Nov. 20, 2024

The Legend of Oopsie Poopsie - Dark Humor Meets Grotesque Horror

The Legend of Oopsie Poopsie - Dark Humor Meets Grotesque Horror
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The Legend of Oopsie Poopsie" is a twisted, darkly comedic horror story about a grotesque, six-foot-tall baby with a bloodied rattle and a tragic, inbred origin. Set in a creepy Adirondack town, it blends absurd humor, chilling suspense, and over-the-top gore as an outsider discovers the horrifying truth behind the town’s most infamous legend. Prepare for a story that’s equal parts terrifying and hilariously unsettling.

Oopsie Poopsie by Joe Solmo


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Music by Ray Mattis http://raymattispresents.bandcamp.com

Executive Producers
Rob Fields
Mark Shields
Bobbletopia.com

Produced by Daniel Wilder

This episode is sponsored by 
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🎵 Music by Ray Mattis 👉 Check out Ray’s incredible work here !
👨‍💼 Executive Producers: Rob Fields, Bobbletopia.com
🎥 Produced by: Daniel Wilder
🌐 Explore more terrifying tales at: WeeklySpooky.com
WEBVTT

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In the deep dark woods of the Adirondacks. There's something

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in the shadows, something big and dangerous, waiting for an

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opportunity to attack. What this creature is is something you

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truly won't believe.

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What's that? You want to be scared to? Come with me.

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You will experience tales over opera, ghosts and death act.

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It is not recommended, and for a week at hard.

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Tart listen as in the dark it's more fun at

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that way way. This is Weekly Speaking, Hello, my Spookyes,

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it's Wednesday, and you know what that means. It's time

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for a little spooky in your weekly. I'm your host

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and narrator, Enrique Kuto, and we have a truly twisted,

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bizarre and sick story for you this week from the

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brutal mind of Joe Solmo. But before we get to that,

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I just want to say thank you for listening and

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make sure you're subscribed on your favorite podcasting app like

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Apple Podcasts or Spotify. And while you're there, why not

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leave us a five star rating and help other spookies

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discover the show. And if you love what we're doing,

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Headweeklyspooky dot com, where you can find merchandise and our Patreon,

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where for as little as one dollar a month, you

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can get two bonus shows every thirty days. Have you

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ever wondered what might be lurking in the woods around

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your home? Not the usual stuff, no bears, no coyotes,

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nothing you'd expect, but something wrong, something born out of

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the kind of secrets people try to bury so deep

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they think they'll never be found. They say, in a

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small town up in the Adirondacks, something grew in those woods,

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something that never should have been born. And if you're

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not careful, you might hear it a faint giggle, a

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shuffle in the leaves, and then a shadowy figure steps

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out of the trees, big lopsided and carrying a rattle

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smeared with blood. They call it Oopsie Poopsie, and if

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you hear its name more than once, it's already too late.

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So get comfortable, my friends, because tonight's story will truly

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leave you sickened with fear. And make sure you're subscribed,

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because every single week we bring you new fears for

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your ears. But now get comfortable. We're gonna dive in

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right after this. The Legend of Oopsey Poopsie by Joe

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solma I first heard about Oopsy Poopsy by the locals

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when I moved to the small Adirondack town of New Ellsworth.

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The town only had a handful of street lights and

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not a single sidewalk to be seen. One gas station

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was in the middle of town, across from the Baptist

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church that was built before the abolition of slavery. But

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there were five bars around the local lake. I lived

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down the road a bit from one of the bars,

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on my own island of small house and yard, surrounded

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by a virtual ocean of evergreens. Even in the crisp

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fall air, the trees remained green. They were all lined

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up in rows. Those pines planted there by a lumberyard

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that had cleared it many years ago. It was at

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that lumberyard that I first heard of Oopsie Poopsy. I

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had blown a fuse in the garage, back when you

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could still find fuses, no circuit breakers in this house.

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I was in the electric aisle when a man approached me.

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He had a name tag sewn into his shirt that

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said Sleepy Carl, not just Carl, but sleepy Carl morning.

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Can I help you? He said in a helpful voice.

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His accent was a little bit off, like he had

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seen the words written, but maybe he hadn't heard them

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all used before. Well, I might be giving him too

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much credit. I'm not sure he could read. Looking for

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some fuses for and, I said, rifling through the plastic

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containers holding loose fuses. Where do you live, he asked,

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leaning over me. I could smell the chewing tobacco on

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his breath, and unfortunately watched as a small river of

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brown saliva raced down his chin like it was being

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chased by a rabid dog. And by a rabid dog,

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I mean that lonely incisor left in his mouth. I

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made eye contact with him, then both eyes half closed. Ah, yes,

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I thought, sleepy Carl, it all made sense. Here they are,

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I said, holding up a pair of thirty amp fuses.

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He didn't even look at my offering and kept weird

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eye contact with me. You the new guy over in

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the house on Sinclair, he asked, blocking my way to

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the register. I couldn't tell if it was intentional or not.

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He seemed more stupid then intimidating. That would be the place,

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sleepy Carl, I replied, Sleepy Carl, leave that guy alone.

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Came a woman's voice, from the other side of the building.

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She wandered over to us. I was shocked at her beauty.

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I wasn't expecting such a sight in a backwoods town

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like this. Her long, wavy red hair flowed over her

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shoulders and down her work shirt, almost to her skinny waist.

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Carl jumped at the sound of her voice and wandered

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off into the plumbing aisle across the building as the

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woman approached. Sorry for my brother. He likes to talk

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to people, learn about them, she said. He knows all

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about the folk that come in here. The woman extended

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her hand. I shook it. From this close, I could

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smell her shampoo, and it smelled nice. My name is

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he Dinah, she said John, I replied. Now that we

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are acquainted, I can go ring you up, she said

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over her shoulder. As she made her way to the register,

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I noticed sleepy Carl watching me from the inside of

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a toilet seat. He was holding it up at eye

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level and peeking through it inconspicuously. Of course, he could

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have been called sly Caral with spy instinks like that.

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I couldn't help but smile. As I placed the fuses

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down on the counter, I picked up a folding utility

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knife from a display and put it with the fuses.

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I turned back to see sleepy Carl still looking at me.

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His sister noticed me looking, and her eyes followed my gaze.

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I watched her face redden in embarrassment. Sleepy Carl, get

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your oversized head out of that shitter seat. With a crash,

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Sleepy Carl woke up enough to drop the seat and

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run out the front door to the icy breeze of

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an early November morning in upstate New York. He grabbed

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a rake and started gathering up the fallen leaves in

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the gravel parking lot. The sounds of scraping gravel drifted

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through the open wooden doorway. That'll be eight bucks, she said,

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with a smile. She opened a paper bag and shoved

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my items in. I rifled through my pockets and found

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a crumpled twenty and forked it over to her with

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a smile. She handed me my change and I thrust

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it into my pocket, still watching her brother fight with

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the leaves out front. Someone had pulled in and was

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yelling at him for being in the way. Danah sighed

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and ran past me out the door. I followed, but

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jumped in my car to get out of there instead

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of getting involved in whatever was happening. As I was

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putting on my seatbelt, Sleepy Carl poked his head in

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the passenger side window. You meet oopsie POOPSI, yet asked,

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nearly dropping his tobacco spit on my passenger seat. What's

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an oopsie POOPSI, I asked, putting the car in gear.

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I can come over and explain. Sleepy Carl said, as

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he spat what was left on the parking lot. Leave

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him alone. Ed Dinah called over. Let the poor man

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get back to his business. She grabbed Sleepy Carl by

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his ear and gave a yank apologize to this man

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for wasting his time. Sleepy Carl bowed his head and

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mouthed sorry and walked slowly into the building. I gave

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a Dinah a quick wave and a smile and headed home.

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Forgetting all about a Dinah, Sleepy Carl, and Oopsie Poopsy,

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at least for a few weeks. I was working in

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the yard towards the middle of November, avoiding the call

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from the family to come to Thanksgiving dinner, when I

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noticed something in the tree line. A stark white and

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con contrast to the dark green needles and the darker

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forest within. I put down my rake and left my

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wheelbarrow full of pine cones and walked to the edge

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of the towering trees. There was a branch that had

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fallen in the last storm, about four feet long. I

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gave my rake a glance before picking up the dead branch.

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I poked at the white object and was horrified to

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find that this thing on the ground was a large diaper.

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Used Who the fuck, I asked out loud. Disgusted with

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my find, I looked back at my wheelbarrow, contemplating loading

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the loaded diaper into it for disposal. With a sigh,

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I walked back to my yardwork supplies and picked up

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the handles on the wheelbarrow to bring it closer. A

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gust of wind blew by me, and I heard a

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faint noise on the breeze. In hindsight, I knew what

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it was, my brain just couldn't fathom it. Back then,

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what I heard faintly was a baby's giggle. I continued

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to where the diaper was, and it was gone, nowhere

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to be found. Just then I heard another sound, the

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uneven steps of someone approaching. I turned back towards the

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yard and watched Sleepy Carl making his way across my

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yard and up to me. I gave him a quick

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wave as I turned around, looking into the trees. Did

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you see I started a what, Sleepy Carl asked, A diaper?

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Did you say a diaper? He asked with a spit

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of tobacco. I winced when I saw the glob land

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on the handle of my rake. I guess it was

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time to get a new one. I can just burn

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that one. Yeah, diaper, About this big, I said, holding

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my hands out like showing the old timer down at

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the bait shop, the size of the one that got away.

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Sleepy Carl frowned. He's already starting his shit. Who is

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I asked, closing the gap between us. A bit oopsy poopsy.

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He's taken a like in to you, Carl, Sleepy Carl,

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he interjected, pardon me, Sleepy Carl, what the fuck is

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an oopsy poopsy? We should find him, get him to

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stop before it gets out of hand. Sleepy Carl said,

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you've been in those woods. I looked at the rows

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of pines. Sleepy Carl was pointing at with a dirty finger,

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the tip of which was missing. Yeah, I walked through

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them a bit checking it out. You shouldn't have, he said,

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with sadness in his voice. You got his attention. Who

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oopsy poopsy, we both said at the same time, but

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only he understood what we were talking about. Listen, Sleepy Carl,

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I gotta finish up out here so I can get

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some dinner on the stove before dark. I explained. It

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looked like I only had about an hour left of

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sun and what little warmth it gave this time of year.

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Come with me, Sleepy Carl said in a stern voice,

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and headed into the pine trees. I shook my head

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as I watched him walk deeper into the forest. After

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a moment of indecision, I gave chase.

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You're not safe yet. Weekly Spooky will be right back.

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Wait up, Sleepy Carl, I called after him. Gotta keep

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up so we can make it back before the sun sets.

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He explained what happens after the sunsets. I asked, he'll

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come looking, the local said, looking for me. Yep, was

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his monosyllable reply. I looked down at my hands and

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realized I was still carrying the rake with me. I

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felt silly at first, but as we walked deeper into

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those neat rows of pines. It was almost a comfort

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having it in my hands. The forest sure got spooky fast.

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After about ten minutes or so, walking in silence, Sleepy

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Carl stopped and ran his fingers over the bark of

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a tree. This way, he said, cutting to the right

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and up a slight rise. I stopped at the tree

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and saw faded carved initials in the old bark c

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W Love's e W. At the top of the rise,

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I could see there was a worn path through the

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woods leading down to a valley floor about thirty feet below,

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and heading deeper into the woods. I tried to look

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up at the sun to get a feel for the time,

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and all I could see were branches of pines blocking

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out most of the light. I was beginning to have

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a hard time seeing in front of my own face.

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How much farther is it? I asked him. I placed

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a hand on his shoulder to get him to stop

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for a moment. I was out of breath. Just over here,

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he said, pointing at a boulder on a small hill.

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The trail wrapped around the boulder had a white birch

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tree growing on the top of it like a unicorn's horn,

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and I realized at some point we passed through the

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pine forest into a regular one. The autumn leaves had

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already fallen from the tree, leaving its bones pointing skyward.

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I tried to get a visual on the sun to

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figure out where we were, but the cloud cover and

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the bare, deciduous trees blocked my view of it. Sleepy

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Carl made a motion for me to wait here, and

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I leaned against one of those trees. As he made

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his way to the boulder and peeked around it. I

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noticed my heart wasn't pounding in my ears anymore, and

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I could breathe normally. I placed the rake I had

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been carrying against the tree. I curiously watched as Sleepy

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Carl stared off around the hill. He looked a little different,

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more attentive to his surroundings. I guess, less Sleepy Carl

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00:16:31.799 --> 00:16:35.639
and more irregular Carl. He turned and looked at me

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before disappearing behind the boulder. I reached into my pocket

236
00:16:40.200 --> 00:16:43.080
for a cigarette, out of habit I had quit just

237
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before moving to New Ellsworth. I turned my head listening

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for Sleepy Carl, but couldn't hear anything past the cold

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breeze going through the branches. I shuffled my feet, making

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the crisp leaves rustle underneath. This is when I got

241
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the feeling I was being watched. It didn't so much

242
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as creep up on me, as it just happened. I

243
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gave a quick look around and didn't see anything. I thought,

244
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maybe Sleepy Carl might be playing a trick on me.

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I didn't see him around. The hair stood up on

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my arm, but I couldn't tell if it was from

247
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the breeze or the feeling. I heard that giggle again,

248
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like back in the yard, faint, almost inaudible. Maybe I

249
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should quit smoking the other stuff, I thought. I took

250
00:17:37.240 --> 00:17:41.200
a careful step towards the boulder, cautious not to rustle

251
00:17:41.279 --> 00:17:45.079
up the leaves too much. I heard the giggle again,

252
00:17:46.319 --> 00:17:52.960
this time a little louder closer. Sleepy Carl, you there,

253
00:17:53.680 --> 00:17:59.599
I whispered harshly. After another step. I listened for his response. Carl,

254
00:18:00.839 --> 00:18:06.160
A horrid stench drifted on the breeze. Pee ba doo baba,

255
00:18:07.200 --> 00:18:10.519
came a high pitched voice, just a bit louder than

256
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the giggle I heard. I swear if I find Sleepy

257
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Carl standing behind the boulder with one of those voice

258
00:18:17.440 --> 00:18:20.599
changer things, laughing at me. I would beat him to

259
00:18:20.720 --> 00:18:24.880
death with my rake, my rake. I took a step

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back and reached for it, not taking my eyes off

261
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that boulder with that birch tree horn. I felt something

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00:18:31.160 --> 00:18:33.799
soft in my hand and spun around, and that's when

263
00:18:33.839 --> 00:18:38.000
I saw him. It had to be him. The name

264
00:18:38.200 --> 00:18:44.559
now made sense, Oopsie Poopsy, I forgot all about the rake.

265
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He looked me right in the eye from his left

266
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one anyway. The right eye kind of drooped a bit,

267
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kind of like sleepy Carls. But unlike sleepy carl Oopsy

268
00:18:56.759 --> 00:19:01.000
POOPSI had an oversized head that kind of on too

269
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small of a neck. It stood as tall as I did,

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wearing a filthy striped onesie a six foot bobble headed baby.

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It opened its oversized mouth, revealing the largest and sparsest

272
00:19:16.160 --> 00:19:20.000
baby teeth I have ever seen in a gapped tooth smile.

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In his hand was a rattle the size of a

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baseball bat. Dried blood and matted hair adorned its bulbous end.

275
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It took an unsteady step towards me. At first, its

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head flung back by his momentum. Then carried forward in

277
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a nodding motion as its large feet met the hard ground.

278
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I turned to run to escape the monstrosity behind me.

279
00:19:46.880 --> 00:19:51.119
Was it real? Could Sleepy Carl somehow have climbed into

280
00:19:51.160 --> 00:19:54.640
a giant baby suit to pull a fast one? I

281
00:19:54.759 --> 00:19:57.079
really wanted to rip its head off and see what

282
00:19:57.240 --> 00:20:00.480
was inside, but my body was in full flow mode

283
00:20:00.480 --> 00:20:04.480
and my brain was just along for the ride. Got go,

284
00:20:04.759 --> 00:20:09.400
Boodoo Chase, I heard it say behind me, as the

285
00:20:09.480 --> 00:20:14.000
giant toddler began to lurch after Where the fuck was

286
00:20:14.039 --> 00:20:17.839
Sleepy Carl? I ran around the boulder and down the

287
00:20:17.880 --> 00:20:21.079
path that sank over a ridge and lost my footing,

288
00:20:21.480 --> 00:20:24.839
sliding in the carpet of leaves about thirty yards before

289
00:20:24.920 --> 00:20:28.519
hitting a tree trunk with my ribs. I heard the

290
00:20:28.599 --> 00:20:31.200
air escape my lungs, and I couldn't even cry out

291
00:20:31.200 --> 00:20:34.160
in pain. All I could do was clutch my side

292
00:20:34.200 --> 00:20:38.519
and WinCE. My vision was blurry for a few seconds.

293
00:20:39.119 --> 00:20:41.799
I hurriedly tried to blink it away. I could hear

294
00:20:41.839 --> 00:20:45.359
the damned thing shambling its way down the hill, giggling

295
00:20:45.480 --> 00:20:48.559
like this was some kind of game. I never did

296
00:20:48.720 --> 00:20:52.920
like kids, although I couldn't reason why. Well, now I

297
00:20:53.039 --> 00:20:56.160
had a reason. I got to my feet, still a

298
00:20:56.160 --> 00:20:59.599
bit unsteady, and headed farther down the only path through

299
00:20:59.599 --> 00:21:03.160
the fore I could see in the growing darkness. Stumps,

300
00:21:03.400 --> 00:21:06.440
half buried, roots and rocks all jumped out to slow

301
00:21:06.480 --> 00:21:09.079
me down, and I could hear that top heavy toddler

302
00:21:09.160 --> 00:21:12.599
gaining on me. Ahead in the darkness was a large

303
00:21:12.640 --> 00:21:16.359
wooden building. There was light coming from the broken windows

304
00:21:16.359 --> 00:21:19.279
and a door that stood open. I ran as fast

305
00:21:19.319 --> 00:21:24.240
as I could, hoping someone was inside to help me, anyone.

306
00:21:24.440 --> 00:21:27.880
I burst through the door, gasping for breath, clutching my ribs,

307
00:21:28.440 --> 00:21:31.319
I spun and slammed the door shut behind me and

308
00:21:31.440 --> 00:21:33.440
leaned against it for a minute as I took in

309
00:21:33.480 --> 00:21:39.359
my surroundings. Big rusty saws lined the wall, Machinery littered

310
00:21:39.359 --> 00:21:42.480
the floor. It looked like the place hadn't been used

311
00:21:42.480 --> 00:21:45.759
in years. Piles of leaves were in the corners from

312
00:21:45.799 --> 00:21:49.319
the wind whipping through that open door for years. I

313
00:21:49.400 --> 00:21:52.359
made my way to a dusty and damp desk and

314
00:21:52.480 --> 00:21:55.920
sat in the chair to catch my breath. I heard

315
00:21:55.960 --> 00:22:00.160
nothing coming from outside. Maybe I lost that little basket,

316
00:22:01.119 --> 00:22:04.640
well not little, it was as tall as me. I

317
00:22:04.720 --> 00:22:07.319
once again reached for the pack of cigarettes I didn't

318
00:22:07.359 --> 00:22:10.759
carry anymore. I rummaged through the drawer in the desk

319
00:22:10.839 --> 00:22:14.240
and found an old hunting knife. It was better than nothing.

320
00:22:16.079 --> 00:22:19.079
You made it, I heard from behind me, and jumped

321
00:22:19.119 --> 00:22:22.279
so quickly the chair broke when I landed back on it.

322
00:22:23.119 --> 00:22:26.079
I picked myself up off the floor and looked at

323
00:22:26.119 --> 00:22:31.960
Sleepy Carl watching me. What the fuck was that, Sleepy Carl?

324
00:22:32.359 --> 00:22:37.279
You just left me with that thing. Oopsie, poopsie, he said,

325
00:22:37.640 --> 00:22:41.680
and spit tobacco onto the floor. You knew that thing

326
00:22:41.799 --> 00:22:43.920
was out there, and you brought me into the woods

327
00:22:43.960 --> 00:22:48.759
to do. What? Feed me to that thing? I asked him, suspiciously,

328
00:22:48.799 --> 00:22:52.079
while gripping the handle on that hunting knife. No, you

329
00:22:52.200 --> 00:22:55.160
got me all wrong, Sleepy Carl said, and took a

330
00:22:55.200 --> 00:22:59.039
step closer, closing his hands up to show he was unarmed.

331
00:22:59.599 --> 00:23:02.960
Stay there, What a fuck there? I responded, and showed

332
00:23:03.000 --> 00:23:06.240
him the knife. Wait a second, let me explain, will you,

333
00:23:06.960 --> 00:23:11.079
Sleepy Carl said. He stepped backwards to show he was

334
00:23:11.160 --> 00:23:15.200
not a threat to me. From there, I said, putting

335
00:23:15.279 --> 00:23:17.960
my back to the wall so no Shenanigans could sneak

336
00:23:18.039 --> 00:23:21.519
up behind me. You want to explain how a fucking

337
00:23:21.960 --> 00:23:25.119
six foot baby with a rattle bat just chased me

338
00:23:25.160 --> 00:23:31.839
through the woods, giggling. He's not really a baby. It's complicated.

339
00:23:32.440 --> 00:23:36.000
He was a baby. The body grew, but the mind

340
00:23:36.160 --> 00:23:39.799
never did. He never lost his baby features, they just

341
00:23:39.880 --> 00:23:43.519
got bigger. It was account of the inbreeding, some say.

342
00:23:44.680 --> 00:23:51.359
Sleepy Carl started to explain with another spit of his chew.

343
00:23:51.400 --> 00:23:55.039
Don't go away weekly, Spooky will be right back.

344
00:24:00.640 --> 00:24:04.119
Had to be about twenty years ago. Now, that's when

345
00:24:04.119 --> 00:24:07.759
it happened, right here in these woods. His mother birthed

346
00:24:07.799 --> 00:24:11.519
him out of shame. She had hid her pregnancy and

347
00:24:11.599 --> 00:24:14.319
came out here to get rid of him. She was

348
00:24:14.359 --> 00:24:17.400
going to throw herself off the ravine, thinking it would

349
00:24:17.400 --> 00:24:20.920
cause a miscarriage or maybe even kill her. Then she

350
00:24:20.960 --> 00:24:25.359
wouldn't have to face anyone. Something went wrong with her plan,

351
00:24:25.960 --> 00:24:29.079
I asked the father didn't want her to get rid

352
00:24:29.119 --> 00:24:32.440
of it. He followed her. Neither of them knew then

353
00:24:32.640 --> 00:24:36.000
what she carried in her belly. Just as she was

354
00:24:36.039 --> 00:24:39.440
about to jump, he grabbed her, tried to save her.

355
00:24:40.359 --> 00:24:42.839
She went into labor, hanging there from the cliff like

356
00:24:42.839 --> 00:24:46.480
an ornament on a Christmas tree. He tried to pull

357
00:24:46.480 --> 00:24:49.960
her up but he wasn't strong enough. She begged him

358
00:24:50.000 --> 00:24:54.200
to let go, but he wouldn't. Then her water broke.

359
00:24:55.200 --> 00:24:59.920
They heard it splash the rocks thirty feet below. Jesus

360
00:25:00.119 --> 00:25:04.799
fucking Christ, I said, shaking my head. What do those

361
00:25:04.799 --> 00:25:08.440
two banging have to do with it? Carl asked. I

362
00:25:08.480 --> 00:25:10.720
didn't have the heart to tell him those names were

363
00:25:11.440 --> 00:25:14.640
just one person. I heard a bang on the door.

364
00:25:14.680 --> 00:25:17.960
Both Sleepy Carl and I turned our heads. There was

365
00:25:18.000 --> 00:25:20.960
no mistaking the rattle shaking before it hit the wood.

366
00:25:21.839 --> 00:25:24.119
I didn't have much faith that the door was going

367
00:25:24.160 --> 00:25:27.640
to hold up. She gave birth right there on the

368
00:25:27.640 --> 00:25:31.400
cliff side, the baby dangling from the umbellical cord like

369
00:25:31.440 --> 00:25:35.960
a screaming chandelier from her lady parts smacked into the rocks.

370
00:25:36.440 --> 00:25:40.559
I gather that's how it got so ugly, Sleepy Carl said,

371
00:25:40.599 --> 00:25:43.160
as he raced over to the door, sliding an old

372
00:25:43.200 --> 00:25:47.079
filing cabinet in front of it. Help me. I made

373
00:25:47.079 --> 00:25:49.160
my way over and helped him put the cabinet in

374
00:25:49.160 --> 00:25:54.200
front of the door. Now failure, Goo ba dou, I

375
00:25:54.279 --> 00:25:57.119
heard in a baby voice from the other side. The

376
00:25:57.240 --> 00:26:01.000
rattle crashed into the door, splintering it. I could make

377
00:26:01.000 --> 00:26:04.599
out the baby's one good eye through the opening. Go on,

378
00:26:04.880 --> 00:26:11.160
get sleepy Carl said, I frowned. Really you think that'll work,

379
00:26:11.519 --> 00:26:17.000
I asked. Couldn't hurt? Was his reply? Bye bye do

380
00:26:17.720 --> 00:26:21.160
play time came its voice from the other side of

381
00:26:21.200 --> 00:26:24.000
the door. Then it let out a whale that made

382
00:26:24.079 --> 00:26:27.359
me WinCE and curl into the fetal position. The force

383
00:26:27.400 --> 00:26:29.640
of the whale sent the cabinet away from the door,

384
00:26:29.920 --> 00:26:33.240
and the woods splintered, showing us a six foot fetal

385
00:26:33.359 --> 00:26:37.480
monster framed in the doorway. He sounded hungry to you,

386
00:26:38.160 --> 00:26:44.599
Sleepy Carl asked, I wouldn't know. Wait no more pissed off,

387
00:26:44.599 --> 00:26:48.200
if anything, I responded, As I realized the thing was

388
00:26:48.240 --> 00:26:54.400
walking towards me. Oopsie poopsy, Sleepy Carl called out. The

389
00:26:54.480 --> 00:26:58.240
baby turned towards him and raised its fingers to its lips,

390
00:26:58.799 --> 00:27:03.880
telling him to be quiet. Oopsie poopsy. He called out again.

391
00:27:04.680 --> 00:27:07.799
This time, the larger than life baby turned towards him.

392
00:27:08.240 --> 00:27:14.559
It raised its rattle about to strike now, it yelled

393
00:27:14.559 --> 00:27:19.720
at Sleepy Carl. Oopsie poopsy, he called out a third time.

394
00:27:20.720 --> 00:27:24.119
The baby frozen place after hearing its name a third time.

395
00:27:25.160 --> 00:27:29.519
We actually all frozen that moment. Not a sound stirred

396
00:27:29.640 --> 00:27:34.400
until the damn thing shit its pants right there in

397
00:27:34.400 --> 00:27:38.200
front of us. The wettest of baby mustard shot up

398
00:27:38.240 --> 00:27:42.799
its back inside its striped onesie in an internal chocolate fountain,

399
00:27:43.160 --> 00:27:46.160
splattering the worn wood on the wall of the sawmill

400
00:27:46.319 --> 00:27:50.400
as it erupted from the back of the neck hole. Oopsie,

401
00:27:50.960 --> 00:27:55.400
the baby called out, dropping his rattle and clutching his cheeks.

402
00:27:56.000 --> 00:28:00.960
Change doodo, don't look at me, Carl said, said, incredulously.

403
00:28:01.880 --> 00:28:05.759
Find your mother, he called out. The baby did a

404
00:28:05.799 --> 00:28:09.839
full diaper shuffle out into the forest. That should buy

405
00:28:09.880 --> 00:28:14.400
us some time. We need to get the fuck out

406
00:28:14.400 --> 00:28:17.720
of here, I said, climbing to my feet. The acrid

407
00:28:17.759 --> 00:28:20.720
smell of the diaper detonation still hung in the air.

408
00:28:21.319 --> 00:28:27.000
I covered my nose with my sleeve. We can't not yet, sleepy,

409
00:28:27.039 --> 00:28:30.440
Carl said. He pointed to the gang saw sitting there.

410
00:28:31.000 --> 00:28:33.680
He walked towards the control panel on a stand next

411
00:28:33.680 --> 00:28:37.079
to the machine. It still works, I tried it earlier.

412
00:28:37.640 --> 00:28:41.079
We have a chance to end this. What do you

413
00:28:41.279 --> 00:28:45.240
mean we, I asked him. No one in town will

414
00:28:45.240 --> 00:28:48.640
do anything about Oopsie. Poopsie. I was hoping you, being

415
00:28:48.680 --> 00:28:54.079
an outsider, would help help me kill it, Sleepy Carl explained,

416
00:28:54.119 --> 00:28:57.519
with a spit of tobacco. Why are you the one

417
00:28:57.559 --> 00:28:59.720
in town that wants to do something about it? And

418
00:28:59.799 --> 00:29:02.160
how how did you know saying his name three times

419
00:29:02.240 --> 00:29:05.880
would make him spurt a shit fond up its back?

420
00:29:06.440 --> 00:29:09.640
I asked him. A door opened on the second floor

421
00:29:09.720 --> 00:29:15.119
foreman's office and outstepped a Dinah. Because he is Oopsie

422
00:29:15.200 --> 00:29:20.359
Poopsy's father, she dropped the bombshell on me. And you've

423
00:29:20.400 --> 00:29:24.200
met his mother, Sleepy Carl said, pointing at her with

424
00:29:24.240 --> 00:29:28.680
a sigh. Wait. I thought you too were brother and sister,

425
00:29:29.119 --> 00:29:33.799
I asked, confused, we are, they both said at the

426
00:29:33.839 --> 00:29:39.920
same time. That explained a lot. I thought. Let me

427
00:29:39.960 --> 00:29:44.920
finish my story, Sleepy Carl said. You see, with his

428
00:29:45.119 --> 00:29:48.599
love hanging there, with the screaming, angry faced pile of

429
00:29:48.640 --> 00:29:52.079
hate swinging from her like the pendulum on a grandfather clock,

430
00:29:52.960 --> 00:29:56.599
I realized that the child wasn't right. It looked up

431
00:29:56.599 --> 00:29:58.640
at me with one good eye and gave me a

432
00:29:58.680 --> 00:30:03.480
look of your brutality. How can something so new to

433
00:30:03.519 --> 00:30:07.559
the world hate so much? Then it gave me an

434
00:30:07.599 --> 00:30:10.839
evil smile and began to pull itself up on the

435
00:30:10.920 --> 00:30:15.559
umbellical cord, one hand over the other. He droned on

436
00:30:15.799 --> 00:30:19.480
as he relived the moment. I couldn't tell if it

437
00:30:19.519 --> 00:30:25.440
was coming for me or to unburth itself an abortion,

438
00:30:26.160 --> 00:30:30.319
I asked, tell him what you did next, A Dinah said,

439
00:30:30.519 --> 00:30:34.319
As Oopsi Poopsy entered the doorway behind her, she reached

440
00:30:34.319 --> 00:30:37.200
out her hand and gave him a loving pet, running

441
00:30:37.200 --> 00:30:42.519
her hand through his sparse hair. I let go, Sleepy

442
00:30:42.559 --> 00:30:46.440
Carl said, absently. Oopsy Poopsy made the sound of an

443
00:30:46.440 --> 00:30:52.480
airplane going down and crashing. That's right, sweet child, A

444
00:30:52.559 --> 00:30:55.920
Dinah said, with a sad smile. Then she faced me.

445
00:30:57.039 --> 00:31:00.440
I fell down that ledge, landing on my baby. I

446
00:31:00.480 --> 00:31:03.839
heard him grow silent, and in that moment, I knew

447
00:31:03.839 --> 00:31:06.079
it was wrong for me to wish for my baby's death.

448
00:31:06.960 --> 00:31:09.720
I prayed that night, prayed to anything that would listen

449
00:31:09.759 --> 00:31:13.519
to save my baby, to allow him to grow up.

450
00:31:13.839 --> 00:31:19.319
A Dinah explained, something answered her. Sleepy Carl took over

451
00:31:19.359 --> 00:31:25.480
the story, something dark and primordial. I couldn't make it

452
00:31:25.559 --> 00:31:28.480
down there in the ravine with her. These old woods

453
00:31:28.480 --> 00:31:30.880
are full of evil shit, just trying to fuck with you.

454
00:31:31.599 --> 00:31:34.160
I didn't hear the deal they made by the time

455
00:31:34.200 --> 00:31:37.000
I made my way down to her, she was clutching

456
00:31:37.039 --> 00:31:41.440
Oopsie in her hands, crying as he took shallow breaths.

457
00:31:42.000 --> 00:31:46.279
Then he cried that whil we heard earlier the wail

458
00:31:46.400 --> 00:31:51.000
of the hungry I call it. She started to feed him.

459
00:31:51.359 --> 00:31:54.359
That's what brought me out here tonight. A Dinah said,

460
00:31:55.079 --> 00:31:59.079
I heard my hungry child's scream. She unbuttoned her shirt

461
00:31:59.240 --> 00:32:02.200
and pulled one of her breasts out. Chunks of flesh

462
00:32:02.200 --> 00:32:05.079
were missing, and healed over, giving it the look of

463
00:32:05.119 --> 00:32:09.599
a breast shaped lumpy mashed potatoes with a chewed bubblegum nipple.

464
00:32:10.960 --> 00:32:16.160
Those are some tattered titters, Sleepy Carl said. Oopsy Poopsy

465
00:32:16.319 --> 00:32:18.920
ducked down and latched on with his one big tooth.

466
00:32:19.599 --> 00:32:22.400
A Dinah let out a sign that seemed forty percent

467
00:32:22.519 --> 00:32:27.519
pain and sixty percent ecstasy. It was about this time

468
00:32:27.599 --> 00:32:31.400
I got a bit creeped out, if I'm honest, but

469
00:32:31.440 --> 00:32:35.440
that boy ain't right. It's an abomination, Sleepy Carl said,

470
00:32:35.480 --> 00:32:39.759
looking around for something before grabbing a broken board. He

471
00:32:39.920 --> 00:32:44.039
should have died, then, How can you say that about

472
00:32:44.039 --> 00:32:47.119
the product of our love? A Dinah yelled over the

473
00:32:47.119 --> 00:32:51.599
top of the large head of her baby boy, what love?

474
00:32:52.119 --> 00:32:54.759
We boned in the hay behind old Man Thompson's barn

475
00:32:54.960 --> 00:32:58.319
after stealing mom's peach snops. She hid it under the

476
00:32:58.359 --> 00:33:01.920
porch when Pau took her back. I could barely stand up,

477
00:33:02.000 --> 00:33:05.480
let alone know who the fuck I was fucking, Sleepy

478
00:33:05.519 --> 00:33:08.960
Carl said, heading towards her. You know there was something

479
00:33:09.000 --> 00:33:13.240
between us. A Dinah yelled out, Oopsie poopsy let go

480
00:33:13.359 --> 00:33:16.200
of his mother's breast and began to cry as blood

481
00:33:16.240 --> 00:33:20.440
and milk ran down the front of her Mommy and daddy.

482
00:33:20.519 --> 00:33:25.559
No fight, Bago, the monstrosity called out. It threw its

483
00:33:25.559 --> 00:33:29.279
hands down in frustration before plopping itself down on the

484
00:33:29.319 --> 00:33:32.319
floor at the bottom of the stairs, blocking us from

485
00:33:32.359 --> 00:33:36.319
his mother, who was tucking herself back in and buttoning up.

486
00:33:37.960 --> 00:33:40.480
Did you hear that? Better check the locks on your

487
00:33:40.519 --> 00:33:44.000
doors weekly, Spooky. We'll be right back.

488
00:33:48.880 --> 00:33:52.119
Please Edna help me make this shit right. You know

489
00:33:52.200 --> 00:33:55.000
this isn't a normal kid. It's like a baby balloon

490
00:33:55.039 --> 00:34:00.720
filled with hatred and shit, Sleepy Carl pleaded, But he

491
00:34:00.960 --> 00:34:04.279
is us. Look at him, a Dinah said, with an

492
00:34:04.319 --> 00:34:08.360
adoring look on her face. He looks like someone smacked

493
00:34:08.400 --> 00:34:10.719
him with a towel while dropping the ugly tree on

494
00:34:10.760 --> 00:34:14.840
his face. He's murdered before, you know that. I can't

495
00:34:14.880 --> 00:34:17.719
have that on my conscience when I die and face

496
00:34:17.760 --> 00:34:20.079
old Pete up there at the gates, I don't want

497
00:34:20.159 --> 00:34:22.480
him saying I fathered a child murderer and let him

498
00:34:22.559 --> 00:34:27.679
run free. Sleepy Carl was all fired up. Now does

499
00:34:27.719 --> 00:34:33.719
he kill other children? I asked, what? No, just outsiders?

500
00:34:33.800 --> 00:34:38.639
Really a Dinah answered, Confused by my question, I was

501
00:34:38.679 --> 00:34:41.760
beginning to see that no matter which way the DNA fell,

502
00:34:42.320 --> 00:34:47.800
oopsie POOPSI had no chance to be a rocket scientist. Ah, child,

503
00:34:47.920 --> 00:34:52.519
that is a murderer, I said out loud. Now understanding,

504
00:34:53.480 --> 00:34:56.280
maybe I shouldn't look up any careers at NASA either.

505
00:34:57.440 --> 00:35:01.000
It's time to end this, Sleepy Carl said and charged

506
00:35:01.039 --> 00:35:05.079
his awful infused offspring. He swung that board and bounced

507
00:35:05.079 --> 00:35:08.159
it off the moon sized forehead of Oopsy with a crack.

508
00:35:09.400 --> 00:35:12.079
The kid fell back into his mother's legs as she

509
00:35:12.199 --> 00:35:15.400
stood there in shot. It took only a few seconds

510
00:35:15.440 --> 00:35:19.880
for Oopsy to recover and begin to cry. What do

511
00:35:20.400 --> 00:35:25.119
mem It called out and got to its feet. It

512
00:35:25.159 --> 00:35:28.400
grabbed Sleepy Carl and shook him hard before pulling on

513
00:35:28.480 --> 00:35:31.480
his arm like a rag doll. I looked around for

514
00:35:31.519 --> 00:35:34.000
something to help him with and saw the baby blue

515
00:35:34.039 --> 00:35:37.599
of the rattle sitting by the door. I ran over

516
00:35:37.639 --> 00:35:40.679
and grabbed it, the motion making a noise worthy of

517
00:35:40.719 --> 00:35:45.360
its namesake, oopsy POOPSI turned to face me. With a

518
00:35:45.440 --> 00:35:49.159
quick yank, he dislocated Sleepy Carl's arm and dropped him

519
00:35:49.199 --> 00:35:52.239
to the floor. He had found a new toy he

520
00:35:52.320 --> 00:35:57.320
wanted to play with. Fine, he said in his baby voice,

521
00:35:57.800 --> 00:36:02.119
but sternly coming get it, I said, raising it like

522
00:36:02.199 --> 00:36:05.920
I was looking to hit a home run. He hobbled

523
00:36:05.960 --> 00:36:09.599
towards me, feet slapping the floor as he thundered nearer.

524
00:36:10.760 --> 00:36:13.760
I was waiting for my moment to strike, and swung

525
00:36:13.840 --> 00:36:16.679
with all my might at his neck. I figured that

526
00:36:16.920 --> 00:36:20.280
was his weak spot, since he had such a giant head.

527
00:36:21.320 --> 00:36:26.440
Crack yep, that stopped him, I thought, As the six

528
00:36:26.440 --> 00:36:30.000
foot obsentity crumpled to the floor, I cheered out loud

529
00:36:30.039 --> 00:36:32.400
before heading over to Sleepy Carl to see if he

530
00:36:32.480 --> 00:36:37.239
was okay. My baby a Dinah called out and ran

531
00:36:37.320 --> 00:36:40.239
towards me with her arms out to choke me, but

532
00:36:40.320 --> 00:36:43.760
a second swing of the bat dropped her too. I

533
00:36:43.920 --> 00:36:49.559
was not fucking around anymore. Carl, you okay, I asked

534
00:36:49.559 --> 00:36:52.440
as I bent down next to him. He was whimpering

535
00:36:52.480 --> 00:36:58.960
in pain. Sleepy Carl, he whispered, seriously. You're gonna correct me,

536
00:36:59.840 --> 00:37:02.039
asked as I tried to help him to his feet

537
00:37:02.400 --> 00:37:05.840
without pulling on his bad arm. How bad is it?

538
00:37:07.079 --> 00:37:10.840
I think you dislocated it. You're gonna have to reset it,

539
00:37:11.400 --> 00:37:17.119
Sleepy Carl said. Bad toy came Oopsy's voice from the floor.

540
00:37:17.119 --> 00:37:19.960
As it stirred. It looked down at a dinah laying

541
00:37:20.000 --> 00:37:22.119
on the floor, bleeding from where I cracked her with

542
00:37:22.159 --> 00:37:26.239
its rattle. Oh shit, did I kill her? I didn't

543
00:37:26.280 --> 00:37:32.360
mean to. Did I hurt mommy? It said through drooling lips.

544
00:37:32.559 --> 00:37:36.159
As it got to its unsteady feet, the large bobble

545
00:37:36.199 --> 00:37:40.360
head swung around precariously. I wonder if I broke its neck.

546
00:37:41.000 --> 00:37:43.679
I raised the rattle and got between Sleepy Carl and

547
00:37:43.719 --> 00:37:47.800
his putrid progeny. It took an ungainly step towards me.

548
00:37:48.599 --> 00:37:50.960
I gripped the handle tight, waiting for it to strike.

549
00:37:51.639 --> 00:37:55.480
It looked down at its mama. Sadness crossed its features.

550
00:37:56.239 --> 00:37:59.599
First it nudged her with its foot, Then it kicked her.

551
00:38:00.280 --> 00:38:06.480
Mommy up, it said, you leave her alone, yelled sleepy Carl.

552
00:38:07.000 --> 00:38:09.400
One eye looked up at us, then returned to the

553
00:38:09.400 --> 00:38:15.840
motionless Adnah, mommy up, it said again, and kicked her hard.

554
00:38:16.679 --> 00:38:18.880
She slid a foot or so on the age worn

555
00:38:18.880 --> 00:38:24.000
wooden floor. Now knock that off, Sleepy Carl said, stepping

556
00:38:24.039 --> 00:38:28.760
around me. Oopsy snarled and came after us. I panicked

557
00:38:28.760 --> 00:38:32.039
and swung the rattle. I missed Oopsy by a mile,

558
00:38:32.159 --> 00:38:35.840
but I did connect. Sleepy Carl went down with a

559
00:38:35.880 --> 00:38:40.199
scream as I made contact with his shoulder. He crumpled

560
00:38:40.239 --> 00:38:44.679
into a muling pile next to a Dinah shit, sorry,

561
00:38:44.679 --> 00:38:47.840
sleepy Carl, I said, and took a step back from

562
00:38:47.840 --> 00:38:51.079
Oopsy as it looked at his parents lying on the floor.

563
00:38:51.599 --> 00:38:54.079
I backed against the saw I was running out of

564
00:38:54.079 --> 00:38:58.000
space to move. In desperation, I climbed up onto the platform.

565
00:38:58.320 --> 00:39:01.039
He followed me up, grabbing at me. I managed to

566
00:39:01.159 --> 00:39:03.400
keep him at bay. As I worked my way backwards,

567
00:39:03.880 --> 00:39:06.519
I knew that giant saw blade was somewhere behind me.

568
00:39:07.480 --> 00:39:10.000
I saw a sleepy Carl stir and make it to

569
00:39:10.039 --> 00:39:14.000
his feet. He rubbed his shoulder. Son of a bitch,

570
00:39:14.360 --> 00:39:18.119
you knocked it back into place, he said, with a smile.

571
00:39:18.679 --> 00:39:21.400
I used the distraction to whack the watermelon head of

572
00:39:21.440 --> 00:39:25.400
our adversary. He fell to one knee. I cracked him

573
00:39:25.400 --> 00:39:27.719
again and jumped over the log, lined up for the

574
00:39:27.800 --> 00:39:32.519
saw to get some distance. The teetering perpetual toddler tried

575
00:39:32.559 --> 00:39:35.760
to follow me, and I watched as Sleepy Carl knifed

576
00:39:35.760 --> 00:39:39.159
his son just under the ribs. I checked my pocket.

577
00:39:39.840 --> 00:39:42.440
That cheeky bastard had stolen the knife I had stolen

578
00:39:42.519 --> 00:39:46.440
from the desk. How dare he? The baby tried to

579
00:39:46.519 --> 00:39:49.599
turn on its attacker and lost his balance, falling onto

580
00:39:49.599 --> 00:39:52.639
the log. I gave him a quick crack to the face.

581
00:39:53.320 --> 00:39:56.480
Blood and snot shot out of his now flattened nose,

582
00:39:57.199 --> 00:40:01.000
and he fell limp, his arms dangling on either side

583
00:40:01.039 --> 00:40:07.360
of the log. Look, said Sleepy Carl. Baby on board.

584
00:40:08.480 --> 00:40:11.920
He looked at me so damn serious. I cracked right up.

585
00:40:12.360 --> 00:40:15.239
I shook my head, trying to stop laughing and pay

586
00:40:15.280 --> 00:40:18.960
attention to the task at hand. You know what we

587
00:40:19.079 --> 00:40:22.400
have to do, right, I asked him. He nodded and

588
00:40:22.440 --> 00:40:26.280
pointed to the control panel. I'll get the rope, he said.

589
00:40:26.719 --> 00:40:29.360
I kept an eye on our sleepy little guy until

590
00:40:29.360 --> 00:40:32.400
he came back and helped me tie Oopsie Poopsie onto

591
00:40:32.400 --> 00:40:35.719
that log. Once we were sure he wasn't going anywhere,

592
00:40:35.800 --> 00:40:38.840
I slapped my palm against the green switch and the

593
00:40:38.880 --> 00:40:42.599
machinery jumped to life. The giant blade started to spin.

594
00:40:43.239 --> 00:40:45.360
I yanked on the lever next to the console, and

595
00:40:45.400 --> 00:40:49.559
the log lurched into motion, slowly making its way towards

596
00:40:49.559 --> 00:40:52.920
the saw. Soon, the teeth of the blade bit into

597
00:40:52.960 --> 00:40:57.079
the old wood and sawdust began to fly. Sleepy Carl

598
00:40:57.199 --> 00:41:01.000
towered over his son, watching him intensely as I stood

599
00:41:01.000 --> 00:41:03.639
near the lever. It was a good thing I did,

600
00:41:03.679 --> 00:41:06.639
because I saw the motion he would have missed. I

601
00:41:06.719 --> 00:41:09.119
called out to Sleepy Carl and warned him as a

602
00:41:09.119 --> 00:41:11.480
Dinah tackled him and they went over the other side

603
00:41:11.519 --> 00:41:14.840
of the machine. He carried their momentum and rolled on

604
00:41:14.920 --> 00:41:17.960
top of her, trying to hold her hands down, but

605
00:41:18.079 --> 00:41:22.519
she overwhelmed him. I looked at Oopsy Poopsy. There was

606
00:41:22.559 --> 00:41:24.719
only a foot of wood to go now before its

607
00:41:24.760 --> 00:41:29.480
giant bulba's head. Leave my baby alone, A Dinah called

608
00:41:29.519 --> 00:41:31.639
out as she landed a hell of a punch into

609
00:41:31.639 --> 00:41:35.639
Sleepy Karl's face. You may be my baby's father, but

610
00:41:35.760 --> 00:41:38.079
you're still my little brother, and I can still kick

611
00:41:38.159 --> 00:41:42.239
your ass, she yelled with another swing. I watched as

612
00:41:42.280 --> 00:41:45.079
he struggled to get out of her way. He fended

613
00:41:45.119 --> 00:41:47.400
her off the best he could, afraid to strike back.

614
00:41:48.280 --> 00:41:51.199
I had no reservations, though, and I clocked her with

615
00:41:51.280 --> 00:41:55.159
the rattle. She took an unsteady step back and slipped

616
00:41:55.199 --> 00:41:59.480
on the uneven moving log and landed right across Oopsy Poopsy,

617
00:42:00.599 --> 00:42:04.320
only an inch to go. Suddenly, the kid woke up

618
00:42:04.440 --> 00:42:07.039
and began to thrash around until his eyes fell on

619
00:42:07.159 --> 00:42:10.039
his mama laying on him. He gathered her up in

620
00:42:10.119 --> 00:42:15.920
his arms and squeezed my boy. She cried as the

621
00:42:15.960 --> 00:42:19.599
tears started to run down her face. Soon it wasn't

622
00:42:19.639 --> 00:42:23.760
just tears, but the blood of her unnatural offspring. As

623
00:42:23.800 --> 00:42:27.760
the blade sliced into the large skull, shaking its splitting

624
00:42:27.840 --> 00:42:28.800
head like Michael J.

625
00:42:28.960 --> 00:42:29.360
Fox.

626
00:42:30.280 --> 00:42:32.920
As the blood coated everything in a five foot radius,

627
00:42:33.039 --> 00:42:36.480
I noticed neither mother or son was moving anymore. I

628
00:42:36.559 --> 00:42:38.639
walked over to the switch and hit the big red

629
00:42:38.679 --> 00:42:41.159
button just as the blade was working its way through

630
00:42:41.159 --> 00:42:47.599
Oopsy's chest and his mother's ribs. Holy shit, sleepy Carl said,

631
00:42:48.440 --> 00:42:51.880
holy shit. I agreed as I walked close to the

632
00:42:51.920 --> 00:42:54.480
scene of the carnage, looking for any sign of life

633
00:42:54.679 --> 00:43:02.440
from either body. Oopsy poopsy, oopsy poopsy, Oopsie poopsie, I said,

634
00:43:03.000 --> 00:43:06.960
and looked at the corpse expectantly. A few seconds past

635
00:43:07.079 --> 00:43:27.039
and I started to get disappointed. Then I said, well,

636
00:43:27.119 --> 00:43:32.480
my spookies, I hope you enjoyed that terrifying and truly

637
00:43:32.599 --> 00:43:37.199
bizarre story by our good buddy splattered Joe Solmo. Joe

638
00:43:37.239 --> 00:43:40.840
always brings something a bit different to the table, and

639
00:43:41.000 --> 00:43:44.039
we are sure happy to have him on our side.

640
00:43:44.960 --> 00:43:47.760
I hope you enjoyed this week's episode, and remember next week,

641
00:43:47.960 --> 00:43:51.159
the day before American Thanksgiving, We're gonna have a very

642
00:43:51.199 --> 00:43:55.159
special Thanksgiving Day episode just for you to enjoy as

643
00:43:55.199 --> 00:43:58.599
you make your drives to family members' homes or cooking

644
00:43:58.639 --> 00:44:02.679
food or just taking some time for yourself. There's no

645
00:44:02.719 --> 00:44:05.400
wrong answer, but Weekly Spooky is always here for you

646
00:44:05.920 --> 00:44:09.599
for those big holiday moments. So make sure you're subscribed

647
00:44:09.639 --> 00:44:12.039
on your favorite podcasting app. And if you love what

648
00:44:12.079 --> 00:44:14.320
we're doing and want to give us some direct support,

649
00:44:14.679 --> 00:44:17.760
we really do appreciate it. You can go to Weeklyspooky

650
00:44:17.840 --> 00:44:21.000
dot com slash join and for as little as one

651
00:44:21.079 --> 00:44:24.679
dollar a month, support the show and get two bonus

652
00:44:24.679 --> 00:44:28.760
shows every single month. It makes a huge difference. Come

653
00:44:28.760 --> 00:44:32.159
and join over one hundred other Spookies in supporting the

654
00:44:32.159 --> 00:44:36.880
show at Weeklyspooky dot com slash join. And speaking of Patreon,

655
00:44:36.920 --> 00:44:39.119
I want to say an extra special thank you to

656
00:44:39.199 --> 00:44:42.440
our Patreon podcast boosters, folks who pay just a little

657
00:44:42.440 --> 00:44:44.960
bit more to hear their name on the show. And

658
00:44:45.000 --> 00:44:48.920
they are Jessica Fuller, Johnny Nix, Jenny Green, Amber Hansford,

659
00:44:48.920 --> 00:44:52.440
Brent McCullough, Karen we Met, Jack Kerr, and Craig Cohen.

660
00:44:52.599 --> 00:44:53.960
If you want to hear your name at the end

661
00:44:54.000 --> 00:44:56.920
of every episode of Weekly Spooky, just go to Weeklyspooky

662
00:44:56.960 --> 00:44:59.960
dot com slash join and select the tier at fifth

663
00:45:00.079 --> 00:45:02.400
teen dollars a month or higher. You get all the

664
00:45:02.440 --> 00:45:05.639
other benefits as well as hearing your name through my

665
00:45:05.800 --> 00:45:09.079
silky smooth voice. But now, my friends, I gotta get

666
00:45:09.119 --> 00:45:12.119
back to work because we have a huge, huge surprise

667
00:45:12.239 --> 00:45:15.159
plan for December, but I don't want to spoil it

668
00:45:15.320 --> 00:45:18.320
just yet, so make sure you're subscribed and I'll see

669
00:45:18.360 --> 00:45:21.559
you back here next week. For myself, for my producer

670
00:45:21.639 --> 00:45:25.440
Dan Wilder, my executive producers Rob Fields, Markshields and Bobotopia

671
00:45:25.480 --> 00:45:28.679
dot Com, and my composer Ray Maddis. I will talk

672
00:45:28.719 --> 00:45:33.159
at you later, Oopsie, thank you for.

673
00:45:33.159 --> 00:45:34.039
This, Nazeries.

674
00:45:34.679 --> 00:45:37.559
Make sure to find your way back next week week,

675
00:45:38.280 --> 00:45:41.119
but for now you are safe.

676
00:45:42.559 --> 00:45:43.119
Trust me.