager insulting her.

Like, like it was really cruel. He was just calling her like ugly and fat and saying like, why can't you get a real job? Why are you here? And it's like, this lady's like in her late sixties or early seventies. He's just like, why don't you have a real job? Are you poor? Are you on welfare? Are you like all this stuff? She starts crying. And at first she just says like, you know, she's just trying to brush him off. Like, Oh, I, you know, blah, blah, blah. She starts crying. The, so the video starts going viral and somebody who knew her, was like, Oh my God, I know her.

She, her husband died like four years ago and she works as a bus monitor just to make ends meet because he can't work here. You know, he's, he was still working. And then they were like, let's put together a, uh, go fund me to send her on a vacation. So they said like, let's raise $ 6, 500 center on vacation. They raised like a quarter of a million dollars. So she retired instead. Oh, good, good. I thought you were going to say, well, then they kept the money, but they gave her the $ 6, 500.

They kept the difference, only fair. Yeah, yeah. But no, so, I mean, that's, I love when the internet does stuff like that. Online, oh, I read that part. Oh, here we go. Naturally, the merchandising machine is leapt to cash in on Jimothy's viral fame. The online marketplace Etsy already has more than 1,000 listings. Wow. Related to the raccoon, including stickers, clothing, and tote bags. Many items championed Jimothy as a struggling iconoclast with faux inspirational mottos such as stay weird, doing my best, and protect at all costs. Also, hot Jimothy summer is also catching on. Little is known about Jimothy's life pre-fame, but last week another Seattle resident identified as Ben Trammell appears to be baby Jimothy with his family.

Wait, what? He posted a video of what appears to be a little confusing. Tramiel claimed Jimothy was born in a group of cedar trees in a neighborhood's backyard or neighbor's backyard. And he saw him almost daily for months. Quote, he was so small and clumsy, but his mother and siblings were always so patient and caring, keeping him from falling and sometimes just carrying him. Jimothy's reported stable early life will no doubt be helping him to navigate his sudden global celebrity life. as well as the crushing silence when the internet moves on. Harsh. Hot Jimothy Summer will inevitably be remembered for about as long as Hot Rat Summer last year.

Also, interestingly enough, born out of Seattle. That kind of makes sense, though, because people are like, Seattle's so weird and fun, it's actually kind of boring. That same year, the city also tried to make Humpy the Salmon happen. That I don't remember. I don't know what that is. Why are they doing animal things there? We don't do animal things here. It's because you guys got Trank. You have your thing. Oh, right. I forgot. Yeah. They have their thing, which is to come up with something desperately. But it's really nice in our thing. It's like, yay, everyone's dying.

That's the difference between Philly and Seattle, man. That's the difference. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's like, that's like saying like, oh, okay. So Oklahoma city's thing is like, you know, a warm bowl of soup and New York city's thing is a punch in the jaw. It's like, yeah, of course it is. That's the difference. I don't know if that's really Oklahoma city's thing. Uh, yeah. Moving on. Jim, Jimothy might be the city's latest, biggest export, but his breakneck rise and commodification speaks loudest to the online economies of attention and and audiences' desperate desire for anything even the slightest bit positive to brighten their timelines.

I think that sounds a little too negative in my opinion, honestly. It sounds really negative. So it's bad that people are happy to see something positive? Like, give me a break. No, people just like positive things. Like back when Upworthy was a website that posted positive things before it became the opposite of that for no apparent reason. Except to make money, I'm sure. Yeah. Yeah. Sorry, I'm mad because I used to love Upworthy, and then one day all they posted was like, these people are all going to die if you don't do something. And I was like, this is not what Upworthy was supposed to be, though.

Anyway. Quote, Jimothy has come to us at a time where everybody needs something to rally around, said the owner of the Ballard Pottery Studio that had the mural painted. The official advice on Jimothy from the Washington Department of Fish and Wildlife, meanwhile, has been to, quote, leave him alone. And I want to point out something. Reason magazine, the libertarian think tank magazine place. They did a whole piece about Jimothy talking about how great he was and how we could all learn a lesson. We could all take the advice of leave him alone. Like just leave everyone alone.

Let's just leave everybody alone. Okay. What were you smiling about? Were you looking at more pictures of Jimothy? I was looking at him walking up some stairs. He's got really big legs. Yeah. They're so cool. Yeah. Well, I'm happy that Michelle is happy. So. We're going to take a break, and when we come back, we're going to talk about the man who's circumnavigating the Arctic Ocean by himself. Wow. Right after this. Chell? Yeah? We're heading to your good buddy, your favorite place, your home away from home, NPR. Wow. Yeah. NPR.org has this headline. But before I get to this, Chelle, you always talk about how much you like to be alone, right?

That's your cope, right? That's what you claim is that it's like it's an on-purpose thing. But you do. You value your alone time, though. I do. You value recharging your battery. Yeah. A lot of people assume because I am very outgoing and stuff that I don't have a battery that needs to be recharged. Which is really interesting because When I hear, I've always believed that there's no real such thing as an extrovert and an introvert. Everybody is a combo of them. It's just, you know, what combo you are is the question. But like, I always hear people say like, oh, well, you know, extroverts, their batteries get charged by being around people.

And sure, but like you can't hang, no person can hang around people for like six hours straight being like intensely engaged the whole time and not be tired and not like want to chill out for a minute. Yeah. Like, yeah. You know, unless you have like a problem, like a serious problem, but, uh, emotional problem or something. Um, but like, yeah. Uh, so that being said, you know, with you enjoying your alone time, would you circumnavigate the Arctic ocean by yourself? Okay. So no. Oh, um, because I've seen people try to do things in, the Arctic and then they die in boat things.

You saw this, like, were you just like there? You were just like, yeah, I was just there. And I was like, I don't know why I'm here, but I, I'm not staying to watch you die, but you're dying in front of me anyway. Yeah. That's too bad. I kind of like, I kind of want to, cause it would be fun, but I feel like I die. So, and I also like watch, I, I know what like the ice flows look like and stuff, And I'm not going to survive an ice pack coming up against my ship.

I mean, you would if you started cold plunging with me. You know, we could do them at the same time via FaceTime. That way you could get yourself cold adapted. No, because the ice pack is going to hit into my ship and it's going to break the hull. And then my ship's going to sink and I'm going to get hypothermia. Even if I'm okay for the first three to seven minutes. I'm not going to make it. Okay. I guess I see your point. What if, what if, what if your second mate was Jimothy with a little hat though?

Like, I don't want to do that to him. You don't want him to have the experience of being your second in command and being trusted to run a boat. You don't want to give him the confidence, the self confidence. And get hypothermia and die? No. That's in there too. No, he can, he can have confidence hanging out in his hometown. Yeah. Like he doesn't need to die in the Arctic with me crying all over him while we die. All right. You've thought about this a lot. So we'll just move. We'll just move on. Okay. NPR.org headline reads, meet the man circumnavigating the Arctic ocean alone.

When sailing alone, even sleep is dangerous. I've actually seen, people have you ever watched there are youtubers i've watched who sail alone like on the ocean they're just like on the ocean alone they sleep for three hours at a time and they literally just tie a rope to the wheel and go that's autopilot and they go to bed. Yeah i don't like that I know, like, when you're on, like, a crab boat and you're crab fishing, like, you normally go to sleep and you ask someone else to, like, watch the wheels so you guys don't die.

Maybe. I don't know. Matt Rutherford knows this all too well as he travels the Arctic far from his home point of Annapolis, Maryland. The moments Rutherford does get to rest are very precious. Quote, it just becomes extremely difficult to get any sleep because if you hit the ice, you essentially die, he said. Like I said, exactly. Rutherford is attempting a maritime first to circumnavigate the Arctic Ocean completely alone, some 10,000 nautical miles in total. The 45-year-old veteran sailor's journey takes him across the North Atlantic along the Russian Arctic coast and eventually through the passage of the Northwest Passage in Canada.

This is the scary part. I, you know, I'm. Glad that he is a sailor already because part of me thought this was like a guy who like was a hobbyist, which would make it much more impressive, but also much scarier. Yeah. Yeah. Quote, it's also going to get dark soon, he said, speaking via Starlink connection from his 42-foot sailboat in the Bering Sea. I got 24 hours of daylight now. How do you see the ice in the dark? What? Oh, I just got really excited because I know where the Bering Sea is. Oh, well, I'm happy for you.

You want to tell the rest of the class? I don't really know. It's like somewhere over by Alaska and stuff. You're like, I meant I had a concept of it. Yeah, I like kind of understand where it is. It's like up there and stuff like that. I get it. I light up some of it. I'm like, I know a thing. Yeah. Yeah, I totally get it. Rutherford's boat is armed with some helpful tools. Radar can spot the biggest chunks of ice. Thermal binoculars help him avoid smaller ones. And he has a little raft if things take a turn for the worst.

This doesn't sound so bad. Yeah, little raft. You got all these tools. Mm-hmm. Well, and he's got Starlink internet, so you can still watch your animes. Like, you wouldn't miss any of them. You might have to wait for them to download, but that's it. I mean, honestly.. Now you're like, this sounds so good. It really does sound good. But, like, I will die. Sure. But I also like it because I'm not around other people's, like, germs. So I'm not going to get, like, sick from things. I can, like, my... hypochondria can, can take a little bit of a backseat.

I mean, except for the fact that I think I'm going to die because I'm going to get frostbite. But that's not the same thing as hypochondria. Well, you have frostbite. I guess that could make fill your, your hypochondria. You can get hypochondriac about that. I would guess. Yeah. And I, I assume also I could be like, well, did I have enough vitamin C? Am I going to get scurvy? That's, it takes a while to get scurvy though. But I watched the terror and they got scurvy. Yeah. But they were there a while. And then the monsters came.

Yeah, that's pretty bitchin'. Yeah. No spoilers. But the clock is ticking. If he takes too long on his odyssey and summer turns to fall, the pack ice will freeze his boat in, dooming the expedition. Yep. You know that the Arctic waters are one of the reasons Russia just cannot be a powerhouse globally? Because if they had all of that sea that they're bordered on, if it was not often frozen... They could just have the most incredible shipping lanes. But since it is, they struggle. And that's why they have to buy leases all over the Middle East to get access to places.

That sucks. Yep. It's why America, economically, it was very easy for America to grow really fast, was we have really good shores for docks. Because you want jagged shores for docks because it breaks up the ocean tide. So if you have a smooth shore, then the ocean tide just goes right up to it. which is Africa, basically. Almost all of Africa is smooth, and it makes the tides just vicious when you're near the land. Damn. So that's one of the reasons that economically it's always been hard in Africa and always been easy in America once the ships started coming there.

Interesting. Yeah, I've watched a whole video on it. It made me really fascinated. Wow. Yet, for all this obvious danger, Rutherford is steadfast. His voyage, which began on June 25th on the western coast of Greenland, is partly driven by his love of exploration. It's also meant as a fundraiser for his climate science nonprofit, the Ocean Research Project. Of course it is. It's always about money with these people, with these nonprofit people. Normally, quote, normally I'm running a research schooner and we're studying glaciers in Greenland. And this year, because there's no funding, I'm doing a little side trip, he joked.

I wonder, I bet that I bet like the, his organization is like, man, we like Rutherford, but if he dies, it would be so good for us. Yeah. Everyone would hear about it. All the publicity. Yeah. Or if he discovers a pygmy raccoon, that would be really good. Arctic pygmy raccoon. I mean, that would, that would be something. Definitely. The federal government has slashed funding for climate science over the past two years. With this side trip, Rutherford hopes to attract new donors to his Arctic research group. The group's vessel needs a new engine, among other repairs.

Climate change in some ways has made Rutherford's solo voyage more attainable. Arctic sea ice has shrunk by about a third since the early 1980s, according to figures from the National Snow and Ice Data Center. The ice loss is not everywhere, he said. I mean, there's still going to be some really heavy ice I have to deal with down the road that could make or break this trip. Literally. Good luck, pal. Yay. Yep, good luck. So, Chell, what's the thing you would love to do alone that requires being alone? Um... Don't say dying. Oh.. Damn. I mean, that's a good one, though.

I don't know. Like, go stay in a haunted house alone. Or what about just walk up all the pedestrian staircases in Pittsburgh alone? Oh. Navigate those. Wow. That'd be a lot. Yeah. I'm going to do it. I believe in you. Thanks. I will put down $ 50 toward your Pittsburgh excursion. Thank you. And then you could do it to raise money for your stair organization. Yeah. We make stairs for people who have ranch homes, but they really want stairs. For exercise. Yeah. You can provide stairs for people who used to use ladders before they started doing trank and lost their arms.

And now they need stairs. Yeah, because they can't climb ladders. But they might have lost their legs. We can't help everybody, Michelle. Okay. Let's solve one problem, then move to the next one. Then the next one. Okay. Jeez. We're going to take a quick break. And when we come back, we're going to talk about our topic today, which is beavers and bat people. The great moon hoax of 1835. Right after this. Yeah. All right, Chell, let's find out what beavers and bat people have to do with the moon. I don't really think anything, but okay.

You don't want to take a guess? Oh, um, they're, they're from the moon. Oh, they, they just, they, they do really nice paintings of the moon. Oh, intricate ones. Look at you coming up with the facts. Uh, this article is from mental floss.com. And it's, uh, This one caught my attention very much and made me desperately want to know more. Because, you know, hoaxes are divisive, but they're interesting, right? You know, why people believe things. There's a show called World's Greatest Con, a podcast show that I love. And the rallying tagline of the show is, we don't fall for scams because we're stupid.

We fall for scams because we're humans. And I love that because, because usually people are good at scamming. People have a really good understanding of human nature. You know, they understand what people worry about, what people would be happy to have, what would make people at ease, you know, and that comes from understanding when life's hard. So, but the idea of a hoax from 1835 really kind of blows my mind. I want to know. Yeah. So on August 25th, eight, whoa, is that today? Oh, that's tomorrow for us. Well, for when we're recording. The show was airing on the 31st.

On August 25th, 1835, readers who stopped in front of the bellowing newsboys and produced a penny for a copy of the New York Sun newspaper received a lot to take in. Three quarters of the front page were devoted to what the newspaper claimed was... an excerpt from the credible sounding edinburgh journal of science they thought the scots had a science i'm gonna leave it that way i almost corrected my sentence no they thought the scots had a science that's yeah that's the right one In deepest South Africa, a renowned astronomer named John Herschel had made a discovery that was fantastic.

There was life on the moon. A lot of it. Plants. Beavers that stood on their hind legs. One-horned goats. And bat people. Wow. What I love about that is beavers that stood on their hind legs is not beaver people. Yes. Because I think bat people literally means people with bat wings, basically. I would think so. Fully humanoid, but with wings. So it can't be the beavers aren't beaver people because they're just beavers that stand like people. Yeah. But they're not people. Yeah. Okay. Don't beavers sometimes probably stand on their hind legs? They did in the cartoon The Angry Beavers.

They did? Yeah. Were you a fan? Yeah, I was. I love that show. I think everybody who watched Angry Beavers was like, man, I'm definitely the Norbert in my life, but we're all the Daggett. We're actually all the Daggett in our lives, but we want to believe we're the Norbert. Yeah. We're the Daggett. All right. Probably. Over the next five days, readers were transfixed by a breathless account of Herschel's peerless but not peer-reviewed examination of the moon's populated surface using a seven-ton telescope that he had recently constructed. Sweeping his gaze across the lunar environment, Herschel took note of colorful flowers, soul-enriching temples, and humanoids who could fly.

Oh, that's why they're bad people. Yeah. And I'm guessing because they didn't have feathers. Yeah. Because otherwise they'd be bird people. Bird person. Yeah. While it seemed too spectacular to be true, Herschel was a real scientist and a well-respected one. He had previously been quoted pondering life on the moon. He was also known to be in South Africa. Okay. The Edinburgh Journal of Science was legitimate too. Who was anyone to call him a liar? I mean, I would have if I was alive then. But I probably would have been too busy digging coal for like 18 hours a day.

Mm-hmm. You probably wouldn't even know about it. No. You know? No. Yeah. Yeah. Not a chance. Yeah. This, quote, stupendous discovery, as the paper dubbed it, was to be celebrated. And if discovering life on the moon wasn't enough, Herschel had also, quote, solved or corrected nearly every leading problem of mathematical astronomy. Wow. Whoa. He's like, he's amazing. And this is before we even knew germs existed. Yeah. This was back when people would be like, should I rinse my hands off before I stick them into your open body cavity? And everyone's like, why would you do that?

Yeah, come on, let's get moving. Yeah, don't waste the water. Come on. It's going to make it slippery. Yeah, it's going to make it worse. You don't know what would happen if water gets in there. Yeah. The reports captivated the city, spreading to other papers and inviting discussion over their plausibility. Who were these bipedal beavers and moon people? And had they found religion? Yeah. Well, they have temples. Yeah. Founded by editor Benjamin Day in 1833, The Sun was a pioneering newspaper in several ways. Utilizing a steam-powered printing press, it could rattle off tens of thousands of copies in a relatively short period of time, selling, for a penny, it was much cheaper than New York's six-cent alternatives.

Wow. Yeah. It was also the first paper in history to make use of newsboys. who would stand on busy streets barking headlines at passerby. At a bargain price, the Sun needed to maintain and bolster a circulation of 15,000 readers in order to attract advertisers. Wow. What they didn't necessarily need was accuracy. Unlike later papers of record and their staunch commitments to journalistic integrity, when was this written? What? Thank goodness that's not a problem anymore. The Sun and other news sources of that era weren't expected to tell the truth all of the time. Hmm. Items could be satirical or factual.

Readers might sometimes conflate the two. Before radio, newspapers were perceived as the catch-all entertainment of the day. While not quite as bombastic as the tabloids of the following century, some creative license was expected. that sounds like a great way to cope with the fact that you were just like lying for money. Yeah. I mean, I, that's what, that's what all fiction is, isn't it? Yeah, but not, but it's not, well, yes and no. I mean, you're not lying if you're saying it's, if you're, you're presenting it as fiction though. I mean, you're lying as in fiction is made up.

But, but maybe they would say like, well, we never said that the stuff in the paper is true. That fair point there. Yeah. Sounds like cope. That was, that was, that was what I was getting at was it sounds like cope. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I read a book called bad news by Satya Unger Sargon or Sargon Unger, Batya Unger Sargon. That's it. I read a book by her called bad news and it's about how newspapers changed and how the biggest change in news was when they started marketing to people who didn't have a lot of money.

And the sun was one of the first. that was like, we'll make our paper a penny so that it's like, I think it was like the, the judgment was like, it would be half the cost of lunch or something. Okay. Cause they were like, most people will spend half of what they spend on lunch on a newspaper if they believe they're getting value from it. Cause, and you didn't have to have a subscription cause people were barking it everywhere. Cause that was the other thing was people were like, you'd have to pay six cents a day, but you'd have to pay that every week.

So they made their subscription price about as low as it could get. But it's interesting how that like, both bolstered and destroyed journalism at the same time. So, yeah, it's an interesting conundrum. The media. It was under this hazy climate that the paper began to run a startling account of astronomer John Herschel's work. His father, William, had discovered Uranus in 1781. On August 21st, The Sun printed what was essentially a teaser, promising readers a glimpse of, quote, astronomical discoveries of the most wonderful description. Four days later, the first six parts appeared, most of it devoted to a detailed explanation of how Herschel had been able to bear witness to such marvels.

Well, we're going to take a break and dig even deeper because I am really excited to find out where this is going. Right after this. All right. Let's find out about these bat people. All right. I need to know. Owing to a quote hydro oxygen microscope. That almost sounds real. After what we were hearing about other microscopes as a element added, uh, to a gigantic telescope lens, Herschel was able to illuminate a view from great distances. The 24 foot optical device was forged by expert glassmakers with the power of 42,000 X magnification. The report explained he had hoped to observe possible insect life on the moon from his work base, 35 miles from Cape town, Africa.

That, that is cocky. I want to look at the insects on the moon with my super scope. That's another interesting thing about world history, by the way. People who found the most pure silica to make the best glass ended up winning wars and stuff. Glasses became incredibly important by the 1900s for everything. And if you think about it, it's like if you had the best silica, you had the best glasses, the best telescopes, the best binoculars, everything. Yeah, I guess that's true. And America has the highest quality silica in the world in North Carolina. I don't know.

Wow. Yeah. Anyway, as the series unfolded, it was clear he had far exceeded those expectations. Astonished readers discovered on day two of the series that after training his telescope on the moon, Herschel had caught sight of a dark red flower sprouting from basaltic rock. I don't know that word. Basaltic? It might be basaltic. Yeah, maybe. As well as water and trees. Animals similar to bison roamed the grounds. A bluish single-horned goat trotted in full view of the scope. On day three, Andrew Grant, the purported author of the articles and a declared associate of Herschel's, described their most wonderful or wondrous finding yet.

Quote, a biped beaver. The last resembles the beaver of the earth in every other relationship. than in its destitution of a tail and its invariable habit of walking upon only two feet. It carries its young in its arms like a human being and moves with an easy gliding motion. Wow. Yeah. What do you say to that? I guess that's fine. I'm glad you think so. You may. I laughed at it. Put a tiny bit of my ginger tea into my sinuses, which feels awesome. We broke me for a second. No, the next line is also the worst thing on the show after doing it for a few years.

Is when I'm laughing about something, like sincerely just losing it for a second. And then I go back and the first sentence is either absurd or just comes across as absurd out of context. Then I can't stop laughing at all. Yeah. Here's why I broke just now, Chell. These sophisticated beavers, Grant reported. That's what killed me. had built huts more impressive, quote, than those of many tribes of human savages. Finally! We got some racism in there, finally! How long was it gonna take? Jeez, dude. I mean, at least he called them human. I guess that's a step in the right direction.

I wonder if he'll start describing, like, a slave colony on the moon. Like, with smoke emanating from their tops, they had apparently mastered the concept of fire. Toasty beaver homes would be hard to top, but Grant had more up his sleeve. On day four, readers learned the men had witnessed, quote, large winged creatures that were, quote, certainly like human beings and, quote, engaged in conversation. The discovery predated the Weekly World News' reveal of Batboy by well over a century. That's a pretty... I was going to make that joke, but they put it in there. Yeah.

Day five brought a description of a temple-like construct that may have indicated these creatures were prone to worship an unknown religion. Making too many assumptions. We don't know anything about these things. That could be like their grocery store. Oh, I was going to say they're probably just Greek Orthodox. Oh, okay. That's my guess. But no, it could be a grocery store. It could be a movieplex. Yeah, could be anything. Yeah, could be a Nickelodeon. Those were a thing back then, I guess, on the moon as well as on Earth. Yeah. Day six brought mention of a larger variety of the bat people who ate fruit in a rather uncouth manner.

Fuck you, dude. Well, that just means they eat fruit like bats eat fruit. Because, you know, they're funny how they eat. I guess. You ever watch a bat eat? The ones that eat fruit and bugs? Yeah. Yeah, they do, like, scarf. Okay, but you don't think that bat people would just eat fruit like normal people? I mean, not unless they've been influenced by normal people, because otherwise that's how it's normal to them. Now who's the colonizer? Now! Okay, jeez. The funny thing is that is literally what I was getting at, though. I was like, no, because they're separate.

To them, they're just like, this is what you do. And remember, in bat people culture, the way you show a meal was really good is you don't belch. That's very rude. You hork the food down as fast as you can, and then you lick your hands entirely clean and show them that they're spotless. Yeah. And that's how they know you loved the meal. Yeah. Then you take a pee on the floor. Okay, so... The final entry in the series also offered an unfortunate postscript of sorts. Oh, boy. According to Grant, Herschel's daily examination of the moon ended abruptly when his telescope had been left in an unfavorable position, absorbing the sun's rays and sending his observatory into flames.

Oh, no, and he doesn't have the money to make a new one. Unless we send it to him. Oh, gee. This goes from hoax to scam so fast. The high-powered device had been damaged and needed to be repaired. The story of life on the moon quickly spread not only to other New York publications, but into other eastern states and then Europe. The New Yorker apparently professed its support for the account. Baptist missionaries reportedly contemplated whether the bat people might need donations or the teachings of the gospel. The scientific community didn't immediately declare the sun's reporting fraudulent.

After all, they had so little information about the moon, no one could unequivocally state that there wasn't life there. I guess it's hard to imagine living a hundred more than a hundred years pre moon landing, let alone how insane technology jumps started once the 1800s hit. Um, it's really like insane to think like you could grow up before there were trains. And by the time you're 55, watch people land on the moon. They are maybe not that quite that intense, but what I meant was you could grow up before like, uh, the railroads done on in America.

I mean, like, we don't even have all the railroad track laid. And then 50 years later, it's like, we're on the moon. You're like, what? Like, yeah, crazy how quickly things advanced. Yeah. So that is something I try to keep in mind, but yeah. So like being that far away from it, it's like, why wouldn't you think there's life on the moon? It's just right there. There could be, we can't get over there. Yeah. We tried Tom over there, tried jumping to it and he can jump high. Yeah. And, but it didn't work. And he broke his toe.

Oh, we had to put them down. It's the only thing we know. Well, we put leeches on him first. James Gordon Bennett was another story. As the editor of the New York Herald, a competing paper, Bennett took to his pages on August 31st. Hey, that's today when this is airing. Immediately after the serial had wrapped and accused the son of perpetuating a hoax upon the public. While the Edinburgh Journal of Science was a real publication, Bennett wrote... It had merged with another two years prior and effectively did not exist. He pointed his finger specifically at Richard Adams Locke, who had recently arrived at the Sun as editor and had met Bennett briefly during a criminal trial and expressed an interest in astronomy.

Locke had also enjoyed success selling his collected newspaper work in pamphlet form, exactly what the sun had done with the moon story, moving 60,000 copies in one month. Locke denied it. The two sparred back and forth in their respective papers, even after mail arriving from Europe in September confirmed the hoax as fiction. Locke refused to budge. This is like when we were kids, Rupert Murdoch fighting with Ted Turner. Just, yo, you're a friggin' idiot. Rupert Murdoch's like, he's a pretty foolish man. And then Ted Turner going, you want to have a fist fight? God, those were the days.

Finally, after leaving the sun in 1836, Locke began to use quote author of the moon hoax as part of his byline. This, if there's ever a reason to understand why America is the land of opportunity and milk and honey, it's this story. It tells you exactly why I would, if I were living in a, a dirt floor you know building struggling to survive and i read that story i'd be like i gotta go there where the guy just adds it to his byline and now he's like still out there i'd be like no i can get by on anything i don't even have to be perfect to do well there you know i just have to be clever yeah yeah in 1840 he went into more detail saying he intended the piece to be satire and a commentary on theologians and Christian pundits like Thomas Dick, a science writer who trumpeted the idea of life on other planets without any scientific basis for doing so.

Ooh, okay. I've heard about Thomas Dick. He lived up to his name. Very ridiculous claims. Surprisingly, readers held no grudge against the sun. Once the hoax was revealed, most of it, most found it to be fun and a clever method of raising awareness and circulation of the newspaper, which boasted 30,000 readers two years later. I mean, it's quite possible that everybody reading it was like, come on, that's not real. Most people were probably like, I don't know about that. Yeah, I don't know if I really trust the sun about things. That was pretty ridiculous. But that also makes a good point, though, that a lot of people thought it was just a clever method of raising awareness, if the rest of the sun was interesting and valuable, then people back then, I mean, a penny was not nothing.

You'd read the whole paper. So they may have just been like, ha, well, the paper's good. I mean, that was pretty silly. And then they just move on. Like I, that my penny is well spent the end, you know, now if they did it every week, I'm sure it would be very different, but the, Oh, Ooh, the only curmudgeon seems to have been Edgar Allen Poe. the writer and the writer had written a similarly absurd oh i know i know poe pretty well i mean like his stories it totally sounds like something poe wrote yeah and i didn't even think about that's the same time period yeah the writer had written a similarly absurd story about a manned balloon flight to the moon in the southern literary literary messenger two months prior that received relatively little attention at the time he accused lock of stealing his idea lock who died in 1871 never acknowledged poe as an influence.

It's possible. It just, you know. It could be spontaneous creation for sure. Yeah. The Sun remained in business until 1916, dealing mostly in human interest stories and local New York news. After a series of mergers, it continued publishing under various names until the 1960s. Although there's no evidence they reported any further pieces on the moon's inhabitants, they never printed a retraction either. So in over 100 years, they never printed a retraction. That's so good. Wow. So what did you learn, Michelle? Because this was a good one. I really enjoyed learning about this. Yeah, me too.

I learned that people aren't really that gullible, probably, because nobody was upset when they were like, oh, it's not real. Yeah, that's fair. And that's really what I learned, actually. Yeah. I'll tell you. Something, something New York. Something, something New York. Something, something DeBronx. Did you ever watch that vampire movie? It was like Vampires vs. the Bronx or whatever? No, I haven't watched it. Oh. We're going to take a quick break, and when we come back, I'll tell you what I learned, and then we'll talk about the horror film I saw in the theater, as well as one of the most unbelievable and intense Reddit stories you ever heard, courtesy of Michelle, right after this.

All right, we're back. See, I made it so far and now I can't talk. We're back wrapping up our August 2026 edition of Monthly Spooky. For those of you just tuning in, which doesn't make any sense because that's not how this works. I will be turning 40 in like two weeks. I'll have my Amazon gift thing in the show notes if you want to spoil me a little bit, you know, treat me like a little baby, even though I'm an old man. And I'm getting a new car. which is very exciting because it's my first new car and my third car overall.

I've had good luck with cars, you know? So, I mean, how many cars have you had? Four. That's pretty good. I think four cars isn't that many. Was your first car kind of a beater? No, but I crashed into something. Oh, you shouldn't do that. No. Just for the future reference. And then a transmission one. So I don't actually know if that was related or not. Yikes. Ooh, well, geez, chill. Um, but, uh, yeah, that, that, that moon story though, really was fascinating to me. I love, I love that. Oh, it made me think of something.

And I, cause you touched on the idea, like maybe people weren't just, weren't so gullible. They just took it as it was intended or whatever, as we understand now, there is a whole debate about, In Romanian, like in the circles of like Romanian archaeology and history, because they found proof and evidence of like papers and pamphlets being circulated in the late 1800s and stuff, warning people about vampires, telling them like a grave has been found empty or whatever. Like we need to be ready for vampires, like have garlic, do this, do this, do this. And some people have come out and been like, based on the historical record, we think this was a goof.

Like that this was fun. People would be like, oh man, the vampire's out. That means we all need to hang out together and have a party and make food and drink wine. And when I heard that, I was like, man, that sounds a lot more like the humans I know than just wantonly believing in vampires based on a frigging, you know, flyer. Yeah. Yeah. You know? Yeah. I feel like if there were vampires loose, maybe they'd say it at the church, you know, at service, which most people would be at because it's like 1810. you know, but maybe I'm crazy, but I don't know, but no, I just, that reminded me of that though, that like, Oh, they took it in a totally different way.

Cause it's very hard to understand context when it's that separated. Yeah. Yeah. But in my experience, usually when I don't understand context is because I assume it's going to be so much more different than my own. And, and it usually humans always, uh, they never disappoint in being very similar. Yeah. Yeah. So, but with that all being said, before we get out of here, I, I did see one horror film in the theater. I would have seen a second one, but it came out before the show, which was the new Insidious movie. But I saw The End of Oak Street, which is the dinosaur horror adventure movie thing.

Yeah. I have to say that I feel like the killer dinosaur genre has not been properly exploited over the last few years or decades. We used to have killer dinosaur movies. Not a ton of them. But you had Carnosaur, you had Carnosaur 2, Carnosaur 3, Carnosaur, well, it wasn't 4, Raptor, which was basically Carnosaur 4. Maybe it was just the Carnosaur movies. I just want more Carnosaur movies. Okay. Is the reality of my life right now. But yeah, there were all these, like, I like it because dinosaurs would be dangerous and could kill you. I mean, Jurassic Park, you know, the dinosaurs are killing people.

So I was stoked for it and I did like it. That sounded like I was about to say why it disappointed me. Not quite. But, you know, I fake out. I'm good at fake outs. But I did like it. The movie theater trailers, you mentioned the commercials didn't seem to make it seem like a horror movie. No. But the trailers I saw in the theater made it seem like a horror film. Yeah. And while it has a lot of horror elements, it was much more like kind of a thriller family adventure to me. Which is kind of what I got.

Oh, wow. Yeah. And I thought it worked. I mean, I got Family Adventure and then Dinosaurs. Oh, yeah. You're like, I missed the dinosaur part. There are dinosaurs there? Yeah, I was like, what's happening here? They're just this family and they're. I don't know. Ewan McGregor is like yelling a lot. Something like that. But I did really enjoy it. I think that they should have just, because it wasn't a lot of like bloody violence in it. I think they should just cut it all out and made it a PG movie. I think then way more people would have went and seen it.

Because it was not scarier than Jurassic Park. Like in my opinion, but it was super fun. It felt kind of like a, almost like an amazing stories or a twilight zone episode. The ending was super satisfying and nice. Okay. I think it's worth watching, especially if you want to take like a kid that, you know, is a little like maybe 10 or 11 would probably be fine with it. I really liked it. And it had a good message at the end too. Yeah. Dinosaurs are bad. Damn right. Yeah. Damn right. So but I enjoyed it.

So unfortunately, that was the only horror film that was in the theater that month, that last month. So Chell hit us with the most terrifying Reddit story ever known to all of mankind. Damn. So the glitch in the Matrix Reddit subreddit is like not very active right now. You think that's a glitch in the Matrix itself? I wish that that's what it was. I think people just don't care as much, or maybe it's like not the right time of the year. Like it's like people are posting. Yeah. Yeah. They're, they're out there touching their, their grass.

Um, but I, there is one that I thought was kind of interesting and probably not real, but you know, so, so there's this, it's 1988 and there's this, I guess, I guess there, I don't know what their genders are, but there's these two people. And they are in their first year of college in, I don't remember where, at the dorms. And it's like near, it's getting close to Halloween. And they heard that in this one dorm where one of them lives, there is going to be a haunted house. And they're like, let's see if we can find it.

And like, because they're probably because they're setting up for it and shit. And it's supposed to be in the attic. So let's like see if we can go find it. Yeah. So they go up. Yeah. They go up to the attic. They go up as far as they can, at least. to where they think the attic is. And it's just, there's like a door, but it's like locked. And they're like, okay. So they go down one floor and they're like, we're just exploring the dorm. And it's like a really, really quiet floor. And it has like, you know, probably dorm rooms and stuff.

And then there's like an emergency, like stairwell exit. And then there was another one, but they looked down that one. It's not really emergency stairwell. It's just more dorms, rooms. And then they see like, I don't know if it's like a door near a bathroom or a bathroom door or something. And they're like, let's open it. They can't open it. But then they're like, okay, like, okay, there's nothing good on this floor. So they're going to leave. But then the one girl is just, I guess they're women now. The one girl is just standing and the doorknob turns and it opens.

Oh. And inside is this like really, really big, long room. Like they said, like maybe it's a hundred feet down and it's like real wide and it has these like really big windows. And there's like all this weird medical stuff, like some gurneys and and like EKGs or heart thing. I don't know what's there. There's medically things. There's stuff, yeah. Yeah, there's stuff. And they're like, huh. And they're like, I guess this is what they're doing for the haunted house. You know, like, I guess they're like, it's going to be like some sort of weird like hospital, something creepy like that.

So they like go around and then they leave and they see another friend who I guess is doing the haunted house or something. And they're like, hey, we ran into the haunted house. and it's over here and the friend was like what and they were like but it's this room and it's like and they look up at the dorms and realize there's absolutely no way those windows could have been in the dorm like there's no big giant windows at all and where they thought it was doesn't exist like there's no way to go over there So they're just like, what?

What? And they also both are artists. So they both independently drew what they thought it looked like. And it was similar. Okay. So then they're just like, I don't know, man. They like looked around. They went back up to that floor. Can't find it. Don't understand what happened. A couple of years later, they're like still really interested in what it is. And they're like, we're going to go to the library and we're going to find the plans for the building. And we're going to see what this was. And they go to the library and the library is like, you have to go to our like archives extension.

So they go over the archives extension. They tell this woman like what they're looking for. And she's like, and they're like afraid she's going to be like weirded out. And she's like, oh, let me go get this stuff. Let me find the plants. Goes to the back. They hear a very loud conversation. And then that woman and another woman come out and they're like, and she says, let me see. what she says. Cause it was like really, I got it. You've actually got me. Okay, good. She says the information you're looking for, it's not here and you will never see it.

What does that mean? I don't know, except that it would make me want to find it harder than ever. Yeah. So they were like, okay. And they leave. And then they're thinking about some more and they go back to the, the main library and, And the library has no idea what they're talking about, about this, this archive extension. So they just don't know what happens. Oh my God. Okay. Yeah. So first of all, I mean, that one, you pulled me in really well. That one was really engrossing. Good. It has hallmarks of creepy pasta. And I don't mean that to be negative.

I love a good creepy pasta. I just mean like them both being artists and drawing the things and And then that ending, especially, I mean, because if somebody told you, like, and you'll never find it, would just, who would say that? Yeah, because you. Would think someone would be like, you guys have been in here before. Like, there's, you know, just something like, there's nothing like that. Stop it. Yeah. You know, if you were going to be annoyed at the person, not like you're never going to find it because we've hidden it so well. I mean, if you say you're, and you're never going to, that's like a challenge.

That's not, I mean, like in human nature, that's going to be people think like, we'll see about that. Like that'd be the first reaction I'd have. If somebody said, you're never going to find that you're, you're never going to find, or you're not going to find it. And you never will. I'd be like, we'll see pal. Yeah. I'm going to be back tomorrow and I'm not going to have any clothes on. That would be my, my move. I mean, that would help you find it. But did anybody have any, like, theories or rundowns to it or cause that's, that one's pretty solid.

I like that one a lot. Thanks. Um, no, actually there's basically no comments. Oh, it was 14 hours ago. Yeah. There's like five comments. So no, someone was like freaky and someone else said, do you got a TLDR before I commit to that novel? Cause it's really long. Um, So the internet is doing its thing. Yeah. You should post one where you describe, uh, realizing there are bat people and, upright walking beavers on the moon. Yeah. I wonder, I should feed that into chat GBT, that whole like article and then be like, rewrite this as a Reddit post.

I bet it would be awesome. Actually. Actually, that'd be, that would, I would be okay with that. That'd be pretty cool. I might, I might see if I could do that. If I can, I'll, I'll send it to you, Chell. Okay. So, but, well, I guess that is, that's it for this month. So, thank you all for joining us here on Monthly Spooky. We had a great time talking about spooky news, learning something spooky, and just generally going on tangents. That's mostly on my part. And Chell enjoyed getting angry. Hey, people love mad Chell. I'm not actually mad.

Right, right. No, it's just the way I sound. Because, Because that's because of my.. The Bronx? Yeah. Because of where I'm from. I'm not actually mad, though. Okay. It's like when somebody commented on one of my YouTube reels and said, hey, the sound is on. No need to sign. Because I guess I was using my hands a lot. Oh. I commented and said, look, dude, I'm Portuguese. I can't help it. You're just lucky I didn't scream the whole video. Yeah. Yeah, we loud. We loud people. Ah! Anyway. But it's okay, Chell. You're allowed to be angry sometimes.

I'm not angry. People love it when Chell's, like, mean and crunchy. That's, like, their favorite time of the show. So. But thank you guys for joining us. We will, of course, be back next month at the end of the month to run down some more fun stuff and get ready for the Halloween season. Because it'll be coming right up. So if you want to email us, send us an email at weeklyspooky at gmail.com, especially if you want to let Michelle know she was being mean or angry. We would love to hear from you there. And if you love what we're doing here and want to show us some support, leave us a five-star rating on Apple Podcasts or Spotify.

It makes a pretty big difference and it doesn't cost you a red cent. So until next time, Chell has the last angry word. I'm not angry. Thank you.