WEBVTT
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For tonight's Halloween outing in our imagination. Why don't you
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take the seat at the back of the hay wagon?
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You can still see the farm stand. Somebody is carrying
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a paper bag of donuts toward the parking lot. There
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are pumpkins beside the door, and you're feeling very pleased
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with October. Then the tractor turns and The lights slip
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behind the trees. Straw shifts underneath you. Beyond the wagon,
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the corn stands high enough to hide a person. Something
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rattles through it, keeping pace. You look at your friend.
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Your friend has become intensely interested in the other side
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of the wagon. Up ahead, a path opens between the stalks,
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and now comes the part that wasn't in your cozy
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little fall picture. It's time to get off the ride.
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This is Thursday Thrills, a quick weekly ride into the
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creepy stories, haunted places, weird obsessions, and eerie little corners
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of the world worth talking about. I'm Enrique Couto, and
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tonight we're heading into haunted corn mazes, taking the hayride
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after dark, and celebrating Halloween's wonderful ability to make a
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perfectly nice farm look like a terrible place to lose
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your friends. How does the place that sold you a
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pumpkin this afternoon... become somewhere you're afraid to walk this evening. Well, first,
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let's enjoy the afternoon. That cool air and the autumn
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beige of the corn put me straight into a Halloween mood.
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Thanksgiving will have to wait. I need to get all
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the spooky out of my system first. Give me a
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farm stand with cider, a pumpkin that's Slightly too big
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to carry comfortably, and something baked that I fully intended
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to share, but, well, stuff happens. This is an excellent
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use of an October weekend. There's time to wander. You
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can admire the decorations, debate which pumpkin has the best
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face hiding inside it, and put off admitting that you've
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parked farther away than you... Remember, at Schaefer Farms in Flemington,
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New Jersey, that cheerful side of the season is very real.
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Its fall offerings include hay rides to the pumpkin fields,
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farm animals, and mazes. The farm stand advertises local apple
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cider and fresh-baked pies. Then the same farm's website has
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a second heading, By Night. Under that heading is Farm
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of Horrors. I appreciate a business that can address both
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sides of my very own personality. A pumpkin for the
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porch and a reason to check underneath said porch before
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I dare climb the steps. The daylight visit gives us
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something important for our little adventure. We've seen the place
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when it's friendly. We know there are people working there
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and cars parked nearby. We know the world hasn't come
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to an end. But return to our imaginary wagon after
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that last turn and try finding any of those things
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to be at all reassuring. You've got a row of
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shoulders in front of you. The back of somebody's jacket.
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A little patch of ground moving underneath the wheels. The
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tractor is still making a perfectly ordinary noise for a tractor.
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You may discover you've become quite attached to it, by
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the way. Here's the real detail that gives our opening
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its teeth, or more so, fangs. Farm of Horrors describes
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a connected route, the Hayride of Horror, then a drop-off
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that sends visitors onto the, well, aptly named Trail of Terror.
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There's another short wagon ride right before the Massacre Maze.
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That's spelled like massacre, but with acre emphasized, and maze
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is spelled M-A-I-Z-E. You know, like the native word for corn,
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or so I've been told. With the carnival, another great pun,
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of chaos still to come. The ride is not the
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whole adventure. It delivers you into one. Its published 2026
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season runs on selected October nights through Halloween. That's how
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Farm of Horrors describes the route... And that handoff is
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truly spectacular. On a wagon, somebody else handles the route.
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You sit there, point out the suspicious thing near the fence,
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and hope it's more interested in the people at the
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front of the wagon. Once you're walking, the next step, well,
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that belongs all to you. Let's stay with that change
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for just a moment. In our imagined version, the wagon
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has delivered us to the path. The group starts moving,
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and behind us the engine sounds farther and farther away.
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There goes the thing that knew where it was headed.
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Now you're following a friend whose navigational qualifications are that they...
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happen to stand up first. I usually end up leading
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the group, even though I'm the one getting the most scared.
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I'm easy to scare, and I'm there to be scared.
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An excellent customer. My friends enjoy my reactions, but I've
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seen the person behind me get it too. Putting me
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up front is a very unreliable scheme for protection. As
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a filmmaker, I'd want to let that departure breathe. Keep
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the tractor audible for just a little while longer. Let
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the audience feel there's still a familiar machine nearby. Then
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let its sound simply fade beneath the corn. You don't
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need a monster to fill the silence immediately. A sleeve
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brushing a stalk should do it. A footstep that lands
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a fraction after yours. Something ordinary, close enough that you
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turn before deciding whether you needed to. The fun is
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that you came here hoping for exactly this feeling. You
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bought a ticket to become deeply suspicious of agriculture. And
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somebody has dressed the field for just the occasion. Now
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back on our imaginary trail, a scarecrow waits where the
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path bends. It wears an old shirt and a battered
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hat with one arm pointing into the corn. In the afternoon,
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that's a charming photograph. It would fit on a postcard.
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You might stand beside it and point the same way
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for a selfie. At night, When you need a direction,
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it feels like an opinion you never asked for. For me,
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the scarecrow is just about the ultimate Halloween image. It
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belongs in a field, but that rough, almost human shape,
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it still bothers me. I can tell myself what it
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is my lizard brain would like me to Just keep
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an eye on it anyway. Then you start noticing the
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wrong details. How far the hat hangs over its face.
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How the shirt moves when the stalks around it. All
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seems still. In a scene like ours, even an empty
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sleeve could send you shuffling toward the middle of the group.
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Last week, we could admire a neighbor's haunt from the sidewalk,
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but out here, our little Halloween outing has swallowed the sidewalk.
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The path goes past the scarecrow and narrows. The friend
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in front turns left. the corner. For one second, you
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can't see them. Oh, but you can hear something moving
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right along. If you're enjoying this trip into the corn,
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Follow or subscribe to Weekly Spooky for Thursday thrills every
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week and something spooky, scary, and Halloween-y every single day
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of the week and sometimes even twice a week in October.
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Because spooky season is a state of mind, but October
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only comes but once a year. And while you're at it,
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Send this episode to the friend you would trust to
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lead the way. If no one comes to mind, well,
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send it to the friend who would scream the loudest.
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We'll find them a lot faster. All right. Around that corner,
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our friend is still there. But now, the path splits.
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Left looks promising. Right looks exactly as promising as left.
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Behind you, someone has begun explaining why they're certain you've
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already passed this spot. You would find that a lot
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more convincing if they hadn't said it at the previous
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spot as well. A maze gives the scare somewhere to disappear.
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In a straight hallway, you can keep watching the far end,
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but here... The path bends, and whatever made that noise
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gets an entire field to work with. You could see
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a shape cross an opening ahead and arrive there to
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find that nothing is there at all, but, of course,
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another turn. Was it waiting? Moving away? Does it know
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a shortcut? Please let it be a performer who knows
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a shortcut. Please. This year gives us a new, real-world
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reason to think about that arrangement. Arizona's Dark Harvest Haunted
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Park advertises four haunted attractions built inside a corn maze.
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Its 2026 calendar lists selected October nights from the 2nd
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through November 1st. One attraction. Dead Acres uses the fictional
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premise of a cursed farm guarded by sinister scarecrows. Another,
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The Lost Ones, promises winding paths and creatures searching for food.
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And the corn gives all of them somewhere to hide.
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I'd appreciate a little more visibility before I start making
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decisions about which way to... Run. Back in our maze,
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a little opening appears between the stalks. Beyond it, you
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can make out what might be a doorway. At first,
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you're pleased. A building. Buildings have edges. You can go
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around them. They're much easier to reason with than an
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acre of identical plant life. Then you notice the doorway.
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is dark. Something scrapes across the floor inside. Nobody volunteers
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to ask whether this counts as an exit. Suddenly, the
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open air seems lovely. If I mistake a performer for
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a mannequin, one sudden movement will finish me. I can
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hear other groups screaming all night, but the supposedly fake
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person suddenly standing up in front of me, that gets
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me every time. And through all this, you still have
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your friends. Somebody laughs too loudly, somebody points in the
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wrong direction on purpose and immediately regrets it when the
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group believes them. When somebody really gets me, I usually
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thank them once I'm done screaming. I paid to be scared,
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and hey, they delivered. You can sometimes see how pleased
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they are, unless they're still chasing me down with a chainsaw.
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Then the thank you may have to wait at least
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a little bit. Michigan's New Salem corn maze has a
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daytime maze free of ghouls along with family activities, a
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pumpkin patch, and hayrides. Come back after dark, and there
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are performers stalking you through the corn. They've got nighttime
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dates the weekend immediately after this episode. Plenty of time
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to round up some friends and begin that very important
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negotiation about who goes first. And you can choose the
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version you actually enjoy. There's no Halloween exam. Nobody revokes
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your pumpkin because you prefer the daytime maze and an
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extra cider donut. Some haunts let the actors get hands-on,
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so check those rules before you go. Stick to the
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marked path, too. The farmer would probably like to have
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some corn left when Halloween is over. Our group, meanwhile,
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has finally heard something useful. Laughter. Not a sinister recorded cackle.
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People laughing somewhere beyond the next stretch of corn. Then
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a light appears between the stalks. You round the bend
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and find the way out. For a moment, everybody's talking
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all at once. The person who was absolutely not frightened
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is explaining the noise they made. Someone is checking their pockets.
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You find a piece of straw attached to your coat
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and briefly treat it like evidence. The ordinary world has
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come back, and it brought some snacks along. That's how
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a friendly farm becomes a Halloween nightmare worth your visit.
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The familiar comforts stay just far enough away that you
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get to miss them. For a little while, you surrender
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your view of the parking lot and trust the path
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through the dark. Then you come out together, laughing. with
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the rest of October still waiting just for you. I
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hope you all make a little room for an evening
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like that. For yourselves, whatever level of spooky suits you.
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Enjoy the cider while it's warm, take the ridiculous pumpkin photograph,
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give yourself time to stand under the lights afterward and
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tell the story of the scare that Absolutely, definitely did
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not get you. And leave room for one last look back.
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Another wagon is turning away from the farm stand. Its
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passengers are still laughing. The tractor carries them toward the trees,
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and the lights begin to disappear behind it. And you
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know where they're getting off. I'm Enrique Couto, and this
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has been Thursday Thrills. Drive safe, keep your headlights on,
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and enjoy your October nights. When you tell your friends
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you'd happily go through that maze again, let them finish
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their donuts before they call your bluff. Come back tomorrow
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for more fear. Until then, lock your doors. As if
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that will help.