WEBVTT
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Snow hammers the old Ohio farmhouse. The milk and cookies
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sit waiting by the fire, and a little brown terrier
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has just licked the plate clean. Outside, the wind changes,
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hooves rattle on the roof, far too light for reindeer
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and too loud for anything human. As the fire dies,
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maybe you will too. How did you get in here?
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Ho?
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Ho?
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What's that you want to be scared to? Come with me?
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This is Weekly Spooky. Hello, my spookies, It's Wednesday, and
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you know what that means. It's time for a little
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spooky in your weekly. But of course it is the
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most wonderful time of the year, so we'll be back
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here tomorrow with another episode and a special novella length
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one at that There's always something to unwrap here at
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Weekly Spooky every day until Christmas, and on Friday we
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have a special episode of Cutting Deep into Horror where
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Rachel and I discussed the two thousand and seven holiday
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horror thriller and one of my personal favorites, wind Chill.
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So make sure you're subscribed, and if you love what
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we're doing here, head to Weeklyspooky dot com, slash join
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and sign up for our Patreon for as little as
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one dollar a month and get two bonus episodes every month,
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as well as over five years of exclusive Creepypasta readings
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and audiobooks. That's Weeklyspooky dot com slash Join your support
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makes all the difference. But now, as for tonight, Imagine
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it's Christmas Eve on a lonely farm way out where
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the fields turn into white, empty dark. The house is warm,
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the tree is glowing, and there's a plate of cookies
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and milk waiting by the fireplace. Because that's one tradition,
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you never skip, not here, not in this family. But
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what if you did? What if a naughty little dog
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knocked over the tray and the milk and cookies meant
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for Santa Claus disappeared before midnight? What if every story
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you heard about Crampus, the shadow of Saint Nicholas, the
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thing that comes for unbelievers, wasn't just an old wives
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tale but a true and honest warning. Tonight we're lighting
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a Christmas fire and asking what really comes down the
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chimney when you forget to be good for goodness sake?
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And is there any hope of escape when the shadow
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of Santa Claus is coming to your town? Milk Cookies
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and Crampus by Rob Fields. Hello everybody. Bill Bayer back
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here with you again, at least I'm pretty sure we've
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met before. How about I tell you one more memoir
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centered around Christmas. For the record, I wasn't there when
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this one took place. I'm only recounting it from when
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Daisy May Donnery and Carnelian Miron told their story to
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the rest of us on Christmas Day. For the sake
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of being able to share this memoir with all of you,
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I'll try not to take too many liberties in the
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name of storytelling. This takes place after our little run
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in with Isley Tinker and his Christmas Carnival. Not to
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mention meeting the Dark Mother herself. Some people seem to
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know her as Hell Weaver. Since you're here to experience
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this story now, then you know we all made it out.
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The Dark Mother herself saved Christmas for a thousand souls,
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including those of our group. On account of a technicality
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regarding an arrangement she and Tinker had made, our group
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would end up repeating Christmas Eve. As a result, we
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went to the Christmas Bazaar in Gunter Square Park the
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same as we did the first day, it was Daisy May, Donnerly, Carnelian, Mirn,
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Jasper Jinks, Truck Tucker, and me. Unlike our first go around,
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we wouldn't see that flyer about the Christmas Carnival and
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end up going to and being trapped in it. Catastrophe averted.
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We finished our day at Daisy May's farm, where her
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mom and dad shared cookies and spiced hot shod chocolate
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with us. After a while the rest of us left,
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leaving Daisy May and Carnelian. It's from there that I'll
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tell you the story the way I recall it being
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told to me. But first we'll have to introduce another
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character into the story, in that of Daisy May's little
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brown terrier named Old mc donald. For the record, he
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really wasn't a bad dog. He was always friendly to
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anyone who met him. From what I'd seen, he had
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the same fire and gusto as Daisy May herself. And
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you know Rose, her mother was the one who instilled
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her own fire into her little girl, so it was
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likely she did the same to Old mc donald. For
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a little dog, he sure had the appetite of a
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dog at least three times his size. It seemed like
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he had a bottomless pit, especially where people food was concerned.
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The family kept Old McDonald's diet under control. Once in
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a while he would get a reward of said people food.
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That little dog was so happy he devoured what he
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was given earlier on when the rest of us were there.
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Old McDonald would come and hang out with me, Always
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with me. I didn't know if he thought hanging around
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me might score him some table scraps. He sure had
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a hanker in for the Christmas cookies Rose made. I
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don't know how she makes her food so unbelievably delicious.
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I think maybe Rose's culinary skills were the reason why
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Carnelian liked being on the farm so much. At least
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they couldn't hurt anyway. Old McDonald was trying to get
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some of those cookies. He'd bark out of desperation when
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no one would give him any. Rose would then chase
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him off, but he'd always sneak back. Old McDonald came
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into the kitchen where Daisy May and Carnelian were doing
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the dishes together. Daisy May was washing and Carnelian was
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drying and putting them on the counter. Rose said she
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would put them away when they were finished. Oh, I
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see you there, Old McDonald, Rose said in her Southern
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accent as she picked him up. The dog growled at
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being held by the matriarch of the Donnerly farm. He
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would never have bitten her, though he was merely being playful.
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Rose cradled him in her arms and started scratching his belly.
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Old McDonald loved all the attention Rose gave him, even
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though he was supposed to be Daisy May's dog. Daisy
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May herself would tell you he was much more Rose's
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pup than hers. Straight Daisy May's dad came in and
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gave the dog some petting before he talked to his wife.
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After a time, she sent him to the living room.
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Then she went to Daisy May and Carnelian. Done finished
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the dishes, did you? She asked the girls. We sure did.
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Carnelian assured her, I just finished drying the last one.
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Daisy May raised her finger as she stood on the
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stool in front of the dual sinks. Hold it, Carney
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missed one. Found it while drain in the washwater, She
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squeaked in her southern mousey voice. She pulled a fork
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out of the sink and cleaned it up. Carnelian took
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the fork and dried it off. Okay, now we're done,
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Rose chuckled, Carneie Mirron, you definitely belong here on the farm.
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As much work as you do here, you sure put
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in your time this mornin'. She loves your home cookin'.
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Ma Daisy May cracked. Carnelian blushed a little. She looked
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ready to snap at Daisy May. Instead, she just sighed
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and told Rose she's not wrong. Rose ruffled her hair
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a little. You're learning and earning your keep here. I
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know you're living here on your folks dime, but but
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you definitely earn your plates at the table. Rose liked
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having Carnelian around and was glad to see how much
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she and Daisy May had bonded as friends since that
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Halloween night. We done here, Ma, Daisy May said, coming
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down off the stool. Yeah, you kids can go on
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up to the barn. Rose answered, oh wait, now hold up,
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Daisy May and Carnelian stopped and turned back to Rose. Yama,
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Daisy May chirped. Rose quickly picked up one of the
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clean plates. She moved over to where the rest of
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the Christmas. Cookies we had enjoyed earlier were put away.
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She placed some cookies on the plate and set it down.
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Then she got a glass and poured some creamy buttermilk
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into it from the refrigerator. She put it down next
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to the cookies. You girls, take these into the living
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room and put them by the fireplace. Rose instructed, Daisy,
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may you get the little table set up. Why are
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we doing this, Carnelian asked.
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Daisy.
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May answered for her mom. Because we gotta leave milk
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and cookies out for the big guy tonight, you know, Christmas,
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even everything. Carnelian gave them a weird look. You're serious,
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Rose was quick to point at Carnelian. One thing you're
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gonna learn around here, Carne, is there's traditions you just
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never break in our family. The biggest one is you
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always leave milk and cookies for Santa Claus. Carnelian composed herself, Okay,
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i'll bite what happens if you don't leave milk and
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cookies out for her father Christmas? You get coal in
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your stocking or something. Rose glared at Carnelian, I'm gonna
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excuse your starkiness on account of it being your first
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Christmas here as part of this family. She pointed sharply
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at her. If you don't leave milk and cookies out
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for Santa Claus on Christmas Eve tonight, then you're asking
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for all kinds of bad things to happen. And if
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you get coal in your stocking, you'd be darn lucky.
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I mean it now, don't you dare be tempting fate.
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Carnelian turned to look at Daisy May, and she could
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tell she wasn't quite believing Rose herself. Just the same,
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the girls obeyed Rose and took the plate and glass
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into the living room. Daisy May set up the little
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table near the fireplace straight came and knelt down in
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front of the fire, putting another log into it. Looks
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like Ma's got you girls taking care of Sanna. Huh.
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Carnelian looked at him. Do you believe in Santa? For
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that matter? Do you believe in doing this? Always? The
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laid back and patient man that he was, he stood up.
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You've been here long enough to know how headstrong my
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better half can be.
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Carney.
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If there's one thing my paw said to me back
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when he met her, it was that she knows things.
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She's got traditions and customs passed down to her by
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her own family. I definitely learned the hard way that
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you listen when your better half tells you about traditions,
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especially when you're both born and raised in Strickfield, Ohio. Here,
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Carnelian wouldn't back down. But why leave milk and cookies
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here for Santa? Come on, straight, I'm old enough to
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know there's no such thing as Santa. Claus straight smirked
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and shook his head slowly. Yeah, you and Daisy May
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are both two of a kind. You are, he sighed. Normally,
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you ain't supposed to be up and waiting for Santa
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to come. But I got a mind to just let
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you girls stay right in here tonight and see for yourselves.
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He pointed at both of them. You girls best mind
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your maul when she tells you to do something, especially
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where old wives tales are concerned. He pointed to the kitchen. Now,
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MA ain't kidding none about them milk and cookies. No, sir,
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you don't leave them out for Santa. You're gonna be
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asking for a whole heap of trouble. Carnelian was riled up. Now,
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but what kind of trouble? Come on? Will you level
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with us here? Straight got real serious. Well, i'd done
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herd from Jerome Fisher back when we lived in Pendleton
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that his family actually had a meeting with the bad
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version of Santa himself. Are you trying to say that
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old Coot met up with Crampis for not leaving milk
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and cookies for Sanna? Daisy May asked, in disbelief. Straight shrugged.
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I ain't saying whether he did or not. I wasn't there,
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mind you. I also heard about Crampis from George Belcher
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and his better half. Turns out their boys didn't believe
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and didn't bother leaving milk and cookies out for Sanna.
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Crampis darn near made off with them, two rascals. He
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pointed to the kitchen. I heard Mau telling you in
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there about tempting fate. You just don't do it, plain
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and simple. Daisy May and Carnelian both looked at each other,
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still not believing what the elders had done. Hold them still,
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they set up the milk and cookies as they were
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told to do. What none of them had seen. However,
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was old McDonald looking in I think in his little
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doggy mind he was hatching a plan on how to
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get those cookies. Then Carnelian clapped her hands together. You
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know what, Straight, I think I would like to sit
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down here tonight and see if Santa does come for
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the milk and cookies. Straight, nod at once. You go
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right on ahead, Carney. I think the log I put
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on the fire will be done by the time him
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and those eight tiny reindeer come parking up on our roof.
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You staying here at the house with carneye? Daisy May? Sure, Paul,
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why not? Daisy May, replied Carnelie and pointed at her.
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Darned straight, you are. I want to have a witness
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to back me up when we don't see anything. She
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looked at Straight, except for the milk and cookies still
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being here in the morning. Straight chuckled. You still got
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a lot to learn, Carney. Anyway, you girls have at it.
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It's getting late, so I'm gonna turn in for a
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long winter's nap. Good night, girls. Straight moved to the
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stairway and slowly ascended it. About twenty minutes later, Rose
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came and said good night to the girls. Then she
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pointed sharply at both of them. I better not find
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out you two ate them cookies and drank up the milk.
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Folks around here'll be wondering what became of both of you.
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When she saw Carnelian's doubtful look, she especially pointed at her,
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you just not believe in what I say. You'll learn
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soon enough. You just wait and see if you don't.
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From there, Rose made her way upstairs. Daisy May and
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Carnelian were alone in the living room. It's eleven o'clock.
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Carnelian observed, what should we do to kill time while