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Hello, my spookys. Tonight we're cracking open. And IDEs of
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March compilation one of four for the aforementioned month, featuring
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four stories built on that special kind of dread where
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the air feels normal, the world looks normal, and yet
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underneath it all, some sharp teeth are grinnae. This is
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the month where promises get tested, where a harmless choice
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turns into a hinge that swings the wrong way, and
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where the past doesn't just knock on the door, it
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lets itself in. You'll feel it in the places that
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pretend to be safe. A cozy room with laughter that's
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a little too I don't know what, a town that
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remembers every insult like a family heirloom, a stretch of
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wilderness that looks like freedom right up until it's clearly not.
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And a lonely highway where the only sound is your
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tires and your heartbeat arguing about whether you should have
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kept driving or not. These stories aren't about monsters the
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way you're used to. They're about the moment the mask slips,
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when someone's patience snaps, when the universe tilts, the road
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goes quiet, and you realize you've been alone in the
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dark for way too long. They're about payback that doesn't
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need an invitation, and justice that doesn't care if you're ready.
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So dim the lights, my spookies, get comfortable as we
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step into this collection from the Weekly Spooky Vault. And
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remember the IDEs of March isn't just a date on
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a calendar, it's a worn that sooner or later, every
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debt gets paid. And remember there's a new scary story
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every single Wednesday here at Weekly Spooky. So make sure
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you're subscribed, and let's begin. Hell Hath No Fury by
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Aaron Cook, Oh, shoot the cookies. Zelda may Darling had
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been in the kitchen all day, and the stress of
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hosting a dinner party had caused her to nearly forget
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about the chocolate chip treats that were roasting in the oven.
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She fitted her dainty hands into mits and plucked her
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signature dessert from the sauna. No blemishes of overcooking to
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be found. Pulling the elongated trays out, she didn't wait
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two minutes before conducting a taste test. Delicious, if she
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did say so herself. She treated herself to a second one.
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Jake wouldn't approve of the extra snack, but what he
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didn't know wouldn't hurt him. There was more than enough food,
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she justified with internal guilt. The housewife had been in
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domestic bliss for three full years and was still in
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her early twenties. Born in smalltown Arkansas in nineteen fifty,
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the bell had left home to attend Texas A and M.
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Towards the end of her first year there, she worked
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an alumni ball where she met Big Jake Darling, an
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oil bigwig and generous donor to his old stomping grounds.
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Despite the three decade age gap, Jake fell madly in
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love with the fair skinned, dark haired server in the
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Go Go boots, and his resources made it pretty easy
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for Zelda May to ignore the pot belly, receding hairline,
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and uneven mustache. After mere weeks of whirlwind courting, the
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pair joined in matchrmony in front of a crowd of
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hundreds at his ninety acre ranch in the otherwise modest
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village of Tumbleweed. Jake was eager to prove to his
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new bile bride that he had learned from the mistakes
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of his first two marriages. There had been some downs.
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Jake was ornery, hypercritical, and mentioned his appreciation for the
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anatomy of other women, most even younger than her, quite often.
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But he was a man, and oh what a man
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he could be. That little wallflower who entered college station
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would be surprised at what she became. Prior to her nuptials,
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Zelda May's culinary expertise topped out at popping microwave popcorn.
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But now she was a regular Julia child. She chuckled
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at what her younger self would say if she found
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out about the elaborate shindigs she now held on a
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regular basis. Tonight she would be hosting a soiree for
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Jake's colleagues and their wives. It was an important one.
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Cattle mogul k L. Bandy had accepted an invitation. Joining
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his inner circle was a guaranteed ticket to political success,
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which the oilman craved. He had been locally beloved on
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the village council for a number of years, but he
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was sick of judging pie bake offs and attending ribbon
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cutting ceremonies for libraries. The state Senate was calling him.
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All Bandy had to do was hand him the phone.
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Ten minutes had passed since Jake's promised five thirty homecoming.
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This worried Zelda May sick. It was a pretty common
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occurrence for him to overshoot his eta, but President never
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made it peaceful. He was a wealthy and powerful man,
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which automatically put a target on his back. The poor
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wife never knew if her gregarious partner had blown away
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the time chatting with an old chum, or had been
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assassinated by an envious political opponent. The hypothetical loss of
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her paramour made her sick to her stomach, but she
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couldn't regress the paranoia. Finally, Jake stumbled in, having gotten
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a head start on the spirit embidement of the night. Hi, Honey,
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Zelda May lit up, Hey biscuit. Jake hiccuped his pet
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name for her, as his massive jowls jiggled and his
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pale white belly cut into his Everything's Bigger in Texas
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belt buckle. He stunk of the cheapest gin Brady's Bar
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had to offer, and the collar of his white Colonel
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Sanders' suit was scuffed. In Zelda May's eyes, she was
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looking at Paul Newman. The guests should be here soon,
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getting there. You need any help? Well, actually, if you
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could Jake's sobering snooze began. The second it was even
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implied there was a way he could streamline the toil
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of his labored spouse. It was no. She was pretty
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sure she liked doing housework. There were still several dishes
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she needed to magically conjure before nine o'clock. Then she
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needed to wash up the feast worked up a sweat,
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and it would be unladylike to not present herself as
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immaculate as possible. Not that long ago, the looming threat
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of the deadline would have scared her something fierce, but
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not anymore. Sure Enough, the spread was laid out, and
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she emerged from the powder room, renewed in her pearls
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and heels, mere minutes before the first ring of the doorbell,
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the sound of which revived her downed Bow, who quickly
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wiped the drool from his face. Harvey Lois the Learners
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were the beneficiaries of the death of the mister's father,
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which granted them control over one of the state's largest
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construction firms. Harvey had never actually seen a pile of rubble,
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and Lois, also from old money, was prone to make
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statements that made her formerly modest friend feel insecure about
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her background. Up next were the Duprees. Don had recently
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acquired controlling interest in the popular, inexpensive and small chain
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Selman's Department Store, which he was eagerly licking his lips
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to merge with a larger company. Flonetta and Ducky Perry
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arrived shortly after years of entertaining them hadn't shed a
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light on what they did for a living. All Zelda
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May knew was they were filthy rich. Just when Zelda
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May was about to shepherd her company into the dining
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room for their banquet, a limousine pulled up to the
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Darling residence. The driver exited his position to release an
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invitee that Zelda May had forgotten about, but Jake certainly hadn't.
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K l Bandy. Everybody stopped what they were doing to
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gaze upon the richest man in the lone star state,
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which angered Lois Learner, who had only he belted out
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a Stanza and a half as she cooed and curled
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over the piano. The VIP looked nothing like the image
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Zelda May had cooked up in her head. She had
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pictured a good old boy with roughly the same features
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as her beloved and his colleagues. Instead, a decrepit skeleton
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shambled up to her porch, escorted on each shoulder by
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a Miss Texas contender. The man half as old as
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the Earth and his gal pals glacially meandered towards his admirers. Inside,
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an irate Jake furiously barked at Zelda May to stop
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daydreaming and open the door for the guest of honor,
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long before he reached the welcome mat, how do mister
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Brandy and excited Don Dupree powered through the crowd to
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win the race. To determine the old man's inaugural conversation,
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Dupree firmly grasped Bandy's hand in a shake which cracked
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the Methuselah of Meat's worn joints. Embarrassed, Double d frantically
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apologized to the unoffended baron. Despite his assurance, Don replayed
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the moment in his head over and over, removing himself
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from the camaraderie to self flagellate. Hello, mister Bandy, beamed
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Zelda May. Jake has told me so much about can
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we get you anything? Mister Bandy? The King of the
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Castle stifled his wife he shot her a dirty look.
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As the ancient one declined, Jake pulled Zelde May aside
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and mentioned his distaste for the comment. When Bandy was
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out of earshot. What things was she implying he had mentioned?
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Did he look suspicious? Just now she was going to
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blow his big shot. Sorry, honey, just don't talk to
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him or look at him. The convoy entered the pure
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white dining room. Effusive scores were given to Zelda May's
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creations before a bite was even taken, including many from
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the treasured newcomer who sat in the head chair after
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the US usual alpha seated his territory for this one
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night only. Convival talk among the boys followed as the
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women chatted about past and future dinner parties. Although a
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rattled Don mostly just nodded in agreement, too worried about
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throwing another boneheaded interception. This was their one chance to
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impress a man that could fatten their portfolios. Ducky Perry
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fantasized about his soon to be new best friend handing
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over the deed to one of his tremendous golf courses.
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Jake took every inch to bring up his steakhouse concept.
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Tired of all beef all the time. The gazillionaire never
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offered much response to the proposal. Did this guy even
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know anything about running a restaurant? Further incessant, half baked
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hypotheticals continued to line dance on the geezer's already feeble nerves.
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The brisket was excellent, the corn was phenomenal, and the
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apple pie had been some of the best he had
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tasted in his countless years on this planet. But another
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round of rump kissers had left Bandy exasperated. Zelda May
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quit staring at mister Bandy. Jake reprimanded his adult wife
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as if she was a toddler with a tattling habit.
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I wasn't, she defended herself. Another round of tupperware talk
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had been her limit for the past ten minutes. She
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had been zoned out, affixed on nothing in particular. Yes,
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you was now apologize. It's quite all right, Bandy foolishly said,
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in an agitation that seemed to imply he was more
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irritated by him than her. Sometimes she gets like this,
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like what Zelda May countered, now, more anxious to hear
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her fictional shortcomings than appearing demure. Don't start, you started it, folks.
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I think I'm gonna call it a night, the esteemed
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mogul said, as he gestured for him twins to help
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him up and out. Part of him felt bad for
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his dogpiled host, but most of him wanted to thank
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her for giving him an excuse to escape this never
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ending assault of false praise. See what you did, Jake blared,
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to a degree that the heart of hearing Bandy heard
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from a room away. Zelda May Honey Floetta's fake accent
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permeated with a passive aggressiveness that elicited a cold draft
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down the pariah's spine. I hope you're happy. I almost
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had a third car dealership, Don whined. The grumbling gaggle
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emotionally and wordlessly returned to their vehicles, leaving Zelda May
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alone to face Jake's wrath. In addition to Tonight's alleged
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staring gaff, he found nitpicks in the food he scarfed down,
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and found flaws with her hair, makeup and chubby cheeks.
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If she kept letting herself go, that girl he saw
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today day after work might just have to move in.
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Jake continued his relentless attack, which would have driven Zelda
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May to tears if she hadn't cried them all out
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over the years. As a compulsion, she started to work
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on the everest of dishes. Of course, the supposed clean
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freak didn't offer her a modicum of help. At least
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he was talking to her. That was a refreshing change
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of pace. She began scrubbing the tainted plates in a
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fury as Jake continued his verbal bulrush a sutty mess,
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Zelda May pulled the dishwasher rack out and marched to
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the fridge for some chardonnay, which she elected to down
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straight from the bottle. Jake scoffed at the lush she
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could be, and attempted to pry the bottle loose much
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bigger his stripsack was overpowering, spiking and staining the kitchen
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floor with wet glass. Naturally, this was seen as purely
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Zelda May's error, which resulted in a final flurry of condescension.
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Sick of hearing these judgments, the harried housewife gave her
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husband a shove her anger, propelling her strength to unprecedented levels.
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The back of Jake's boots skidded over the edge of spillage.
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The hoss tried to compose his balance, which only caused
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him to dance more erratically before he fell over backwards
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in a heap, cracking his neck on the still exposed dishwasher.
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The crunch was louder than the snap of the wishbone
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of her famous Thanksgiving turkey. No choking, no throes, no
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mournful departing apology, instant death. Stunned, the accidental killer stared
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back at her unintentional victim. The eyes that had been
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full of fire just seconds before were now ghostly white.
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She didn't blame herself. It was a self induced accident,
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a fatal folly caused by his own foolishness. Now single
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part of her felt sad about the loss of her partner,
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but more of her felt relieved that there was finally
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some quiet in here. Now she could tidy this mess
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in piece calm as could be. Zelda May grabbed the
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mop and dust pan and commenced the arduous clean up,
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a chore that was made more difficult by the two
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hundred and fifty pound hindrance that blocked some of the puddle.
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Manslaughter was no excuse for a dirty home. My husband
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is dead, she phoned the cops. As hard as she
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tried to appear hysterical, she was no actress. The death
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of Big Jake Darling sent shockwaves through the local community.
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Although Zelda May figured she would be spending the foreseeable
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future playing the part of the sympathetic widow, her adopted
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home quickly made her a female Peter Sellar's and cast
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her in many roles a bloodthirsty harpie, a cold blooded Jezebel,